I Enjoy Long Romantic Walks On The Beach

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Great Blue Heron 

Why did the fish blush?

Because it saw the ocean’s bottom.

Interesting Fact: Great Blue Herons forage, usually alone, across much of the U.S. This largest of the North American herons wades slowly or stands stock still, peering into the water for prey. In flight the Great Blue Heron folds it neck into an “S” shape and trails its long legs behind, dangling them as it prepares to land or when courting. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Great_Blue_Heron/lifehistory )

 

 

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Duuun-Dunn-Dunn-Duh-Duh-Duh-Nuh-Nuh-Nuh-Nuuh!!!

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Shark Week 

American Coot

Spiny Dogfish Shark

Why do sharks make terrible lawyers?

They’re too nice!

Interesting Fact: Although it swims like a duck, the American Coot does not have webbed feet like a duck. Instead, each one of the coot’s long toes has broad lobes of skin that help it kick through the water. The broad lobes fold back each time the bird lifts its foot, so it doesn’t impede walking on dry land, though it supports the bird’s weight on mucky ground. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/American_Coot )

I Fear Sharks So Much That I Just Sharted!

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Pied-Billed Grebe

Why do sharks make terrible lawyers?

They’re too nice!

Interesting Fact: Pied-billed Grebe chicks typically leave the nest the first day after hatching and spend much of their first week riding around on a parent’s back. They usually spend most of their first 3 weeks on or near the nest platform. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Pied-Billed_Grebe )

In A World Full Of Fish Be A Shark

Shark Week 

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Spiny Dogfish Shark

What did the seal with the broken arm say to the shark?

Do not consume if seal is broken.

Interesting Fact: This shark is known to hunt in packs that can range up into the thousands. They are aggressive hunters and have a sizable diet that can range from squid, fish, crab, jellyfish, sea cucumber, shrimp and other invertebrates. ( https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spiny_dogfish )

Is That A Shark!

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Green Heron 

What is a sharks favorite sci-fi show?  

Shark Trek 

Interesting Fact:  Each breeding season, Green Herons pair up with one mate apiece, performing courtship displays that include stretching their necks, snapping their bills, flying with exaggerated flaps, and calling loudly.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Green_Heron/lifehistory )

Time To Start Dabbling!

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Northern Shoveler 

What do you call a dinosaur that sits on nails?

Megasaurus (mega sore ass).

Interesting Fact: Northern Shoveler pairs are monogamous, and remain together longer than pairs of other dabbling duck species. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Northern_Shoveler/lifehistory )

 

When I Dip You Dip We Dip!

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White-Cheeked Pintail 

Why did the coffee taste like mud?

It was fresh ground

Interesting Fact: White-cheeked Pintail: This species is a native of the Caribbean Islands, South America, and the Galapagos Islands. Within the United States, it is a rare to casual visitor in southern Florida. This bird is found near rivers, lakes, and ponds, as well as along costal marshes and rocky or sandy seashores. The White-cheeked Pintail was first described in 1758 by Carolus Linnaeus, Swedish botanist, physician and zoologist. ( http://identify.whatbird.com/obj/1029/overview/White-cheeked_Pintail.aspx )

We Are Not Talking If You Are Wondering!

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Greater Yellowlegs

What’s invisible and smells like carrots?

Bunny Farts!

Interesting Fact: The Greater Yellowlegs walks with a distinctive high-stepping gait across wetlands when foraging, occasionally dashing forward in pursuit of a prey item. Compared to other shorebirds, the Greater Yellowlegs is often rather solitary.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Greater_Yellowlegs/lifehistory )

Money Comes Like A Turtle And Goes Like A Rabbit.

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Red-Eared Slider Turtle 

What do you get if cross a Turtle with a Giraffe?

A Turtle-Neck

Interesting Fact: Courtship and mating activities for red-eared sliders usually occur between March and July, and take place under water. During courtship, the male swims around the female and flutters or vibrates the back side of his long claws on and around her face and head, possibly to direct pheromones towards her.[29] The female swims toward the male and, if she is receptive, sinks to the bottom for mating. If the female is not receptive, she may become aggressive towards the male. Courtship can last 45 minutes, but mating takes only 10 minutes. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red-eared_slider )

The Fish Was This Big! I Swear!

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Canada Goose

What does a pig put on its paper cut?

Oinkment!

Interesting Fact:  At least 11 subspecies of Canada Goose have been recognized, although only a couple are distinctive. In general, the geese get smaller as you move northward, and darker as you go westward. The four smallest forms are now considered a different species: the Cackling Goose. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Canada_Goose/lifehistory )