Don’t Make Me Walk When I Want To Fly!

F/13.0, 1/640, ISO 250.

Red-tailed Hawk

How do trees access the internet?

They log in.

Interesting Fact: Red-tailed Hawks occupy just about every type of open habitat on the continent. This includes desert, scrublands, grasslands, roadsides, fields and pastures, parks, broken woodland, and (in Mexico) tropical rainforest. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Red-tailed_Hawk/lifehistory )

Flying High, High, I’m The Bird In The Sky!

F/13.0, 1/640, ISO 250.

Osprey

What did the fish say when he swam into the wall?

Dam!

Interesting Fact: Ospreys are unusual among hawks in possessing a reversible outer toe that allows them to grasp with two toes in front and two behind. Barbed pads on the soles of the birds’ feet help them grip slippery fish. When flying with prey, an Osprey lines up its catch head first for less wind resistance.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Osprey/lifehistory )

I May Look Calm, But In My Head I’ve Killed You 3 Times.

F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 200.

Osprey

What do lawyers wear to court?

Lawsuits!

Interesting Fact: The Osprey readily builds its nest on manmade structures, such as telephone poles, channel markers, duck blinds, and nest platforms designed especially for it. Such platforms have become an important tool in reestablishing Ospreys in areas where they had disappeared. In some areas nests are placed almost exclusively on artificial structures. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Osprey/lifehistory )

I’m Not Lazy, I’m Just On My Energy Saving Mode!

F/6.3, 1/125, ISO 250.

Red-tailed Hawk 

How did the tree feel in the spring?

Releaved.

Interesting Fact: Red-tailed Hawks typically put their nests in the crowns of tall trees where they have a commanding view of the landscape. They may also nest on a cliff ledge or on artificial structures such as window ledges and billboard platforms. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Red-tailed_Hawk/lifehistory )

 

Finding A Needle In The Haystack

F/11.0 , 1/500, ISO 320.

Northern Harrier

Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.

Interesting Fact: Northern Harriers usually fly slowly and low over the ground, their wings held in a V-shape as they glide. Most males have either one mate or two mates at a time, but some have up to five mates when food is abundant. Each male courts females and advertises his territory by performing sky-dancing displays: undulating, rollercoaster-like flights up to 1,000 feet off the ground, sometimes covering more than half a mile. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Northern_Harrier/lifehistory )

 

 

It’s Much Easier Sitting Down In The Chair..

F/6.3, 1/60, ISO 1250.

Bald Eagle

What is the difference between a good lawyer and a great lawyer?

A good lawyer knows the law and a great lawyer knows the judge!

Interesting Fact: Bald Eagles are powerful fliers—soaring, gliding, and flapping over long distances. In one of several spectacular courtship displays, a male and female fly high into the sky, lock talons, and cartwheel downward together, breaking off at the last instant to avoid crashing to earth. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Bald_Eagle/lifehistory )

I Give High A New Meaning!

F/13.0, 1/640, ISO 320.

Northern Harrier

What did the eggs say when the cops showed up?

Everybody scramble!

Interesting Fact: Northern Harriers hunt mostly small mammals and small birds, but they are capable of taking bigger prey like rabbits and ducks. They sometimes subdue larger animals by drowning them. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Northern_Harrier )

I’m Watching You!

F/11.0, 1/500, ISO 400.

Red-tailed Hawk

What’s the difference between the dinosaur and a dragon?

Dinosaurs are too young to SMOKE!

Interesting Fact: Red-tailed Hawks have been seen hunting as a pair, guarding opposite sides of the same tree to catch tree squirrels. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Red-tailed_Hawk/overview )

Blue You Away!

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 250.

Blue Jay 

Why do ghosts have so much trouble dating?

Women can see right through them.

Interesting Fact: This common, large songbird is familiar to many people, with its perky crest; blue, white, gray, and black plumage; and noisy calls. Blue Jays are known for their intelligence and complex social systems, and have tight family bonds. They often mate for life, remaining with their social mate throughout the year. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Blue_Jay/lifehistory )

 

I Have A Funny Feeling It’s Going To Be One Of Those Days!

F/5.6, 1/125, ISO 250.

Black Vulture

A farmer goes out and buys a new, young rooster. As soon as he brings him home, the
young rooster rushes and screws all 150 of the farmers hens. The farmer is impressed.
At lunchtime, the young rooster again screws all 150 hens. The farmer is not just impressed anymore,he is worried. Next morning,not only is the rooster screwin…g the hens but he is screwing the turkeys,ducks even the cow.
Later farmer looks out into the barnyard and finds the rooster stretched out, limp as a rag, his eyes closed, dead and vultures circling overhead.
The farmer runs out, looks down at the young roosters limp body and says: “You deserved it, you horny bastard!”
And the young rooster opens one eye, points up at the vultures with his wing, and says, Shhhh!,they are about to land.”

Interesting Fact: One-on-one at a carcass, Black Vultures lose out to the slightly larger Turkey Vulture. But flocks of Black Vultures can quickly take over a carcass and drive the more solitary Turkey Vultures away. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Black_Vulture/lifehistory )