Life Is Only A Reflection Of What We Allow Ourselves To See

mallard-5

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 320.

Mallard

A duck waddles into a card shop, he waddles his way to the front desk asking the clerk, Do you got any tape?

The clerk replies, No. So the duck waddles away. The very next day at the same time the same duck waddles into the Card Shop he waddles right up to that same clerk asking him, Do you have any tape?

The clerk looking irritated replying in a stern voice, No! We are a card shop we sell cards not tape! And if you ask me again I will nail your bill to the counter!

So the duck just waddles away. At the same time the next day the Duck is waddling into that same card shop He waddles right up to that same clerk asking him, do you have any nails? The clerk says, no. Then the duck replied good!! So do you have any tape?

Interesting Fact: Mallard pairs form long before the spring breeding season. Pairing takes place in the fall, but courtship can be seen all winter. Only the female incubates the eggs and takes care of the ducklings. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Mallard/lifehistory )

Advertisements

Now That’s What I Call Spread Eagle

bald-eagle-juvenile

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 320.

Bald Eagle ( Juvenile )

What does the eagle say to his friends before they go out hunting for food ?

“Let us prey.”

Interesting Fact: The largest Bald Eagle nest on record, in St. Petersburg, Florida, was 2.9 meters in diameter and 6.1 meters tall. Another famous nest—in Vermilion, Ohio—was shaped like a wine glass and weighed almost two metric tons. It was used for 34 years until the tree blew down. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Bald_Eagle/lifehistory )

Swim At Your Own Risk

mute-swan-swimming

F/5.6, 1/125, ISO 320.

Mute Swan

Why did the teacher jump into the water?

She wanted to test the water!

Interesting Fact: The black knob at the base of the male Mute Swan’s bill swells during the breeding season and becomes noticeably larger than the female’s. The rest of the year the difference between the sexes is not obvious.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Mute_Swan/lifehistory )

All Good Things Are Wild And Free

white-tailed-deer-buck

F/6.3, 1/100, ISO 200.

White-Tailed Deer

What is the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts?

Beer nuts cost a buck twenty-five. Deer nuts are under a buck!

Interesting Fact: The male white tailed deer, buck, normally weighs about 130-300 pounds. The female, doe, weighs about 90-200 pounds. The average height is 3 feet. ( http://www.brighthub.com/environment/science-environmental/articles/48142.aspx )

 

We Own The Night

 

new-york-city-manhattan-1

F/18.0, 26.0, ISO 80

New York City, Manhattan

A couple had lived together in the backwoods for over fifty years.

To celebrate their fiftieth anniversary, he took her to a large city and they checked into a plush hotel.

She said to the bellman, “We refuse to settle for such a small room. No windows, no bed, and no air conditioning.”

“But, madam!”, replied the bellman.

“Don’t ‘But madam’ me,” she continued. “You can’t treat us like we’re a couple of fools just because we don’t travel much, and we’ve never been to the big city, and never spent the night at a hotel. I’m going to complain to the manager.”

“Madam,” the bellman said, “this isn’t your room; this is the elevator!”

Interesting Fact: The name “Manhattan” derives from the word Manna-hata, as written in the 1609 logbook of Robert Juet, an officer on Henry Hudson‘s yacht Halve Maen (Half Moon).[35] A 1610 map depicts the name as Manna-hata, twice, on both the west and east sides of the Mauritius River (later named the Hudson River). The word “Manhattan” has been translated as “island of many hills” from the Lenape language.[36] The United States Postal Service prefers that mail addressed to Manhattan use “New York, NY” rather than “Manhattan, NY”.[

Bring On The Night!

jersey-city-downtown-park

F/18.0, 24.0, ISO 80.

