I’m A Biter!

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Common Loon ( Nonbreeding adult )

Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert?

Because she was stuffed.

Interesting Fact: Loons shoot through the water like a torpedo, propelled by powerful thrusts of feet located near the rear of their body. When their quarry changes direction, loons can execute an abrupt flip-turn that would make Olympic swimmers jealous: they extend one foot laterally as a pivot brake and kick with the opposite foot to turn 180 degrees in a fraction of a second. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Common_Loon/lifehistory )

 

 

It Time To Get My Beak Wet!

F/9.0, 1/250, ISO 640.

Common Loon ( Nonbreeding adult )

Where do snowmen keep their money?

In snow banks.

Interesting Fact: Loons are like airplanes in that they need a runway for takeoff. In the case of loons, they need from 30 yards up to a quarter-mile (depending on the wind) for flapping their wings and running across the top of the water in order to gain enough speed for lift-off. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Common_Loon )

CANNONBALL!!!!!!

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Common Merganser

What did the pencil say to the other pencil?

your looking sharp.

Interesting Fact: Common Mergansers spend the breeding season in northern forested habitats near large lakes and rivers. Since they nest in cavities of large trees, breeding Common Mergansers are usually found in mature forests. They spend winters on large lakes, rivers, and reservoirs in the southern and coastal regions of their breeding range, and in additional wintering grounds across the northern and western United States. They tend to prefer freshwater wintering habitat over saltwater, but they may winter in coastal bays, estuaries, and harbors. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Common_Merganser/lifehistory )

We Go Together Like Copy And Paste.

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Common Mergansers

Why can’t you trust an atom?

They make up everything.

Interesting Fact: The female chooses the nest site, which is usually in a natural cavity or woodpecker hole in a live or dead tree, up to 100 feet off the ground and within a mile of water. Common Mergansers nest less frequently in rock crevices, old sheds, chimneys, lighthouses, holes in banks, holes in the ground, hollow logs, and burrows. ( Common Merganser Life History, All About Birds, Cornell Lab of Ornithology)

 

 

Are You Loon-ely Tonight?

F/8.0, 1/250, ISO 250.

Common Loon ( Nonbreeding adult )

What do Snowmen call their offspring?

Chill-dren.

Interesting Fact: Loons are water birds, only going ashore to mate and incubate eggs. Their legs are placed far back on their bodies, allowing efficient swimming but only awkward movement on land. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Common_Loon/lifehistory )

Splash Down!

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Common Merganser 

Why was the math book so sad?

It had a lot of problems.

Interesting Fact: Common Mergansers spend much of their time afloat, loafing, fishing, and often sleeping on open water. They may form flocks of up to 75 individuals. They often swim in small groups along the shoreline, dipping their heads underwater to search for prey and then diving with a slight leap. Often when one bird dives in a large group, the others follow the leader and disappear. ( Common Merganser Life History, All About Birds, Cornell Lab of Ornithology )

 

 

Dive Dive Dive!!!

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 340.

Common Loon ( Nonbreeding adult )

Have you read the book about anti-gravity?

It’s impossible to put down!

Interesting Fact: The Common Loon is flightless for a few weeks after molting all of its wing feathers at the same time in midwinter. ( Common Loon Overview, All About Birds, Cornell Lab of Ornithology )

I Will, I Will, Quack You!

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Canvasback ( Female ) 

Guy in a restaurant calls a waiter over

Guy: “Waiter, I am outraged. There is one hair in my soup.”

Waiter: “And what do you expect for this price? A whole wig?!”

Interesting Fact: The breeding habitat of the canvasback is in North Americaprairie potholes. The bulky nest is built from vegetation in a marsh and lined with down. Loss of nesting habitat has caused populations to decline. The canvasback usually takes a new mate each year, pairing in late winter on ocean bays.[5] It prefers to nest over water on permanent prairie marshes surrounded by emergent vegetation, such as cattails and bulrushes, which provide protective cover. Other important breeding areas are the subarctic river deltas in Saskatchewan and the interior of Alaska. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Canvasback )

People That Take Advice From Duck Are Downright Loony

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Common Loon ( Nonbreeding adult )

What computer sings the best?

A Dell.

Interesting Fact: Loons are agile swimmers, but they move pretty fast in the air, too. Migrating loons have been clocked flying at speeds more than 70 mph. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Common_Loon/lifehistory )

I Love Escorting People… I Put An Ad Out For An Escort Service And Got A LOT Of Responses. Mostly Creeps. Made A Few Friends.

common-merganser-1

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Common Merganser

A police officer was escorting a prisoner to jail when his hat blew off.

“Shall I run and get it for you?” asked the prisoner obligingly.

“Do you think I am a fool” said the officer.

“You stand here and I’ll get it.”

Interesting Fact: The oldest Common Merganser on record was a female, and at least 13 years, 5 months old. She was banded in Oklahoma in 1938 and found in Wisconsin in 1950. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Common_Merganser/lifehistory )