Because I’m Bad, I’m Bad, Really, Really Bad

Common Grackle 1

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 320.

Common Grackle  

A guy walks into an antique store and buys a grandfather clock, he walks out of the shop with it and accidentally walks into a drunk guy. (they both fall over and the clock gets smashed to bits)
The guy says to the drunk, “Why don’t you watch where your going?” and the drunk says, “Why don’t you carry a wrist watch like everybody else?”

Interesting Fact: You might see a Common Grackle hunched over on the ground, wings spread, letting ants crawl over its body and feathers. This is called anting, and grackles are frequent practitioners among the many bird species that do it. The ants secrete formic acid, the chemical in their stings, and this may rid the bird of parasites. In addition to ants, grackles have been seen using walnut juice, lemons and limes, marigold blossoms, chokecherries, and mothballs in a similar fashion. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Common_Grackle/lifehistory )

Baby Let’s Fly Away

sunset flight

F/9.0, 1/1250, ISO 100.

A day without sunshine is like, well, night.

Interesting Fact: Neglecting atmospheric refraction and the Sun’s non-zero size, whenever and wherever sunset occurs, it is always in the northwest quadrant from the March equinox to the September equinox, and in the southwest quadrant from the September equinox to the March equinox. Sunsets occur almost exactly due west on the equinoxes for all viewers on Earth. Exact calculations of the azimuths of sunset on other dates are complex, but they can be estimated with reasonable accuracy by using the analemma. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sunset#Historically )

I Always Have To Deal With Paparazzis

White-Tailed Deer 1

F/5.6, 1/50, ISO 100.

White-Tailed Deer

Who did Bambi invite to his birthday party?

His nearest and deer-est friends.

Interesting Fact: White-tailed deer, the smallest members of the North American deer family, are found from southern Canada to South America. In the heat of summer they typically inhabit fields and meadows using clumps of broad-leaved and coniferous forests for shade. During the winter they generally keep to forests, preferring coniferous stands that provide shelter from the harsh elements. ( http://animals.nationalgeographic.com/animals/mammals/white-tailed-deer/ )

This Is A Private Area No Peeking!

Red-Eared Slider Turtle 1

F/5.6, 1/200, ISO 100.

Red-Eared Slider Turtle

What do you get when you cross a turtle and a flu shot?

A slow-poke.

Interesting Fact: The red-eared slider (Trachemys scripta elegans), also known as the red-eared terrapin, is a semiaquatic turtle belonging to the family Emydidae. It is a subspecies of the pond slider. It is the most popular pet turtle in the United States and is also popular as a pet in the rest of the world.[2] It has, therefore, become the most commonly traded turtle in the world.[3] It is native to the southern United States and northern Mexico, but has become established in other places because of pet releases, and has become an invasive species in many areas, where it outcompetes native species. The red-eared slider is included in the list of the world’s 100 most invasive species[4] published by the IUCN. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red-eared_slider )

 

Go Away! I’m Really Focused Here

Great Blue Heron 3

F/7.1, 1/800, ISO 200.

Great Blue Heron

Two neighbors are talking to each other.
First neighbor: Do you know that my dog is so smart, he waits for the newspaper to drop at the doorstep and then delivers it to me?
Second neighbor: Of course, I know that very well.
First neighbor: Really, well then, how?
Second neighbor: My dog came and told me.

Interesting Fact: Great Blue Herons congregate at fish hatcheries, creating potential problems for the fish farmers. A study found that herons ate mostly diseased fish that would have died shortly anyway. Sick fish spent more time near the surface of the water where they were more vulnerable to the herons.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Great_Blue_Heron/lifehistory )

Can’t Touch Me!

Black-crowned Night-Heron

F/6.3, 1/250 ISO 100.

Black-crowned Night-Heron

Why was the math textbook so sad?

He had a lot of problems!

Interesting Fact: Young Black-crowned Night-Herons leave the nest at the age of 1 month but cannot fly until they are 6 weeks old. They move through the vegetation on foot, joining up in foraging flocks at night. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Black-crowned_Night-Heron/lifehistory )

Why Wasn’t I Casted In The “Angry Bird” Movie?!

Chipping Sparrow 1

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 100.

Chipping Sparrow 

Bob: You know Tom, sometimes I don’t understand life.
Tom: What do you mean?
Bob: When we were a younger, we learnt to talk and to walk. At school, we always have to sit down and shut up…

Interesting Fact: In much of the West, Chipping Sparrows disperse shortly after breeding to move to areas with better food resources. It’s not unusual to see Chipping Sparrows on alpine tundra or along roadsides in open grasslands. This results in the common misperception that they bred in those areas, when really they simply moved there to molt. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Chipping_Sparrow/lifehistory )

I Shall Give You Light!

Sandy Hook Light

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 100.

Sandy Hook Light

What’s the difference between a lighthouse keeper and a jeweler?

One watches seas, and the other sees watches.

Interesting Fact: The light was built to aid mariners entering the southern end of the New York Harbor. It was originally called New York Lighthouse because it was funded through a New York Assembly lottery and a tax on all ships entering the Port of New York. The lighthouse has endured an attempt to destroy it as an aid to British navigation by Benjamin Tupper,[5] and a subsequent occupancy of British soldiers during the Revolutionary War.  ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sandy_Hook_Light )

That Will Sting!

hornets

F/ 5.6, 1/500, ISO 400.

Hornets

Wife: “What are you doing?”
Husband : Nothing.
Wife : “Nothing…? You’ve been reading our marriage
certificate for an hour.”
Husband : “I was looking for the expiration date.”

Interesting Fact: Hornets (insects in the genera Vespa and Provespa) are the largest of the eusocial wasps, and are similar in appearance to their close relatives yellow jackets. Some species can reach up to 5.5 cm (2.2 in) in length. They are distinguished from other vespine wasps by the relatively large top margin of the head and by the rounded segment of the abdomen just behind the waist. Worldwide, there are 22 recognized species of Vespa,[1] and three species of Provespa, which are unique amongst hornets in being nocturnal.[2] Most species only occur in the tropics of Asia, though the European hornet (Vespa crabro), is widely distributed throughout Europe, Russia, North America and Northeast Asia. Wasps native to North America in the genus Dolichovespula are commonly referred to as hornets (e.g. baldfaced hornets), but are actually yellowjackets. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hornet )

Bee Mine!

bee

F/ 8.0, 1/200, ISO 100.

Bumblebee

Why did the bee get married?

Because he found his honey

Interesting Fact: Queen hibernates during the winter and starts laying eggs in the spring. She lays 8 to 12 eggs at a time. Young bumblebees emerge after 21 days.  ( http://www.softschools.com/facts/animals/bumblebee_facts/582/ )