I Heard Of Skipping Rocks But I Never Seen A Skipping Ducks

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Common Merganser

Did you hear the watermelon joke?

It’s pitful.

Interesting Fact: Common Mergansers spend much of their time afloat, loafing, fishing, and often sleeping on open water. They may form flocks of up to 75 individuals. They often swim in small groups along the shoreline, dipping their heads underwater to search for prey and then diving with a slight leap. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Common_Merganser/lifehistory )

Sometimes Life Isn’t All It’s Quacked Up To Be!

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Ruddy Duck

Why are trees so care free and easy going?

Because every fall, they let loose.

Interesting Fact: Ruddy Ducks breed in wetlands and reservoirs from southwestern Canada through the western United States and Mexico, as well as in scattered sites in the eastern United States and on the Caribbean islands. About 86 percent of the breeding population is concentrated in the prairie pothole region of south-central Canada and north-central United States. Their breeding habitat includes large marshes, stock ponds, reservoirs, and deep natural basins. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Ruddy_Duck/lifehistory )

Don’t Forget To Duck!

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Hooded Merganser

What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me.

Interesting Fact: On the bird family tree, Hooded Mergansers (genus Lophodytes) lie between goldeneyes (Bucephala) and the other North American mergansers (Mergus). They share many courtship behaviors and calls with both of those groups. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Hooded_Merganser/lifehistory )

Chill The Duck Out!

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Ring-necked Duck

Why did the duck go to jail?

Because he got caught selling quack.

Interesting Fact: Ring-necked Ducks on their breeding grounds occasionally get attacked by the much larger Common Loon, the Red-necked Grebe, and even the much smaller Pied-billed Grebe. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Ring-necked_Duck/lifehistory )

Do You Think I Give A Quack!

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Wood Duck

Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek?

Because he was always spotted.

Interesting Fact: Natural cavities for nesting are scarce, and the Wood Duck readily uses nest boxes provided for it. If nest boxes are placed too close together, many females lay eggs in the nests of other females. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Wood_Duck )

Swim Your Worries Away!

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Northern Shoveler 

A jumper cable walks into a bar.

The bartender says, “I’ll serve you, but don’t start anything.”

Interesting Fact: Northern Shovelers don’t just occur in the Americas, they also breed across Europe and spend the winter throughout Europe, Africa, and India. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Northern_Shoveler )

I Don’t Like Green Eggs And Ham! I Do Not Like Them, Sam I Am!

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Mute Swans

How do you organize an outer space party?

You planet.

Interesting Fact: The Mute Swan is reported to mate for life. However, changing of mates does occur infrequently, and swans will remate if their partner dies. If a male loses his mate and pairs with a young female, she joins him on his territory. If he mates with an older female, they go to hers. If a female loses her mate, she remates quickly and usually chooses a younger male.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Mute_Swan/lifehistory )

PhotoBomb!

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Black Scoter 

Why did the belt go to jail?

Because it held up a pair of pants!

Interesting Fact:  The Black Scoter is among the most vocal of waterfowl. Groups of Black Scoters often can be located by the constant mellow, plaintive whistling sound of the males.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Black_Scoter )

The Darkness That Surrounds Us Cannot Hurt Us. It Is The Darkness In Your Own Heart You Should Fear.

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Mute Swan

Why did The Joker have to sleep with his lights on?

Because he was afraid of the Dark Knight.

Interesting Fact: Short legs placed well back on the body give Mute Swans an awkward walking gait, but the birds can run quickly if pursued and can take off from land and water, flying with head and neck extended. On the water they sometimes hold their wings slightly raised and “sail” with the wind. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Mute_Swan/lifehistory )

Do We Have A Problem Here!

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American Black Duck

What says “Quick, Quick”?

A duck with the hiccups.

Interesting Fact: If a mother is killed or separated from her brood, another Black Duck with ducklings of her own, regardless of their age, will quickly adopt the orphans. ( http://identify.whatbird.com/obj/392/_/American_Black_Duck.aspx )