Well I’m going down, down, down, down, down, down.

mallard-landing

F/6.0, 1/500, ISO 360.

Mallard  

A Ham sandwich walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink.

The bartender says, “Sorry we don’t serve food.”

Interesting Fact:  The Mallard is the ancestor of nearly all domestic duck breeds (everything except the Muscovy Duck). Domestic ducks can be common in city ponds and can be confusing to identify—they may lack the white neck ring, show white on the chest, be all dark, or show oddly shaped crests on the head. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Mallard/lifehistory )

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Be Different!

F/5.6, 1/500, ISO 360.

Western-Grebe

Why did the traffic light turn red?

You would too if you had to change in the middle of the street!

Interesting Fact:  The Western Grebe, like other grebes, spends almost all its time in water and is very awkward when on land. The legs are so far back on the body that walking is very difficult. Western Grebes are adept swimmers and divers. Courtship happens entirely in the water, including a well-known display known as “rushing,” where two birds turn to one side, lunge forward in synchrony, their bodies completely out of the water, and race across the water side by side with their necks curved gracefully forward. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Western_Grebe/lifehistory )

Where Does The Itch Goes After You Scratch It?

canada-goose-itch

F/6.3, 1/640, ISO 200.

Canada Goose

What do you call a pig that does karate?

A pork chop.

Interesting Fact: Some migratory populations of the Canada Goose are not going as far south in the winter as they used to. This northward range shift has been attributed to changes in farm practices that makes waste grain more available in fall and winter, as well as changes in hunting pressure and changes in weather. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Canada_Goose/lifehistory )

If I’m Going To Get Wet, I May As Well Swim.

horned-grebe

F/5.6, 1/200, ISO 500.

Horned Grebe

Why won’t they allow elephants in public swimming pools?

Because they might let down their trunks.

Interesting Fact: The Horned Grebe regularly eats some of its own feathers, enough that its stomach usually contains a matted plug of them. This plug may function as a filter or may hold fish bones in the stomach until they can be digested. The parents even feed feathers to their chicks to get the plug started early. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Horned_Grebe/lifehistory )

Work Is Just A Daily Detour On My Way To Happy Hour!

F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 320.

American Coot

What did the rug say to the floor?

Don’t move, I’ve got you covered.

Interesting Fact: Although it swims like a duck, the American Coot does not have webbed feet like a duck. Instead, each one of the coot’s long toes has broad lobes of skin that help it kick through the water. The broad lobes fold back each time the bird lifts its foot, so it doesn’t impede walking on dry land, though it supports the bird’s weight on mucky ground. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/american_coot )

Do You Think I Give A Quack!

F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 160.

Wood Duck

Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek?

Because he was always spotted.

Interesting Fact: Natural cavities for nesting are scarce, and the Wood Duck readily uses nest boxes provided for it. If nest boxes are placed too close together, many females lay eggs in the nests of other females. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Wood_Duck )

I Want To Swim Away!

Red-Necked Grebe

F/5.6, 1/200, ISO 100.

Red-Necked Grebe

One day, two thieves stole a bunch of money from a house. First thief: Let us count the money we have stolen. Second thief: Leave, why we will count and waste our time. We can see in the newspaper, tomorrow.

Interesting Fact: The Red-necked Grebe migrates over land strictly at night. It sometimes migrates over water or along coasts by day, in large flocks. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Red-necked_Grebe/lifehistory )

Duuun-Dunn-Dunn-Duh-Duh-Duh-Nuh-Nuh-Nuh-Nuuh!!!

F/5.6, 1/500, ISO 250.

Shark Week 

American Coot

Spiny Dogfish Shark

Why do sharks make terrible lawyers?

They’re too nice!

Interesting Fact: Although it swims like a duck, the American Coot does not have webbed feet like a duck. Instead, each one of the coot’s long toes has broad lobes of skin that help it kick through the water. The broad lobes fold back each time the bird lifts its foot, so it doesn’t impede walking on dry land, though it supports the bird’s weight on mucky ground. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/American_Coot )

Duck You Sucker

F/8.0, 1/250, ISO 200.

Wood Duck

A really big drunk walked into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, walked over to her and kissed her.

She jumped up and slapped him silly.

He immediately apologized and explained, “I’m sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her.”

“Why you worthless, insufferable, wretched, no good drunk!” she screamed.

“Funny,” he muttered, “you even sound exactly like her.”

Interesting Fact: Wood Ducks seem to fare best when open water alternates with 50–75% vegetative cover that the ducks can hide and forage in. This cover can consist of downed trees, shrubs such as alder, willow, and buttonbush, as well as emergent herbaceous plants such as arrowhead and smartweeds. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Wood_Duck/lifehistory )

Together We Fly!

F/13.0, 1/640, ISO 400.

Mallard

As a scarecrow, people say I’m outstanding in my field.

But hay, it’s in my jeans.

Interesting Fact: Mallards, like other ducks, shed all their flight feathers at the end of the breeding season and are flightless for 3–4 weeks. They are secretive during this vulnerable time, and their body feathers molt into a concealing “eclipse” plumage that can make them hard to identify. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Mallard )