I Will, I Will, Quack You!

F/6.3, 1/640, ISO 200.

Canvasback ( Female ) 

Guy in a restaurant calls a waiter over

Guy: “Waiter, I am outraged. There is one hair in my soup.”

Waiter: “And what do you expect for this price? A whole wig?!”

Interesting Fact: The breeding habitat of the canvasback is in North Americaprairie potholes. The bulky nest is built from vegetation in a marsh and lined with down. Loss of nesting habitat has caused populations to decline. The canvasback usually takes a new mate each year, pairing in late winter on ocean bays.[5] It prefers to nest over water on permanent prairie marshes surrounded by emergent vegetation, such as cattails and bulrushes, which provide protective cover. Other important breeding areas are the subarctic river deltas in Saskatchewan and the interior of Alaska. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Canvasback )

People That Take Advice From Duck Are Downright Loony

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Common Loon ( Nonbreeding adult )

What computer sings the best?

A Dell.

Interesting Fact: Loons are agile swimmers, but they move pretty fast in the air, too. Migrating loons have been clocked flying at speeds more than 70 mph. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Common_Loon/lifehistory )

I Love Escorting People… I Put An Ad Out For An Escort Service And Got A LOT Of Responses. Mostly Creeps. Made A Few Friends.

common-merganser-1

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Common Merganser

A police officer was escorting a prisoner to jail when his hat blew off.

“Shall I run and get it for you?” asked the prisoner obligingly.

“Do you think I am a fool” said the officer.

“You stand here and I’ll get it.”

Interesting Fact: The oldest Common Merganser on record was a female, and at least 13 years, 5 months old. She was banded in Oklahoma in 1938 and found in Wisconsin in 1950. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Common_Merganser/lifehistory )

I Dont Give A DUCK!

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Common Merganser ( Female )

Tom and Bob are talking:

Tom: “I managed to lose my rifle when I was in the army.”

Bob: “And…”

Tom: “I had to pay $1000 to cover the loss. I’m starting to understand why a Navy captain always goes down with his ship. ”

Interesting Fact: Often when one bird dives in a large group, the others follow the leader and disappear. They can stay under for up to 2 minutes, but they normally dive for less than 30 seconds. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Common_Merganser/lifehistory )

I Heard Of Skipping Rocks But I Never Seen A Skipping Ducks

F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 250.

Common Merganser

Did you hear the watermelon joke?

It’s pitful.

Interesting Fact: Common Mergansers spend much of their time afloat, loafing, fishing, and often sleeping on open water. They may form flocks of up to 75 individuals. They often swim in small groups along the shoreline, dipping their heads underwater to search for prey and then diving with a slight leap. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Common_Merganser/lifehistory )

Don’t Give Me That Look!

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Double-crested Cormorant

What did the sick chicken say?

Oh no! I have the people-pox!

Interesting Fact: From a distance, Double-crested Cormorants are dark birds with snaky necks, but up-close they’re quite colorful—with orange-yellow skin on their face and throat, striking aquamarine eyes that sparkle like jewels, and a mouth that is bright blue on the inside. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Double-crested_Cormorant/lifehistory )

PAUSE For A Moment And REFLECT

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Red breasted Merganser 

What did E.T.’s mother say to him when he got home?

Where on Earth have you been?

Interesting Fact: The female creates a depression on the ground that she covers with dead grasses, forming a shallow bowl. She plucks down feathers from her breast to help insulate the nest. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Red-breasted_Merganser/lifehistory )

 

 

Always Be Yourself… Unless You Can Be A Duck… Then Always Be A Duck.

F/8.0, 1/250, ISO 200. 

Red-breasted Merganser 

Two men meet on opposite sides of a river.

One shouts to the other, “I need you to help me get to the other side!”

The other guy replies, “You’re on the other side!”

Interesting Fact: Red-breasted Mergansers are among the fastest flying ducks, clocking speeds of up to 81 miles per hour.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Red-breasted_Merganser/lifehistory )

 

 

Bad Hair Day: Ain’t Nobody Got Time For That!

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 200.

Red-breasted Mergansers 

Can February March?

No, but April May.

Interesting Fact:Red-breasted Mergansers nest along forested riverbanks, marsh edges, lakeshores, coastal islands, and sandy shores with vegetation. They are never far from water. Female Red-breasted Mergansers select a spot on the ground under dense cover from low tree branches, fallen logs, or boulders. They nest alone or in colonies often with gulls and terns. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Red-breasted_Merganser/lifehistory )

 

 

In Three Words I Can Sum Up Everything I’ve Learned About Life. IT GOES ON.

F/6.3, 1/640, ISO 200.

Canvesback

What do you call it when you have your Grandma on speed dial?

Instagram

Interesting Fact: Canvasbacks are social outside of the breeding season; they gather in large rafts by the thousands to tens of thousands. Only when winter food is scarce or clumped do they defend foraging areas against other Canvasbacks. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Canvasback/lifehistory )