Life Is Like A Cactus, Full Of Pricks, But Also Very Beautiful.

F/8.0, 1/250, ISO 250.

Loggerhead Shrike

What is a soldiers least favorite month of the year?

March

Interesting Fact: Loggerhead Shrikes impale noxious prey such as monarch butterflies and eastern narrow-mouthed toads—then wait for up to three days to eat them, which allows time for the poisons to break down. These shrikes also eat the heads and abdomens of toxic lubber grasshoppers, while discarding the insect’s poisonous thorax. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Loggerhead_Shrike )

 

 

Be Your Self Everyone Else Is Already Taken!

F/6.3, 1/400, ISO 1600.

Hooded Merganser ( Male )

Did you hear that all the toilets at the police station were stolen?

Yeah… the cops got nothing to go on.

Interesting Fact: Hooded Merganser ducklings leave their nest cavity within 24 hours of hatching. First, their mother checks the area around the nest and calls to the nestlings from ground level. From inside the nest, the little fluffballs scramble up to the entrance hole and then flutter to the ground, which may be 50 feet or more below them. In some cases they have to walk half a mile or more with their mother to the nearest body of water. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Hooded_Merganser )

I Am Coming For You!

F/11.0, 1/500, ISO 400.

Ruddy Duck ( Juvenile ) 

Why are elephants such poor dancers?

Because they have two left feet.

Interesting Fact: Ruddy Ducks get harassed by Horned Grebes, Pied-billed Grebes, and American Coots during the breeding season. The grebes sometimes attack Ruddy Ducks from below the water, a behavior known as “submarining.” ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Ruddy_Duck )

Admit It. You’re Waiting For Something You Know Won’t Happen.

F/6.3, 1/500, ISO 800.

Merlin

What do you get if you cross LSD with birth control?

A trip without the kids!

Interesting Fact: The name “Merlin” comes from esmerillon, the old French name for the species. Merlins used to be called “pigeon hawks” because in flight they look somewhat pigeon-like. Their species name, columbarius, is also a reference to pigeons.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Merlin )

 

 

Go Ahead… Make My Day!

F/6.3, 1/500, ISO 250.

Hooded Merganser ( Female )

What insect runs away from everything?

A flea!

Interesting Fact: Once a female begins incubating eggs her mate abandons her, and it’s not known if they reunite the following season. Incubating females may use a broken-wing display to protect eggs or nestlings from raccoons, mink, black rat snakes, black bears, pine martens, European Starlings, Northern Flickers, Red-headed Woodpeckers, and Red-bellied Woodpeckers. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Hooded_Merganser/lifehistory )

 

Dear Life, When I Said ” Can My Day Get Any Worst” It Was A Rhetorical Question Not A Challenge.

F/6.3, 1/250, ISO 800.

White-Tailed Deer ( Fawn )

Which branch of the military do babies join?

The infantry!

Interesting Fact: White tailed deer can run as fast as 36 mph, jump as high as 8 1/2 feet, and leap as far as 30 feet. They are also very good swimmers. ( https://www.brighthub.com/environment/science-environmental/articles/48142.aspx )

 

 

If You Can’t Convince Them, Confuse Them.

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Brant

What kind of shoes do you make with banana skins?

Slippers!

Interesting Fact: The Brant is also known as the Brent Goose. The spelling “Brant” is the original one, with “Brent” being a later folk-etymological idea that it was derived from a classical Greek water bird name brenthos. It actually came from the guttural call note of the species. ( http://identify.whatbird.com/obj/290/overview/Brant.aspx )

 

 

When I Was Born I Was So Surprised I Didn’t Talk For A Year And Half

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White-throated Sparrow

What do you call a fake noodle?

An Impasta

Interesting Fact:  White-throated Sparrows eat mainly the seeds of grasses and weeds, including ragweed and buckwheat, as well as fruits of sumac, grape, cranberry, mountain ash, rose, blueberry, blackberry, and dogwood. In summer they eat large numbers of insects that they catch on the forest floor or, occasionally on quick flights out from low vegetation. These include dragonflies, wasps, stinkbugs, beetles, flies, and caterpillars, as well as spiders, millipedes, centipedes, and snails. Parents feed their nestlings almost exclusively animal matter. During winter, White-throated Sparrows readily visit bird feeders for millet and black oil sunflower seeds. In spring they eat the tender buds, blossoms, and young seeds of oak, apple, maple, beech, and elm. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/White-throated_Sparrow/lifehistory )

 

 

In Three Words I Can Sum Up Everything I’ve Learned About Life. IT GOES ON.

F/6.3, 1/640, ISO 200.

Canvesback

What do you call it when you have your Grandma on speed dial?

Instagram

Interesting Fact: Canvasbacks are social outside of the breeding season; they gather in large rafts by the thousands to tens of thousands. Only when winter food is scarce or clumped do they defend foraging areas against other Canvasbacks. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Canvasback/lifehistory )

 

 

Life Is Better When You’re Laughing

F/11.0, 1/500, ISO 320.

Laughing Gull  

Why do hamburgers go to the gym?

To get better buns

Interesting Fact: The Laughing Gull is normally diurnal, or active during the day. During the breeding season it forages at night as well. It usually looks for food along the beach at night, but will also hover to catch insects around lights. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Laughing_Gull/lifehistory )