I Have A Funny Feeling It’s Going To Be One Of Those Days!

F/5.6, 1/125, ISO 250.

Black Vulture

A farmer goes out and buys a new, young rooster. As soon as he brings him home, the
young rooster rushes and screws all 150 of the farmers hens. The farmer is impressed.
At lunchtime, the young rooster again screws all 150 hens. The farmer is not just impressed anymore,he is worried. Next morning,not only is the rooster screwin…g the hens but he is screwing the turkeys,ducks even the cow.
Later farmer looks out into the barnyard and finds the rooster stretched out, limp as a rag, his eyes closed, dead and vultures circling overhead.
The farmer runs out, looks down at the young roosters limp body and says: “You deserved it, you horny bastard!”
And the young rooster opens one eye, points up at the vultures with his wing, and says, Shhhh!,they are about to land.”

Interesting Fact: One-on-one at a carcass, Black Vultures lose out to the slightly larger Turkey Vulture. But flocks of Black Vultures can quickly take over a carcass and drive the more solitary Turkey Vultures away. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Black_Vulture/lifehistory )

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Come Swim With Me!

F/5.6, 1/500, ISO 250.

Horned Grebe

What is a witch’s favorite subject in school?

Spelling.

Interesting Fact:  Like most grebes, the small chicks of the Horned Grebe frequently ride on the backs of their swimming parents. The young ride between the wings on the parent’s back, and may even go underwater with them during dives. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Horned_Grebe/lifehistory )

I always have been so busy drinking the nectar, that I’ve never taken the time to smell the flowers.

F/5.6, 1/125, ISO 800.

Butterfly

Why don’t skeletons fight each other?

They don’t have the guts.

Interesting Fact: Butterflies can taste with their feet. They have six lets and they each have sensors on them that can tell just by landing on a flower what it taste like. ( http://www.whatdobutterflieseat.info )

I Think I’m In Love. No Wait, I Was Just Hungry.

F/11.0,1/500, ISO 800.

Bananaquit

What do you call a laughing motorcycle?

“Yamahahaha”

Interesting Fact: The bananaquit has a slender, curved bill, adapted to taking nectar from flowers. It sometimes pierces flowers from the side, taking the nectar without pollinating the plant.[18] It also feeds on sweet juices by puncturing fruit with its beak, and will eat small insects on occasion. While feeding, the bananaquit must always perch as it cannot hover like a hummingbird. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bananaquit )

Caution Chicks At Play! 

F/5.6, 1/1000, ISO 200.

Wild Turkeys Chicks

What did the mama turkey say to her naughty son?

If your papa could see you now, he’d turn over in his gravy!

Interesting Fact: Male Wild Turkeys provide no parental care. Newly hatched chicks follow the female, who feeds them for a few days until they learn to find food on their own. As the chicks grow, they band into groups composed of several hens and their broods. Winter groups sometimes exceed 200 turkeys. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Wild_Turkey/lifehistory )

Duuun-Dunn-Dunn-Duh-Duh-Duh-Nuh-Nuh-Nuh-Nuuh!!!

F/5.6, 1/500, ISO 250.

Shark Week 

American Coot

Spiny Dogfish Shark

Why do sharks make terrible lawyers?

They’re too nice!

Interesting Fact: Although it swims like a duck, the American Coot does not have webbed feet like a duck. Instead, each one of the coot’s long toes has broad lobes of skin that help it kick through the water. The broad lobes fold back each time the bird lifts its foot, so it doesn’t impede walking on dry land, though it supports the bird’s weight on mucky ground. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/American_Coot )

In A World Full Of Fish Be A Shark

Shark Week 

F/5.6, 1/500, ISO 360.

Spiny Dogfish Shark

What did the seal with the broken arm say to the shark?

Do not consume if seal is broken.

Interesting Fact: This shark is known to hunt in packs that can range up into the thousands. They are aggressive hunters and have a sizable diet that can range from squid, fish, crab, jellyfish, sea cucumber, shrimp and other invertebrates. ( https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spiny_dogfish )

Shhhh… I’m Hiding From Stupid People!

F/5.6, 1/500, ISO 200.

Great Egret 

Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

It was a high school.

Interesting Fact: The male builds a nest platform from long sticks and twigs before pairing up with a female, and then both members of the pair may collaborate to complete the nest, though the male sometimes finishes it himself. The nest is up to 3 feet across and 1 foot deep. It is lined with pliable plant material that dries to form a cup structure. They don’t typically reuse nests from year to year. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Great_Egret/lifehistory )

I’ll Eat You Up I Love You So!

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 500.

Bananaquit

What did the guitar say to the guitarist?

Pick on someone your own size!

Interesting Fact: Bananaquits build nests with side entrance holes. Several nests may be built, with some used only as sleeping quarters. ( http://identify.whatbird.com/obj/1014/overview/Bananaquit.aspx )

INCOMING!!!

F/5.6, 1/500, ISO 200.

Elegant Tern

What happened when a faucet, a tomato and lettuce were in a race?

The lettuce was ahead, the faucet was running and the tomato was trying to ketchup.

Interesting Fact: Approximately 90-97% of all Elegant Terns nest in one colony on Isla Rasa in the Gulf of California, Mexico. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Elegant_Tern/lifehistory )