Newport Green Park Downtown Jersey City

A man asked his wife what she’d like for her birthday. “I’d love to be six again,” she replied.
On the morning of her birthday, he got her up bright and early and off they went to a local theme park.
What a day! He put her on every ride in the park: the Death Slide, the Screaming Loop, the Wall of Fear, everything there was!
Wow! Five hours later she staggered out of
the theme park, her head reeling and her stomach upside down.
Right to a McDonald’s they went, where her husband ordered her a Happy Meal with extra fries and a refreshing chocolate shake.
Then it was off to a movie, the latest Star Wars epic, a hot dog, popcorn, Pepsi, and M&Ms.
What a fabulous adventure! Finally she wobbled home with her husband and collapsed into bed.
He leaned over and lovingly, asked, “Well, dear, what was it like being six again?”
One eye opened. “You idiot, I meant my dress size.”
The moral of this story: Even when the man is listening, he’s still gonna get it wrong.

Interesting Fact: Newport is a 600-acre (2.4 km2) master-planned, mixed-use community in Downtown Jersey City, New Jersey, United States, consisting of retail, residential, office, and entertainment facilities. The neighborhood is situated on the Hudson Waterfront opposite the Tribeca area of Lower Manhattan in New York City, on what had been the yards of Erie Railroad‘s Pavonia Terminal. Redevelopment of the neighborhood began in 1986 as a $10 billion project led by real-estate tycoon Samuel J. LeFrak and his firm The LeFrak Organization.  ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Newport,_Jersey_City )

 

 

I’m Hungry Like The Wolf!

great-blue-heron-water

F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 250.

Great Blue Heron

A minister is stopped by a state trooper for speeding. The trooper smells alcohol on his breath and sees an empty wine bottle on the floor.

The trooper asks, “Sir, have you been drinking?” And the minister says, “Just water.”

The trooper says, “Then why do I smell wine?” And the minister looks down at the bottle and says,

“Good Lord, He’s done it again!”

Interesting Fact: Great Blue Herons in the northeastern U.S. and southern Canada have benefited from the recovery of beaver populations, which have created a patchwork of swamps and meadows well-suited to foraging and nesting. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Great_Blue_Heron/lifehistory )

Use Your Head!

yellow-bellied-sapsucker-2

F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 400.

Yellow-Bellied Sapsucker

What did the trees wear to Mother Nature’s pool party?

Swimming trunks!

Interesting Fact: The Yellow-bellied Sapsucker frequently uses human-produced materials to help in its territorial drumming. Street signs and metal chimney flashing amplify the irregular tapping of a territorial sapsucker. The sapsucker seems to suffer no ill effects of whacking its bill on metal, and a bird will return to a favorite sign day after day to pound out its Morse code-like message. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Yellow-bellied_Sapsucker/lifehistory  )

I Am In To Head Banging, What Music Do you Like?

downy-woodpecker-2

F/6.3, 1/1000, ISO 800.

Downy Woodpecker

There are three guys in a helicopter and they each get to choose what they want to throw out.

The first guys chooses an apple. So he takes an apple and throws it out.

The second guy chooses a brick. So he takes a brick and throws it out.

The third guy chooses a grenade. So he pulls the pin and throws it out.

They land a while later and are walking along when they find a man rubbing his head.

They ask, “What happened to you?”

He answers, “An apple hit me on the head.”

They’re walking along again and find a man lying unconscious on the ground.

They ask the cop, “What happened to him?”

He answers, “A brick hit him on the head.”

They’re walking again, when they find a man laughing hysterically.

They ask, “What happened to you?”

He answers, “I farted and the house blew up behind me!”

Interesting Fact: In winter Downy Woodpeckers are frequent members of mixed species flocks. Advantages of flocking include having to spend less time watching out for predators and better luck finding food from having other birds around. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Downy_Woodpecker/lifehistory )

So What’s So Great About Bing On-Line?!

monk-parakeets-online

F/6.3, 1/640, ISO 200.

Monk Parakeets

What is a parrot’s favorite game?

Hide and Speak!

Interesting Fact: In their native Argentina, Monk Parakeets sometimes adopt old nests of other species. Some ornithologists have suggested that this behavior may have been the first step, evolutionarily speaking, to transitioning from nesting in tree cavities to constructing stick nests. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Monk_Parakeet/lifehistory )