I invented a cold air balloon, but it didn’t really take off.

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Albuquerque International Balloon Fiesta

Breaking: A man was arrested yesterday for impersonating a helium balloon.

A spokesperson for the police said.. We held him for a while and then let him go..

Interesting Fact: The Balloon Fiesta grew each year for decades, and today is the largest balloon convention in the world. The number of registered balloons reached a peak of 1,019 in 2000, prompting the Balloon Fiesta Board to limit the number to 750 starting in 2001,[4] citing a desire for “quality over quantity”. The limit was changed to 600 in 2009 –; citing recent growth in the city and a loss of landing zones. On any given day during the festival, up to 100,000 spectators may be on the launch field where they are provided the rare opportunity to observe inflation and take off procedures. Countless more people gather at landing sites all over the city to watch incoming balloons.  ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Albuquerque_International_Balloon_Fiesta#Albuquerque_box )

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I Have A Funny Feeling It’s Going To Be One Of Those Days!

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Black Vulture

A farmer goes out and buys a new, young rooster. As soon as he brings him home, the
young rooster rushes and screws all 150 of the farmers hens. The farmer is impressed.
At lunchtime, the young rooster again screws all 150 hens. The farmer is not just impressed anymore,he is worried. Next morning,not only is the rooster screwin…g the hens but he is screwing the turkeys,ducks even the cow.
Later farmer looks out into the barnyard and finds the rooster stretched out, limp as a rag, his eyes closed, dead and vultures circling overhead.
The farmer runs out, looks down at the young roosters limp body and says: “You deserved it, you horny bastard!”
And the young rooster opens one eye, points up at the vultures with his wing, and says, Shhhh!,they are about to land.”

Interesting Fact: One-on-one at a carcass, Black Vultures lose out to the slightly larger Turkey Vulture. But flocks of Black Vultures can quickly take over a carcass and drive the more solitary Turkey Vultures away. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Black_Vulture/lifehistory )

Sometimes They Come Back Again!

F/5.0, 1/250, ISO 400.

White-Tailed Deer

Where do old bowling balls end up?

In the gutter!

Interesting Fact: The fawn is also weaned by the time it loses its spots. By November the average whitetail male fawn will weigh close to 80 to 85 pounds, and the female fawn will weigh 75 to 80 pounds. As the spots disappear, the fawn’s coat also changes from its reddish color to a grayish winter coat. The buck fawn’s face grows a bit darker in color but the belly remains white. ( http://www.the-whitetail-deer.com/whitetail-deer-fawns.html )

 

I Know A Morse Code!

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Yellow-Bellied Sapsucker

Why are gold fish orange?

The water makes them rusty!

Interesting Fact: The Yellow-bellied Sapsucker is the only woodpecker in eastern North America that is completely migratory. Although a few individuals remain throughout much of the winter in the southern part of the breeding range, most head farther south, going as far south as Panama. Females tend to migrate farther south than do males. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Yellow-bellied_Sapsucker/overview )

F.L.Y. ( First Love Yourself )

F/7.1, 1/800, ISO 200.

Common Tern

Why do you always see teen girls in groups of three?

Because they literally can’t even.

Interesting Fact: Males and females make a small scrape on the ground. Females add dead vegetation that has washed onshore, shell fragments, bones, stones, and sometimes plastic to the nest scrape before and after laying eggs.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Common_Tern/lifehistory )

 

 

 

But Officer, I’ve Never Been Able To Walk A Straight Line.

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Atlantic Ghost Crab

Why is there only one Yogi Bear?

Because when they tried to make another one, they made a Boo-Boo.

Interesting Fact: Crabs of this species usually engage in a combat that is non-contact. The combat style is more ritualistic in style and ends in contact in very rare cases. ( https://www.animalspot.net/ghost-crab-sand-crab.html )

 

 

Look Into My Eyes!

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Black-crowned Night-Heron

What did a tree fighting with autumn say?

That’s it, I’m leaving.

Interesting Fact: The male chooses a nest site in a tree or in cattails—usually in a habitat safe from predators such as on an island, in a swamp, or over water—and then advertises for a female. Black-crowned Night-Herons nest colonially, often with a dozen nests in a single tree. Colonies sometimes last for 50 years or more. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Black-crowned_Night-Heron/lifehistory )

 

 

Come Out Come Out Wherever You Are?!

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Red-tailed Hawk

Which runs faster, hot or cold?

HOT. Everyone can catch cold.

Interesting Fact: Red-tailed Hawks are large, sharp-taloned birds that can be aggressive when defending nests or territories. They frequently chase off other hawks, eagles, and Great Horned Owls. Courting birds fly with legs hanging beneath them, or chase and swoop after each other, sometimes locking talons. Mated pairs typically stay together until one of the pair dies. ( https://throughopenlens.com/tag/red-tailed-hawk/ )

Quack Like You Mean It!

F/14.0, 1/500, ISO 800.

Black Scoter

This guy went to school and he asked
“May I use the bathroom?”
The teacher replied, ” no not unless you say your abc’s.”
The guy said “a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o q r s t u v w x y z.”
The teacher asked “Where’s the p?
He replied, ” running down my leg!”

Interesting Fact:  The Black Scoter occasionally does a “Wing-flap” display while swimming, flapping its wings with its body held up out of the water. Unlike other scoters, it almost always punctuates a Wing-flap with a characteristic downward thrust of head, as if its neck were momentarily broken. Surf and White-winged scoters keep their heads and bills pointing more or less above the horizontal throughout a Wing-flap.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Black_Scoter/lifehistory )

Life Is So Much Easier When You Just Chill Out.

F/8.0, 1/250, ISO 500.

Greater Yellowlegs

Why are trees very forgiving?

Because in the Fall they “Let It Go” and in the Spring they “turn over a new leaf”.

Interesting Fact: The Greater Yellowlegs nest is a simple depression in the moss or peat, sometimes lined with leaves and lichen. The finished nest is about 6 inches across and the inner cup is about an inch deep. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Greater_Yellowlegs/lifehistory )