Patience Is Not The Ability To Wait But How You Act While You’re Waiting

F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 400.

Black Vulture

Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon?

Because she will Let it go.

Interesting Fact: Black Vultures lack a voice box and so their vocal abilities are limited to making raspy hisses and grunts. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Black_Vulture/lifehistory )

Don’t Play Dead With A Vulture. That’s Exactly What They Want.

turkey-vulture

F/6.3, 1/160, ISO 100.

Turkey Vulture

As migration approached, two elderly vultures doubted they could make the trip south, so they decided to go by airplane.

When they checked their baggage, the attendant noticed that they were carrying two dead raccoons. “Do you wish to check the raccoons through as luggage?” she asked.

“No, thanks,” replied the vultures. “They’re carrion.”

Interesting Fact: Turkey Vultures, like other carrion birds, are protected from disease associated with decaying animals by a very sophisticated immune system. ( http://identify.whatbird.com/mwg/_/0/identify.whatbird.com/obj/117/overview/Turkey_Vulture.aspx )

I Have A Funny Feeling It’s Going To Be One Of Those Days!

black-vulture-1

F/5.6, 1/125, ISO 250.

Black Vulture

A farmer goes out and buys a new, young rooster. As soon as he brings him home, the
young rooster rushes and screws all 150 of the farmers hens. The farmer is impressed.
At lunchtime, the young rooster again screws all 150 hens. The farmer is not just impressed anymore,he is worried. Next morning,not only is the rooster screwin…g the hens but he is screwing the turkeys,ducks even the cow.
Later farmer looks out into the barnyard and finds the rooster stretched out, limp as a rag, his eyes closed, dead and vultures circling overhead.
The farmer runs out, looks down at the young roosters limp body and says: “You deserved it, you horny bastard!”
And the young rooster opens one eye, points up at the vultures with his wing, and says, Shhhh!,they are about to land.”

Interesting Fact: One-on-one at a carcass, Black Vultures lose out to the slightly larger Turkey Vulture. But flocks of Black Vultures can quickly take over a carcass and drive the more solitary Turkey Vultures away. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Black_Vulture/lifehistory )

Why Wasn’t I Casted In The “Angry Bird” Movie?!

Chipping Sparrow 1

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 100.

Chipping Sparrow 

Bob: You know Tom, sometimes I don’t understand life.
Tom: What do you mean?
Bob: When we were a younger, we learnt to talk and to walk. At school, we always have to sit down and shut up…

Interesting Fact: In much of the West, Chipping Sparrows disperse shortly after breeding to move to areas with better food resources. It’s not unusual to see Chipping Sparrows on alpine tundra or along roadsides in open grasslands. This results in the common misperception that they bred in those areas, when really they simply moved there to molt. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Chipping_Sparrow/lifehistory )

Come Visit My Branch

Magnolia Warbler

F/5.6, 1/400, ISO 100.

Magnolia Warbler

Two birds in a tree looking down on a man washing his car.

“If he doesn’t hurry up and finish,” says one bird to the 15other, “I’ll shit myself.”

Interesting Fact: Though it has very specific habitat preferences in the breeding season, the Magnolia Warbler occupies a very broad range of habitats in winter:  from sea level to 1,500 meters elevation, and most landscape types, except cleared fields. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Magnolia_Warbler/lifehistory )

Where’s The Beef?!

Black Vulture

F/5.6, 1/125, ISO 800.

Black Vulture

Two vultures were in the desert eating a dead clown. The first vulture asks the second vulture: “Does this taste funny to you?”

Interesting Fact: Turkey Vultures have an excellent sense of smell, but Black Vultures aren’t nearly as accomplished sniffers. To find food they soar high in the sky and keep an eye on the lower-soaring Turkey Vultures. When a Turkey Vulture’s nose detects the delicious aroma of decaying flesh and descends on a carcass, the Black Vulture follows close behind. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Black_Vulture/lifehistory )

I’m Not A Player. I Just Crash A Lot.

Nutcracker

F/ 5.6, 1/60, ISO 250.

Day 343 / 365

What ballet do squirrels like?

The Nutcracker.

Interesting Fact: Manufacturers produce modern nutcrackers—designed to crack nuts—usually somewhat resembling pliers, but with the pivot point at the end beyond the nut, rather than in the middle. The spring-jointed nutcracker was patented by Henry Quackenbush in 1913. These are also used for cracking the shells of crab and lobster to make the meat inside available for eating. Nuts have long been a popular choice for desserts, particularly throughout Europe. The nutcrackers were placed on dining tables to serve as a fun and entertaining center of conversation while diners awaited their final course. At one time, nutcrackers were actually made of metals such as brass, and it wasn’t until maller birds crack seeds. In this case, the pivot point stands opposite the nut, at the jaw. Nutcrackers have also been used as a token of good luck and goodwill to protect people from evil spirits and danger. They were thought to bare their teeth at any evil spirits to scare them away, just like a guard dog might do. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nutcracker )