They Don’t Call Me King For Nothing

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 200.

Belted Kingfisher

What is a baby’s motto?

If at first you don’t succeed cry cry again!

Interesting Fact: The breeding distribution of the Belted Kingfisher is limited in some areas by the availability of suitable nesting sites. Human activity, such as road building and digging gravel pits, has created banks where kingfishers can nest and allowed the expansion of the breeding range. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Belted_Kingfisher/lifehistory )

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It’s Good To Be The King

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 250.

Belted Kingfisher

What do you call a pig that does karate?

A pork chop.

Interesting Fact: Belted Kingfishers excavate burrows in earthen banks, usually avoiding ones with vegetation (especially trees, whose roots get in the way of digging). They generally choose a bank near water, but may use a ditch, road cut, landfill, sand pit, or gravel pit far from water. A pair may select a nest site during courtship, usually high in the bank where floodwaters are unlikely to reach. The male probes the bank with his bill, flying back and forth to the female, who calls continuously from a nearby perch. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Belted_Kingfisher/lifehistory )

Bird Power!

F/6.3, 1/125, ISO 250.

Belted Kingfisher

Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze!

Interesting Fact: The Belted Kingfisher is one of the few bird species in which the female is more brightly colored than the male. Among the nearly 100 species of kingfishers, the sexes often look alike. In some species the male is more colorful, and in others the female is. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Belted_Kingfisher )

So Do You Think That Worm Will Come Out Soon?

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 400.

Wild Turkeys

What’s the opposite of Dominoes?

Domi doesnt know.

Interesting Fact: They usually roost in flocks, but sometimes individually. Courting males gobble to attract females and warn competing males. They display for females by strutting with their tails fanned, wings lowered, while making nonvocal hums and chump sounds.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Wild_Turkey/lifehistory )

 

Patience Is Not The Ability To Wait But How You Act While You’re Waiting

F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 400.

Black Vulture

Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon?

Because she will Let it go.

Interesting Fact: Black Vultures lack a voice box and so their vocal abilities are limited to making raspy hisses and grunts. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Black_Vulture/lifehistory )

Don’t Play Dead With A Vulture. That’s Exactly What They Want.

turkey-vulture

F/6.3, 1/160, ISO 100.

Turkey Vulture

As migration approached, two elderly vultures doubted they could make the trip south, so they decided to go by airplane.

When they checked their baggage, the attendant noticed that they were carrying two dead raccoons. “Do you wish to check the raccoons through as luggage?” she asked.

“No, thanks,” replied the vultures. “They’re carrion.”

Interesting Fact: Turkey Vultures, like other carrion birds, are protected from disease associated with decaying animals by a very sophisticated immune system. ( http://identify.whatbird.com/mwg/_/0/identify.whatbird.com/obj/117/overview/Turkey_Vulture.aspx )

I Have A Funny Feeling It’s Going To Be One Of Those Days!

black-vulture-1

F/5.6, 1/125, ISO 250.

Black Vulture

A farmer goes out and buys a new, young rooster. As soon as he brings him home, the
young rooster rushes and screws all 150 of the farmers hens. The farmer is impressed.
At lunchtime, the young rooster again screws all 150 hens. The farmer is not just impressed anymore,he is worried. Next morning,not only is the rooster screwin…g the hens but he is screwing the turkeys,ducks even the cow.
Later farmer looks out into the barnyard and finds the rooster stretched out, limp as a rag, his eyes closed, dead and vultures circling overhead.
The farmer runs out, looks down at the young roosters limp body and says: “You deserved it, you horny bastard!”
And the young rooster opens one eye, points up at the vultures with his wing, and says, Shhhh!,they are about to land.”

Interesting Fact: One-on-one at a carcass, Black Vultures lose out to the slightly larger Turkey Vulture. But flocks of Black Vultures can quickly take over a carcass and drive the more solitary Turkey Vultures away. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Black_Vulture/lifehistory )

Why Wasn’t I Casted In The “Angry Bird” Movie?!

Chipping Sparrow 1

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 100.

Chipping Sparrow 

Bob: You know Tom, sometimes I don’t understand life.
Tom: What do you mean?
Bob: When we were a younger, we learnt to talk and to walk. At school, we always have to sit down and shut up…

Interesting Fact: In much of the West, Chipping Sparrows disperse shortly after breeding to move to areas with better food resources. It’s not unusual to see Chipping Sparrows on alpine tundra or along roadsides in open grasslands. This results in the common misperception that they bred in those areas, when really they simply moved there to molt. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Chipping_Sparrow/lifehistory )

Come Visit My Branch

Magnolia Warbler

F/5.6, 1/400, ISO 100.

Magnolia Warbler

Two birds in a tree looking down on a man washing his car.

“If he doesn’t hurry up and finish,” says one bird to the 15other, “I’ll shit myself.”

Interesting Fact: Though it has very specific habitat preferences in the breeding season, the Magnolia Warbler occupies a very broad range of habitats in winter:  from sea level to 1,500 meters elevation, and most landscape types, except cleared fields. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Magnolia_Warbler/lifehistory )

Where’s The Beef?!

Black Vulture

F/5.6, 1/125, ISO 800.

Black Vulture

Two vultures were in the desert eating a dead clown. The first vulture asks the second vulture: “Does this taste funny to you?”

Interesting Fact: Turkey Vultures have an excellent sense of smell, but Black Vultures aren’t nearly as accomplished sniffers. To find food they soar high in the sky and keep an eye on the lower-soaring Turkey Vultures. When a Turkey Vulture’s nose detects the delicious aroma of decaying flesh and descends on a carcass, the Black Vulture follows close behind. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Black_Vulture/lifehistory )