When Butterflies Fall In Love, Do They Feel Humans In Their Stomach?

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Butterfly

What did the grape say when it was stepped on?

Nothing, it just let out a little wine.

Interesting Fact:  Butterflies are insects in the macrolepidopteranclade Rhopalocera from the orderLepidoptera, which also includes moths. Adult butterflies have large, often brightly coloured wings, and conspicuous, fluttering flight. The group comprises the large superfamilyPapilionoidea, which contains at least one former group, the skippers (formerly the superfamily “Hesperioidea”) and the most recent analyses suggest it also contains the moth-butterflies (formerly the superfamily “Hedyloidea”). Butterfly fossils date to the Paleocene, which was about 56 million years ago.  ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Butterfly )

Wazzaap!

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Turkey Vulture ( Juvenile )

Why are hairdressers never late for work?

Because they know all the short cuts!

Interesting Fact: Outside of the breeding season, Turkey Vultures form roosts of dozens to a hundred individuals. When Turkey Vultures court, pairs perform a “follow flight” display where one bird leads the other through twisting, turning, and flapping flights for a minute or so, repeated over periods as long as 3 hours. Migrating flocks can number in the thousands. At carcasses, several Turkey Vultures may gather but typically only one feeds at a time, chasing the others off and making them wait their turn. Despite their size, Turkey Vultures are often driven off by smaller Black Vultures, Crested Caracaras, Zone-tailed Hawks, and other species. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Turkey_Vulture/lifehistory )

I Am On A Seafood Diet. I See Food, And I Eat It.

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Turkey Vulture

Two vultures are in a field, eating a dead clown.

One vulture says to the other, “Does this taste funny to you?”

Interesting Fact:  Turkey Vultures nest in rock crevices, caves, ledges, thickets, mammal burrows and hollow logs, fallen trees, abandoned hawk or heron nests, and abandoned buildings. These nest sites are typically much cooler (by 13°F or more) than surroundings, and isolated from human traffic or disturbance. While they often feed near humans, Turkey Vultures prefer to nest far away from civilization. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Turkey_Vulture/lifehistory )

Chill The Fox Out!

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Red Fox

Why did the man lose his job at the orange juice factory?

He couldn’t concentrate!

Interesting Fact: In winter, foxes meet to mate. The vixen (female) typically gives birth to a litter of 2 to 12 pups. At birth, red foxes are actually brown or gray. A new red coat usually grows in by the end of the first month, but some red foxes are golden, reddish-brown, silver, or even black. Both parents care for their young through the summer before they are able to strike out on their own in the fall. ( https://www.nationalgeographic.com/animals/mammals/r/red-fox/ )

Bambi

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White-Tailed Deer Fawns

What do you call a deer with no eyes?

I have no I-Deer

Interesting Fact: At birth, white tail fawns have a spotted reddish coat that is fairly silky. There may be several hundred spots on the coat. The spots enable the fawn to camouflage itself, with the colors blending well with the surrounding natural environment. They usually weigh between 4 to 8 pounds at birth. The whitetail fawn loses its spots by the end of October of the same year it was born, or within 3 to 4 months after birth.  ( http://www.the-whitetail-deer.com/whitetail-deer-fawns.html )

I Might Be Too Punk Rock For You.

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Pileated Woodpecker 

When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you’re a mouse.

Interesting Fact: When hammering into this soft wood, Pileated Woodpeckers use their long necks to pull far back from the tree, then make powerful strikes with their heavy bills, pulling with their feet to increase the strength of the blow. The sound is often audible as a heavy thunk, and large chips of wood collect on the ground below. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Pileated_Woodpecker/lifehistory )

Blow Me

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Dandelion ( Taraxacum )

What did the alien dandelion say to the earthly dandelion?

Take me to your weader!

Interesting Fact: Dandelions are thought to have evolved about 30 million years ago in Eurasia.[18]Fossil seeds of †Taraxacum tanaiticum have been recorded from the Pliocene of southern Russia.[19] Dandelions have been used by humans for food and as a herb for much of recorded history.[20] “They were well known to ancient Egyptians, Greeks and Romans, and have been used in Chinese traditional medicine for over a thousand years. Dandelions probably arrived in North America on the Mayflower – not as stowaways, but brought on purpose for their medicinal benefits,” according to the Maine Organic Farmers and Gardeners Association. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Taraxacum#History )

You Really CHANGED!

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Butterfly

What’s the secret to telling a good postman joke?

It’s all in the delivery

Interesting Fact: Butterflies feed primarily on nectar from flowers. Some also derive nourishment from pollen,[54] tree sap, rotting fruit, dung, decaying flesh, and dissolved minerals in wet sand or dirt. Butterflies are important as pollinators for some species of plants. In general, they do not carry as much pollen load as bees, but they are capable of moving pollen over greater distances.[55] Flower constancy has been observed for at least one species of butterfly. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Butterfly )

 

What Am I Going To Do Today?

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Eastern Chipmunk

Why did the tiny ghost join the football team?

He heard they needed a little team spirit.

Interesting Fact: It has several bird-like or chattering calls; one is a trill at the rate of 130 vibrations per minute and another is a lower-pitched, clicking sound. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eastern_chipmunk )

I Have Been Thinking To Buy A Drill.

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Northern Flicker 

What is a mattress’ favorite season?

Spring.

Interesting Fact: Northern Flickers usually excavate nest holes in dead or diseased tree trunks or large branches. In northern North America look for nests in trembling aspens, which are susceptible to a heartrot that makes for easy excavation. Unlike many woodpeckers, flickers often reuse cavities that they or another species excavated in a previous year. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Northern_Flicker/lifehistory )