50 Shades Of Red In My Eyes

F/ 6.3, 1/640, ISO 200.

Canvasback 

What type of book has only characters and no story?

A telephone book.

Interesting Fact: A large diving duck, the Canvasback breeds in prairie potholes and winters on ocean bays. Its sloping profile distinguishes it from other ducks. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Canvasback/id )

Double Trouble!

Mute Swan

F/ 5.6, 1/1250, ISO 400.

Mute Swan 

What did the nose say to the finger?

Stop picking on me. 

Interesting Fact: The Mute Swan is reported to mate for life. However, changing of mates does occur infrequently, and swans will remate if their partner dies. If a male loses his mate and pairs with a young female, she joins him on his territory. If he mates with an older female, they go to hers. If a female loses her mate, she remates quickly and usually chooses a younger male.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Mute_Swan/lifehistory )

Muddy Quack!

F/6.3, 1/250, ISO 450.

Northern Pintail Duck

What day do fish hate?

Fry-day!

Interesting Fact: The Northern Pintail is among the earliest nesting ducks in North America, beginning shortly after ice-out in many northern areas. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Northern_Pintail/lifehistory )

I Can Walk On Water!

F/13.0, 1/640, ISO 320.

Ring-billed Gull

Two Police officers are talking:

A naked women robbed a bank.

Nobody could remember her face.

Interesting Fact: Ring-billed Gulls near Tampa Bay, Florida, became accustomed to feasting on garbage at an open landfill site. Then, in 1983, operators replaced the dumping grounds with closed incinerators. The thwarted scavengers found themselves another open dump, but the pattern continues all across the gull’s range. When waste-management practices shift from open landfills to closed incinerators, gull numbers often drop. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Ring-billed_Gull/lifehistory )

Splash Down!

F/8.0, 1/2000, ISO 800.

Common Merganser 

Why was the math book so sad?

It had a lot of problems.

Interesting Fact: Common Mergansers spend much of their time afloat, loafing, fishing, and often sleeping on open water. They may form flocks of up to 75 individuals. They often swim in small groups along the shoreline, dipping their heads underwater to search for prey and then diving with a slight leap. Often when one bird dives in a large group, the others follow the leader and disappear. ( Common Merganser Life History, All About Birds, Cornell Lab of Ornithology )

 

 

Believe You Can And You’re Halfway There.

F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 400.

Dark-eyed Junco

Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

In case he got a hole in one.

Interesting Fact: The female chooses the nest site, typically in a depression or niche on sloping ground, rock face, or amid the tangled roots of an upturned tree. Around people, juncos may nest in or underneath buildings. Occasionally, juncos nest above the ground on horizontal branches (rarely as high as 45 feet), window ledges, and in hanging flower pots or light fixtures. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Dark-eyed_Junco/lifehistory )

I Solemnly Swear I Am Up To No Good!

F/9.0, 1/125, ISO 320.

Black-crowned Night-Heron

Guest at a restaurant: “I refuse to eat this roast beef. Please call the manager! “

Waiter: “That’s no use. He won’t eat it either.”

Interesting Fact: Black-crowned Night Heron nest in groups that often include other species, including herons, egrets, and ibises. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Black-crowned_Night-Heron )

He Went Thataway!

F/8.0, 1/250, ISO 320.

White-breasted Nuthatch

A wife complains to her husband: “Just look at that couple down the road, how lovely they are. He keeps holding her hand, kissing her, holding the door for her, why can’t you do the same?”

The husband: “Are you mad? I barely know the woman!”

Interesting Fact: White-breasted Nuthatches live in pairs year round and chase other nuthatches from their territory. Agitated birds fan their tails, flick their wings, or raise the feathers of the back. A bird backing down from a confrontation typically raises its bill and tail, and droops its wings. In winter White-breasted Nuthatches join groups of chickadees, titmice, and woodpeckers to forage.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/White-breasted_Nuthatch/lifehistory#behavior

Don’t Stick Your Nose Where It Doesn’t Belong

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 320.

Northern Pintail Duck

Father and son are talking over dinner in a nice restaurant.  A boy asks his father, “Dad, are bugs good to eat?”

“That’s disgusting. Don’t talk about things like that over dinner,” the dad replies.

After dinner the father asks, “Now, son, what did you want to ask me?”

“Oh, nothing,” the boy says. “There was a bug in your soup, but now it’s gone.”

Interesting Fact: Northern Pintails migrate at night at speeds around 48 miles per hour. The longest nonstop flight recorded for a Northern Pintail was 1,800 miles. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Northern_Pintail/

Don’t Confuse Me With Twitter!

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 400.

Blue Jay

What do you get when you cross and smurf and a cow?

Blue cheese!

Interesting Fact: The black bridle across the face, nape, and throat varies extensively and may help Blue Jays recognize one another. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Blue_Jay/lifehistory