I’m Over Here!

F/13.0, 1/640, ISO 320.

Double-crested Cormorant

Teacher called on a student in the classroom:

Teacher: Name two days of the week that start with “t”.

Student: Today and Tomorrow

Interesting Fact: Double-crested Cormorant nests often are exposed to direct sun. Adults shade the chicks and also bring them water, pouring it from their mouths into those of the chicks. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Double-crested_Cormorant/lifehistory )

Gone Fishing!

F/11.0, 1/500, ISO 125.

Osprey

What did the fish say when he posted bail?

“I’m off the hook!”

Interesting Fact:  The Osprey is the only hawk on the continent that eats almost exclusively live fish. In North America, more than 80 species of live fresh- and saltwater fish account for 99 percent of the Osprey’s diet. Captured fish usually measure about 6–13 inches in length and weigh one-third to two-thirds of a pound. The largest catch on record weighed about 2.5 pounds.  (  https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Osprey/lifehistory )

Keep Calm And Quack Quack!

F/11.0, 1/500, ISO 500.

Black Scoter

Mother: What did you learn in school today

Son: How to write.

Mother: What did you write?

Son: I don’t know, they haven’t taught us how to read yet!

Interesting Fact: The Black Scoter is divided into two subspecies. In the form found in Europe, the “Common Scoter,” the male has a larger swollen knob at the base of the upper bill that is black on the sides with a yellow stripe on top, not entirely yellow. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Black_Scoter/lifehistory )

 

 

That’s Not A Wild Goose Chase. That’s Bingo.

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 400.

Domestic Geese in Wild

Which two letters in the alphabet are always jealous?

NV.

Interesting Fact: In Europe, northern Africa, and western Asia, the original domesticated geese are derived from the greylag goose Anser anser. In eastern Asia, the original domesticated geese are derived from the swan goose Anser cygnoides; these are commonly known as Chinese geese. Both have been widely introduced in more recent times, and modern flocks in both areas (and elsewhere, such as Australia and North America) may consist of either species, and/or hybrids between them. Chinese geese may be readily distinguished from European geese by the large knob at the base of the bill, though hybrids may exhibit every degree of variation between them. ( https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Domestic_goose )

Money Comes Like A Turtle And Goes Like A Rabbit.

F/11.0, 1/500, ISO 250.

Red-Eared Slider Turtle 

What do you get if cross a Turtle with a Giraffe?

A Turtle-Neck

Interesting Fact: Courtship and mating activities for red-eared sliders usually occur between March and July, and take place under water. During courtship, the male swims around the female and flutters or vibrates the back side of his long claws on and around her face and head, possibly to direct pheromones towards her.[29] The female swims toward the male and, if she is receptive, sinks to the bottom for mating. If the female is not receptive, she may become aggressive towards the male. Courtship can last 45 minutes, but mating takes only 10 minutes. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red-eared_slider )

Just Smile And Wave!

F/5.6, 1/320, ISO 100.

California Sea Lion 

Why do sea lions go to Tupperware parties?

To find a tight seal!

Interesting Fact: When diving deep, California sea lions slow their heart rates to allow them to remain underwater for nearly ten minutes before surfacing to breathe. This ability gives them an edge in the pursuit of the fish, squid, and shellfish that make up their primary diet. ( http://www.nationalgeographic.com/animals/mammals/c/california-sea-lion/ )

You Need A Bodyguard To Go Out

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 250.

Brant Goose

What’s red and bad for your teeth?

A brick.

Interesting Fact: It used to be a strictly coastal bird in winter, seldom leaving tidal estuaries, where it feeds on eel-grass (Zostera marina) and the seaweed, sea lettuce (Ulva). On the east coast of North America, the inclusion of sea lettuce is a recent change to their diet, brought about by a blight on eelgrass in 1931. This resulted in the near-extirpation of the brant. The few that survived changed their diet to include sea lettuce until the eelgrass eventually began to return. Brants have maintained this diet ever since as a survival strategy.[6] In recent decades, it has started using agricultural land a short distance inland, feeding extensively on grass and winter-sown cereals. This may be behavior learned by following other species of geese. Food resource pressure may also be important in forcing this change, as the world population has risen over 10-fold to 400,000-500,000 by the mid-1980s, possibly reaching the carrying capacity of the estuaries. In the breeding season, it uses low-lying wet coastal tundra for both breeding and feeding. The nest is bowl-shaped, lined with grass and down, in an elevated location, often in a small pond. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brant_(goose) )

I Don’t Need Therapy, I Need A Hug!

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 100.

Double-crested Cormorant

Tom had asked Fred to help him out with the deck after work, so Fred went straight over to Tom’s place. When they got to the door, Tom went straight to his wife, gave her a hug and told her how beautiful she was and how much he had missed her at work.
When it was time for dinner, he complimented his wife on her cooking, kissed her and told her how much he loved her. Once they were working on the deck, Fred told Tom that he was surprised that he fussed so much over his wife. Tom said that he’d started this about 6 months ago, it had revived their marriage and things couldn’t be better.
Fred thought he’d give it a go. When he got home, he gave his wife a massive hug, kissed her and told her that he loved her. His wife burst into tears. Fred was confused and asked why she was crying.
She said, “This is the worst day of my life. First, little Bobby fell off his bike and twisted his ankle. Then, the washing machine broke and flooded the basement. And now, you come home drunk!”

Interesting Fact: The double-crest of the Double-crested Cormorant is only visible on adults during breeding season. The crests are white in cormorants from Alaska, and black in other regions.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Double-crested_Cormorant/lifehistory )

We Are Not Short, We Are Just More Down To Earth Than Other Birds.

F/5.6, 1/500, ISO 320.

Least Sandpiper

A termite walks into a bar and says, “Where is the bar tender?”

Interesting Fact: The Least Sandpiper is the smallest shorebird in the world, weighing in at about 1 ounce and measuring 5-6 inches long. Males are slightly smaller than females. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Least_Sandpiper/lifehistory )

POLLEN: When Flowers Can’t Keep It In Their Plants.

F/14.0, 1/60, ISO 250.

Daylily

Why did the gardener plant a light bulb?

She wanted to grow a power plant!

Interesting Fact: Daylilies are perennial plants, whose name alludes to the flowers which typically last no more than 24 hours (about a day or so). The flowers of most species open in early morning and wither during the following night, possibly replaced by another one on the same scape (flower stalk) the next day. Some species are night-blooming. Daylilies are not commonly used as cut flowers for formal flower arranging, yet they make good cut flowers otherwise as new flowers continue to open on cut stems over several days. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Daylily#Etymology )