Everything In Your Life Is Reflection Of A Choice You Have Made, If You Want A Difrent Result, Make A Different Choice.

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Mute Swan

A pirate was on his ship and his watchman comes to him and says, “1 enemy ship on the horizont.”

The captain says, “Bring me my red shirt, no men get injured or die.”

So the watchman comes to him and asks, “Why did you want your red shirt?”

The captain says, “Because if i get injured they won’t see and keep on fighting.”

So the watchman comes to him again and says, “20 enemy ships on the horizont.”

The captain says, “Bring me my brown pants.”

Interesting Fact:  Mute Swans can adapt to degraded habitat and actually benefit from the spread of the invasive common reed Phragmites australis, which flourishes in disturbed sites. As the reeds spread into lakes and ponds, the swans can build nests farther offshore in the reed beds, where they’re safer from egg predators. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Mute_Swan/lifehistory )

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Water Chicken!

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American Coot

“Babe is it in?”

“Yea.” “Does it hurt?”

“Uh huh.”

“Let me put it in slowly.”

“It still hurts.”

“Okay, let’s try another shoe size.”

Interesting Fact: A slow and meticulous forager, the American Coot plucks at plants while walking, swimming, dabbling with its head just underwater, or in full dives. In flight coots are clumsy and labored (though less so than Common Moorhens). To get airborne, coots typically have to beat their wings while running across the water for many yards. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/American_Coot/lifehistory# )

Keep Calm And Quack On!

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Red-breasted Merganser  

A motorist in a B.M.W. was driving through the countryside on a beautiful Saturday afternoon, having a lovely time, when he came to an area of the road that was covered with a rather large puddle of water from a previous rain storm. Worried that he was going to damage the car and its engine in the deep water, he spotted a nearby farmer and asked how deep the water was. “Arr”, said the local farmer “That water only be a few inches deep!” Relieved, the motorist edged his car into the water, expecting to come out the other side in no time. Instead, as he drove in, the water came right up the side of the car, and the engine sputtered to a halt. Sitting there in his soaking wet luxury car, the motorist yelled at the local angrily: “I thought you said this water was only a few inches deep!!!” “Well,” replied the local farmer “It only come up to the waist of them there ducks!”

Interesting Fact: It prefers salt water more than the other two species of merganser. ( http://identify.whatbird.com/obj/115/overview/Red-breasted_Merganser.aspx )

Even Though You’re Fed Up. You Gotta Keep Your Head Up.

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Double-crested Cormorant 

What do you call someone without a nose or a body?

Nobodynose.

Interesting Fact: Both Double-crested Cormorant mates work on the nest, with the male bringing most of the material and the female doing the building. The nest is mostly made of finger-size sticks, with some seaweed and flotsam, and lined with grass. Nests are 1.5 to 3 feet in diameter and 4 to 17 inches high; ground nests tend to be wider than tree nests, but tree nests have deeper interiors. Breeding cormorants readily steal nesting materials from a nearby nest that’s not guarded. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Double-crested_Cormorant/lifehistory )

The Fog Always Lifts.

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Canada Goose

What do clouds do when they become rich?

A. They make it rain!

Interesting Fact: Nest Placement on the ground, usually on a muskrat mound or other slightly elevated site, near water. They prefer a spot from which they can have a fairly unobstructed view in many directions. Female selects the site and does much of nest construction. She adds down feathers and some body feathers beginning after the second egg is laid. She does all the incubation while her mate guards her and the nest.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Canada_Goose/lifehistory )

Ehh, What’s Up Duck?

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Mallard 

Why did the duck cross the road?

Because there was a quack in the sidewalk. 

Interesting Fact:  Ducks have webbed feet, which they use for paddling beneath the water. Their feet have no nerves or blood vessels, which mean that they won’t feel chill from swimming in icy water. ( https://americanexpedition.us/mallard-duck-information-facts-photos-and-artwork )

You Wanna Fly You Got To Give Up The Shit That Weighs You Down.

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Double-crested Cormorant 

How does NASA organize a party?

They planet

Interesting Fact: The male chooses the nest site and then attracts a female. Nests can be on the ground, on rocks or reefs with no vegetation, or atop trees, which may be alive when a cormorant colony first forms but typically die after a few years from the guano build-up. Nests are built in the center of a colony first, then expand outward. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Double-crested_Cormorant/lifehistory )

Take Off And See Whats Out There!

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Common Merganser ( Female )

Why was the baby strawberry crying?

Because her mom and dad were in a jam.

Interesting Fact: The female chooses the nest site, which is usually in a natural cavity or woodpecker hole in a live or dead tree, up to 100 feet off the ground and within a mile of water. Common Mergansers nest less frequently in rock crevices, old sheds, chimneys, lighthouses, holes in banks, holes in the ground, hollow logs, and burrows. They readily nest in boxes, including those designed for the much smaller Common Goldeneye. Sometimes they nest on the ground. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Common_Merganser/lifehistory )

Grow Old With Me.

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Red-breasted Mergansers

Why did the boy eat his homework?

Because his teacher said it was a piece of cake!

Interesting Fact: The oldest recorded Red-breasted Merganser was a female, and at least 9 years, 6 months old when she was shot in Alaska, the same state where she had been banded. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Red-breasted_Merganser/lifehistory )

Keep Going Everything You Need Will Come To You At The Perfect Time.

Happy International Women’s Day

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Horned Grebe

What did the man say to the wall?

One more crack like that and I’ll plaster ya!

Interesting Fact: A sleeping or resting Horned Grebe puts its neck on its back with its head off to one side and facing forward. It keeps one foot tucked up under a wing and uses the other one to maneuver in the water. Having one foot up under a wing makes it float with one “high” side and one “low” side.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Horned_Grebe/lifehistory )

How To Say Happy Women’s Day in Different Languages.

English

Happy Women’s Day

Polish

Szczęśliwy Dzień Kobie

Espanol

Feliz Día de la Mujer

Arabic

وم المرأة العالمي

Italian

Felice Giorno delle Donne

German

Alles Gute zum Tag der Frauen

Portuguese

Feliz Dia Da Mulher

Swedish

Glad kvinnors dag

Hindi

mahila divas kee shubhakaamanae

Korean

yeoseong-ui nal-eul chugha haeyo

Spanish

Feliz Día de la Mujer

Ukrainian

Поздравляю тебя с восьмым марта

French

Bonne Journée de la Femme

Russian

С Международным женским днем [S Mezhdunarodnym zhenskim dnem]

Malayalam

vanitā dinattinṟe santēāṣaṁ

Kannada

Mahileyara Dinada Shubhashayagalu

Telugu

Mahiḷa dinōtsava śubhākāṅkṣalu

Gujarati

Khuśa mahilā divasa

Bangla

Śubha nārī dibasa

Urdu

یوم خواتین مبارک

Chinese

妇女节快乐 [fù nǚ jié kuài lè]

Persian

روز زن مبارک

Turkish

Kadınlar günün kutlu olsun!

Greek

Ευτυχισμένη η ημέρα της γυναίκας

Japanese

Kokusai josei day