Touchdown!

F/11.0, 1/500, ISO 400.

Ring-billed Gull 

What should you do if you’re afraid of elevators?

Take steps to avoid them.

Interesting Fact: Ring-billed Gulls are strong, graceful flyers. They can race along at more than 40 miles per hour, and they’re adept at snatching food from the air. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Ring-billed_Gull/lifehistory )

Get Ready, Set, Goooooooo!!!!!

F/7.1, 1/160, ISO 500.

Tufted Titmouse 

Why did the artist bring a pencil and paper to a duel?

He wanted to draw his weapon.

Interesting Fact: Tufted Titmice flit from branch to branch of the forest canopy looking for food, often in the company of other species including nuthatches, chickadees, kinglets, and woodpeckers. When they find large seeds, such as the sunflower seeds they take from bird feeders, titmice typically hold the seed with their feet and hammer it open with their beaks. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Tufted_Titmouse/lifehistory )

 

Cause I’m A Wanderer!

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 400. 

White-breasted Nuthatch

What was the murderer’s last request to the priest as he sat in the electric chair?

Will you hold my hand?

Interesting Fact: White-breasted Nuthatches forage up, down, and sideways over tree trunks and around large branches. They often (though not always) start high in trees and move down them head first, pausing to crane their necks up and back, toward the horizontal, for a look around. They probe into bark crevices or chip away at wood to find food. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/White-breasted_Nuthatch/lifehistory )

 

Let’s Go!

F/11.0, 1/500, ISO 400.

Black-capped Chickadee

Two snakes are talking.

One of them turns to the other and asks, “Are we venomous?”

The other replays, “Yes, why?…”

“I just bit ma lip.”

Interesting Fact: Most birds that associate with chickadee flocks respond to chickadee alarm calls, even when their own species doesn’t have a similar alarm call. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Black-capped_Chickadee/lifehistory )

I Can’t Stop Watching You!

F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 400.

Peregrine Falcon

What does a teddy bear say when you offer it a sandwich?

“No thanks, I’m stuffed”

Interesting Fact: Peregrine Falcons are very strong fliers and often reported to be the fastest bird in the world. Their average cruising flight speed is 24 to 33 mph, increasing to 67 mph when in pursuit of prey. When stooping, or dropping on prey with their wings closed, it’s been calculated that Peregrine Falcons can achieve speeds of 238 mph. One researcher studied trained Peregrine Falcons while skydiving and described their body position while diving at 150 mph and 200 mph. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Peregrine_Falcon/lifehistory )

 

Don’t Rush Me I’m Waiting For The Last Minute!

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 800.

Belted Kingfisher

Why can’t you write with a broken pencil?

Because it’s pointless.

Interesting Fact: During breeding season the Belted Kingfisher pair defends a territory against other kingfishers. A territory along a stream includes just the streambed and the vegetation along it, and averages 0.6 mile long. The nest burrow is usually in a dirt bank near water. The tunnel slopes upward from the entrance, perhaps to keep water from entering the nest. Tunnel length ranges from 1 to 8 feet. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Belted_Kingfisher )

 

 

Are You Talking To Me?!

northern-cardinal-4

F/6.3, 1/250, ISO 450.

Northern Cardinal

What did little Tom’s mother do when she caught him zapping the other children with static electricity?

She grounded him.

Interesting Fact: The oldest recorded Northern Cardinal was a female, and was 15 years, 9 months old when she was found in Pennsylvania. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Northern_Cardinal/lifehistory )

My Best Friend Is My Reflection!

F/ 6.3, 1/640, ISO 200.

Snowy Egret

Did you here about the mathematician who was afraid of negative numbers?

He will stop at nothing to avoid them.

Interesting Fact: The oldest Snowy Egret on record was at least 17 years, 7 months old. It was banded in Colorado in 1970 and found in Mexico in 1988. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Snowy_Egret )

If You Can’t Reach It You Don’t Need It!

F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 400.

Pileated Woodpecker

How are a husband and a cat similar when it comes to housework?

They both hide when they see the vacuum cleaner.

Interesting Fact: The feeding excavations of a Pileated Woodpecker are so extensive that they often attract other birds. Other woodpeckers, as well as House Wrens, may come and feed there. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Pileated_Woodpecker )

 

Don’t Be Afraid To Stick Your Neck Out!

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 100.

Mute Swan

What did one potato chip say to the other?

Shall we go for a dip?

Interesting Fact: Short legs placed well back on the body give Mute Swans an awkward walking gait, but the birds can run quickly if pursued and can take off from land and water, flying with head and neck extended. On the water they sometimes hold their wings slightly raised and “sail” with the wind. Mute Swans are predominantly monogamous and form long-lasting breeding pairs. They are extremely aggressive in defending their breeding territory. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Mute_Swan/lifehistory )