Just Showing Off!

F/6.3, 1/100, ISO 500.

Wild Turkeys ( Male )

A blonde driving a car became lost in a snowstorm.

She didn’t panic however, because she remembered what her dad had once told her. “If you ever get stuck in a snowstorm, just wait for a snow plow to come by and follow it.”

Sure enough, pretty soon a snow plow came by, and she started to follow it.

She followed the plow for about forty-five minutes. Finally the driver of the truck got out and asked her what she was doing.

And she explained that her dad had told her if she ever got stuck in a snow storm, to follow a plow.

The driver nodded and said, “Well, I’m done with the Wal-Mart parking lot, do you want to follow me over to Best Buy now?”

Interesting Fact: Wild Turkeys nest on the ground in dead leaves at the bases of trees, under brush piles or thick shrubbery, or occasionally in open hayfields. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Wild_Turkey/lifehistory )

Away With You…. PHEASANT.

ring-necked-pheasant

F/6.3, 1/500, ISO 1100.

Ring-Necked Pheasant

A pheasant says to a bull, “I would love to get on top of that tree, but I haven’t the energy.”

“Well,” says the bull, “why don’t you eat some of my dung? It’s packed with nutrients.”

So the pheasant eats some dung and finds that it gives him enough energy to get to the first branch. The next day, he eats some more and gets to the next branch. This cycle continues for a week. Finally, the pheasant is at the top of the tree, where he is spotted by the farmer, who shoots him with a shotgun.

Moral of the Story: bullsh*t might take you to the top, but it won’t keep you there.

Interesting Fact: While the birds normally don’t cover more than about 600 feet at a time, strong winds can extend their flights considerably. Observers in 1941 reported seeing a pheasant fly a record four miles while crossing a body of water. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Ring-necked_Pheasant/lifehistory )

Mother Pheasant Plucker!

F/6.3, 1/250, ISO 1600.

Ring-Necked Pheasant

What is dangerous?

Sneezing while having diarrhea!

Interesting Fact:  Pheasants, along with most members of the grouse family, have specialized, powerful breast muscles—the “white meat” that you find on a chicken. These muscles deliver bursts of power that allow the birds to escape trouble in a hurry, flushing nearly vertically into the air and reaching speeds of nearly 40 miles per hour.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Ring-necked_Pheasant/lifehistory )

Tonight Revenge Is Ours!… Get Him!!!

F/6.3, 1/160, ISO 320.

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!

Wild Turkeys

Why do pilgrims’ pants always fall down?

Because they wear their belt buckles on their hats!

Interesting Fact: The Wild Turkey and the Muscovy Duck are the only two domesticated birds native to the New World. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Wild_Turkey/lifehistory )

Bonus Thanksgiving Facts: Setting aside time to give thanks for one’s blessings, along with holding feasts to celebrate a harvest, are both practices that long predate the European settlement of North America. The first documented thanksgiving services in territory currently belonging to the United States were conducted by Spaniards[9][10] and the French[11] in the 16th century. Wisdom practices such as expressing gratitude, sharing, and giving away, are integral to many indigenous cultures and communities. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thanksgiving_(United_States)#History )

 

Is It True That You Just Love Me For My Breasts?

 

F/6.0, 1/160, ISO 320.

Wild Turkey

What did the turkey say to the computer?

Google, google, google.

Interesting Fact: Wild Turkeys live year-round in open forests with interspersed clearings in 49 states (excluding Alaska), parts of Mexico, and parts of southern Alberta, Ontario, Manitoba, and Saskatchewan, Canada.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Wild_Turkey/lifehistory )

 

I Am Not A Patient Person

F/7.1, 1/160, ISO 320.

Wild Turkey 

How do you make an egg laugh?

Tell it a yolk.

Interesting Fact: Despite their weight, wild turkeys, unlike their domesticated counterparts, are agile, fast fliers. In ideal habitat of open woodland or wooded grasslands,[20] they may fly beneath the canopy top and find perches. They usually fly close to the ground for no more than 400 m (a quarter mile). ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wild_turkey )

 

I Enjoy Long Romantic Walks To The Fridge.

F/6.3, 1/100, ISO 250.

Wild Turkey

What did the lawyer name his daughter?

Sue.

Interesting Fact: The English name of the bird may be a holdover from early shipping routes that passed through the country of Turkey on their way to delivering the birds to European markets. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Wild_Turkey/lifehistory )

I Wonder If Chickens Do The “People Dance ” At Their Wedding

F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 400.

Chickens

What did the chicken say when it got to the library?

Book book book book book book book…

Interesting Fact: People have been raising chickens for more than 7,000 years. Chickens were first domesticated in Indian and China. You might think of chickens as farm animals, but even people in cities can raise a few chickens in the backyard. Chicken coops don’t take up much room. ( http://easyscienceforkids.com/all-about-chickens/ )

So Do You Think That Worm Will Come Out Soon?

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 400.

Wild Turkeys

What’s the opposite of Dominoes?

Domi doesnt know.

Interesting Fact: They usually roost in flocks, but sometimes individually. Courting males gobble to attract females and warn competing males. They display for females by strutting with their tails fanned, wings lowered, while making nonvocal hums and chump sounds.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Wild_Turkey/lifehistory )

 

Don’t Be Such A Turkey!

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 500.

Wild Turkeys

Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill?

Because it wanted to get to the bottom.

Interesting Fact: Wild Turkeys nest on the ground in dead leaves at the bases of trees, under brush piles or thick shrubbery, or occasionally in open hayfields. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Wild_Turkey/lifehistory )