The Fish Was This Big! I Swear!

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 320.

Canada Goose

What does a pig put on its paper cut?

Oinkment!

Interesting Fact:  At least 11 subspecies of Canada Goose have been recognized, although only a couple are distinctive. In general, the geese get smaller as you move northward, and darker as you go westward. The four smallest forms are now considered a different species: the Cackling Goose. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Canada_Goose/lifehistory )

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I Rule The SKY!

F/6.3, 1/640, ISO 100.

Red-tailed Hawk

Why did the witches’ team lose the baseball game?

Their bats flew away.

Interesting Fact: Red-tailed Hawks typically put their nests in the crowns of tall trees where they have a commanding view of the landscape. They may also nest on a cliff ledge or on artificial structures such as window ledges and billboard platforms. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Red-tailed_Hawk/lifehistory )

Shhhh… I’m Hiding From Stupid People!

F/5.6, 1/500, ISO 200.

Great Egret 

Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

It was a high school.

Interesting Fact: The male builds a nest platform from long sticks and twigs before pairing up with a female, and then both members of the pair may collaborate to complete the nest, though the male sometimes finishes it himself. The nest is up to 3 feet across and 1 foot deep. It is lined with pliable plant material that dries to form a cup structure. They don’t typically reuse nests from year to year. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Great_Egret/lifehistory )

When I think about you, I touch myself.

F/6.3, 1/80, ISO 200.

American Flamingo 

What do whales take to stay healthy?

Vitamin Sea

Interesting Fact: A group of flamingos has many collective nouns, including a “colony”, “flamboyance”, “flurry”, “regiment”, and “stand” of flamingos. ( http://identify.whatbird.com/obj/940/overview/American_Flamingo.aspx )

Did You Just Fart? Because You Blew Me Away!

F/8.0, 1/250, ISO 160.

Palmchat

What did the inventor of the door knocker win?

The no bell prize.

Interesting Fact: They are voluble and noisy birds, with a large repertoire of gurgling and cheeping sounds constantly used in their social behavior. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Palmchat )

I Might Look Like I’m Doing Nothing, But In My Head I’m Quite Busy.

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 150.

Green Heron

Why did the dog sit in the shade?

Because he didn’t want to be a hot dog!

Interesting Fact:  The male begins building the nest before pairing up to breed, but afterward passes off most of the construction to his mate. As the male gathers long, thin sticks, the female shapes them into a nest 8–12 inches across, with a shallow depression averaging less than 2 inches deep. The nest varies from solid to flimsy, and has no lining. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Green_Heron/lifehistory )

 

Motorboating Is My Thing!

F/11.0, 1/500, ISO 250.

Mallard Female

Which day of the week do chickens hate most?

Fry-day!

Interesting Fact: The female forms a shallow depression or bowl on the ground in moist earth. She does not carry material to the nest but rather pulls vegetation she can reach toward her while sitting on nest. During egg-laying phase, she lines the nest with grasses, leaves, and twigs from nearby. She also pulls tall vegetation over to conceal herself and her nest. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Mallard/lifehistory )

I May Look Like I’m Having Deep Thoughts, But Really I Need To Fart.

F/13.0, 1/640, ISO 400.

Semipalmated Sandpiper

Why do scuba divers fall backwards into the water?

Because if they fell forwards they’d still be in the boat.

Interesting Fact:  Semipalmated Sandpipers from eastern populations probably undertake nonstop transoceanic flights of 3,000 – 4,000 km (1,900 – 2,500 mi) from New England and southern Canada to South America, powered by extensive fat reserves. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Semipalmated_Sandpiper/lifehistory )

 

Gone Fishing!

F/11.0, 1/500, ISO 125.

Osprey

What did the fish say when he posted bail?

“I’m off the hook!”

Interesting Fact:  The Osprey is the only hawk on the continent that eats almost exclusively live fish. In North America, more than 80 species of live fresh- and saltwater fish account for 99 percent of the Osprey’s diet. Captured fish usually measure about 6–13 inches in length and weigh one-third to two-thirds of a pound. The largest catch on record weighed about 2.5 pounds.  (  https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Osprey/lifehistory )

Let The Sea Set You Free.

F/13.0, 1/640, ISO 400.

Common Terns

Why was the math textbook so sad?

He had a lot of problems!

Interesting Fact: The Common Tern is sometimes called the sea swallow. A group of common terns are collectively known as a “committee” of terns. ( http://identify.whatbird.com/mwg/_/0/identify.whatbird.com/obj/465/overview/Common_Tern.aspx )