So Cold Outside I Just Farted Snowflakes!

F/13.0, 1/640, ISO 640.

Carolina Wren

Those, who go to sleep late, are called owls.
Those, who wake up early, are called larks.
And those, who go to  sleep late and wake up early, are called Angry Birds.

Interesting Fact: The Carolina Wren is sensitive to cold weather, with the northern populations decreasing markedly after severe winters. The gradually increasing winter temperatures over the last century may have been responsible for the northward range expansion seen in the mid-1900s. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Carolina_Wren/lifehistory )

Don’t Be Afraid To Stick Your Neck Out!

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 100.

Mute Swan

What did one potato chip say to the other?

Shall we go for a dip?

Interesting Fact: Short legs placed well back on the body give Mute Swans an awkward walking gait, but the birds can run quickly if pursued and can take off from land and water, flying with head and neck extended. On the water they sometimes hold their wings slightly raised and “sail” with the wind. Mute Swans are predominantly monogamous and form long-lasting breeding pairs. They are extremely aggressive in defending their breeding territory. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Mute_Swan/lifehistory )

Everything In Your Life Is Reflection Of A Choice You Have Made, If You Want A Difrent Result, Make A Different Choice.

F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 320, Photoshop CS6.

Mute Swan

A pirate was on his ship and his watchman comes to him and says, “1 enemy ship on the horizont.”

The captain says, “Bring me my red shirt, no men get injured or die.”

So the watchman comes to him and asks, “Why did you want your red shirt?”

The captain says, “Because if i get injured they won’t see and keep on fighting.”

So the watchman comes to him again and says, “20 enemy ships on the horizont.”

The captain says, “Bring me my brown pants.”

Interesting Fact:  Mute Swans can adapt to degraded habitat and actually benefit from the spread of the invasive common reed Phragmites australis, which flourishes in disturbed sites. As the reeds spread into lakes and ponds, the swans can build nests farther offshore in the reed beds, where they’re safer from egg predators. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Mute_Swan/lifehistory )

We Are Online Now.

F/7.1, 1/800, ISO 200.

Monk Parakeets

Where does a bee keep his stinger?

In his honey!

Interesting Fact: Monk Parakeets spend a lot of time preening each other. These long-lived birds form socially monogamous pairs, and courtship involves a pair preening each other and grasping each other by the beak while shaking their heads.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Monk_Parakeet/lifehistory )

Life Is So Much Easier When You Just Chill Out.

F/8.0, 1/250, ISO 400.

Carolina Wren

One day, during a lesson on proper grammar, the teacher asked for a show of hands from those who could use the word “beautiful” in the same sentence twice. First, she called on little Suzie, who responded with, “My father bought my mother a beautiful dress and she looked beautiful in it.”

“Very good, Suzie,” replied the teacher. She then called on little Michael. “My mommy planned a beautiful banquet and it turned out beautifully,” he said.

“Excellent, Michael!”

Then, the teacher called on Little Johnny. “Last night, at the dinner table, my sister told my father that she was pregnant, and he said, ‘Beautiful, …just #$&#*&^# beautiful!

Interesting Fact: One captive male Carolina Wren sang nearly 3,000 times in a single day. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Carolina_Wren/lifehistory )

I Am As Low As Your Lowrider!

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 250.

Carolina Wren 

How do you drown a Hipster?

In the mainstream.

Interesting Fact: They are known to build multiple nests to confuse predators. ( http://identify.whatbird.com/obj/677/overview/Carolina_Wren.aspx )

 

Away With You…. PHEASANT.

ring-necked-pheasant

F/6.3, 1/500, ISO 1100.

Ring-Necked Pheasant

A pheasant says to a bull, “I would love to get on top of that tree, but I haven’t the energy.”

“Well,” says the bull, “why don’t you eat some of my dung? It’s packed with nutrients.”

So the pheasant eats some dung and finds that it gives him enough energy to get to the first branch. The next day, he eats some more and gets to the next branch. This cycle continues for a week. Finally, the pheasant is at the top of the tree, where he is spotted by the farmer, who shoots him with a shotgun.

Moral of the Story: bullsh*t might take you to the top, but it won’t keep you there.

Interesting Fact: While the birds normally don’t cover more than about 600 feet at a time, strong winds can extend their flights considerably. Observers in 1941 reported seeing a pheasant fly a record four miles while crossing a body of water. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Ring-necked_Pheasant/lifehistory )

Swim At Your Own Risk

mute-swan-swimming

F/5.6, 1/125, ISO 320.

Mute Swan

Why did the teacher jump into the water?

She wanted to test the water!

Interesting Fact: The black knob at the base of the male Mute Swan’s bill swells during the breeding season and becomes noticeably larger than the female’s. The rest of the year the difference between the sexes is not obvious.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Mute_Swan/lifehistory )

Today I Will Be Happier Than A Bird With A French Fry!

F/8.0, 1/250, ISO 250.

Carolina Wren

What did one plate say to the other?

Dinners on me.

Interesting Fact: Carolina Wrens nest in open cavities 3–6 feet off the ground, in trees, overhangs and stumps. The first nest is sometimes built on vegetation-shaded ground. Near homes, they’re versatile nesters, making use of discarded flowerpots, mailboxes, propane-tank covers, and a variety of other items. Their nests have even been found in old coat pockets and boots. Males often build multiple nests before the pair makes a final selection. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Carolina_Wren/lifehistory )

Double Trouble!

Mute Swan

F/ 5.6, 1/1250, ISO 400.

Mute Swan 

What did the nose say to the finger?

Stop picking on me. 

Interesting Fact: The Mute Swan is reported to mate for life. However, changing of mates does occur infrequently, and swans will remate if their partner dies. If a male loses his mate and pairs with a young female, she joins him on his territory. If he mates with an older female, they go to hers. If a female loses her mate, she remates quickly and usually chooses a younger male.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Mute_Swan/lifehistory )