Don’t Act Like You’re Not Impressed

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Boston Terriers

What did the dog say to the hot dog bun?

“Are you pure bred?”

Interesting Fact: Judge weighed over 27.5 pounds (12.5 kg). The offspring interbred with one or more French Bulldogs, providing the foundation for the Boston Terrier. Bred down in size from fighting dogs of the Bull and Terrier types, the Boston Terrier originally weighed up to 44 pounds (20 kg) (Olde Boston Bulldogge).[2] The breed was first shown in Boston in 1870. By 1889 the breed had become sufficiently popular in Boston that fanciers formed the American Bull Terrier Club, the breed’s nickname, “roundheads”. Shortly after, at the suggestion of James Watson (a noted writer and authority), the club changed its name to the Boston Terrier Club and in 1893 it was admitted to membership in the American Kennel Club, thus making it the first US breed to be recognized.[8] It is one of a small number of breeds to have originated in the United States. The Boston Terrier was the first non-sporting dog bred in the US. ( https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boston_Terrier )

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I May Look Like I’m Having Deep Thoughts, But Really I Need To Fart.

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Semipalmated Sandpiper

Why do scuba divers fall backwards into the water?

Because if they fell forwards they’d still be in the boat.

Interesting Fact:  Semipalmated Sandpipers from eastern populations probably undertake nonstop transoceanic flights of 3,000 – 4,000 km (1,900 – 2,500 mi) from New England and southern Canada to South America, powered by extensive fat reserves. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Semipalmated_Sandpiper/lifehistory )

 

Gone Fishing!

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Osprey

What did the fish say when he posted bail?

“I’m off the hook!”

Interesting Fact:  The Osprey is the only hawk on the continent that eats almost exclusively live fish. In North America, more than 80 species of live fresh- and saltwater fish account for 99 percent of the Osprey’s diet. Captured fish usually measure about 6–13 inches in length and weigh one-third to two-thirds of a pound. The largest catch on record weighed about 2.5 pounds.  (  https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Osprey/lifehistory )

Let The Sea Set You Free.

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Common Terns

Why was the math textbook so sad?

He had a lot of problems!

Interesting Fact: The Common Tern is sometimes called the sea swallow. A group of common terns are collectively known as a “committee” of terns. ( http://identify.whatbird.com/mwg/_/0/identify.whatbird.com/obj/465/overview/Common_Tern.aspx )

 

I’m So Crabby!

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Atlantic Ghost Crabs

Did you hear about the crab that went to the seafood disco?

He pulled a muscle

Interesting Fact: Contrary to what many think, these creatures cannot swim in water. However, female crabs can keep themselves afloat by turning upside down in water. This is done to let the egg mass under their abdomen respire freely. ( http://www.animalspot.net/ghost-crab-sand-crab.html )

Just The Two Of Us!

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Mourning Dove

Two girlfriends are chatting:

My ex-husband was very responsible.

If anything went wrong, he was usually responsible for it.

Interesting Fact: The Mourning Dove is the most widespread and abundant game bird in North America. Every year hunters harvest more than 20 million, but the Mourning Dove remains one of our most abundant birds with a U.S. population estimated at 350 million. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Mourning_Dove/ )

 

INCOMING!!!

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Elegant Tern

What happened when a faucet, a tomato and lettuce were in a race?

The lettuce was ahead, the faucet was running and the tomato was trying to ketchup.

Interesting Fact: Approximately 90-97% of all Elegant Terns nest in one colony on Isla Rasa in the Gulf of California, Mexico. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Elegant_Tern/lifehistory )

This Is Really Hard To Swallow

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Barn Swallow

Why did the computer break up with the internet?

There was no “Connection”.

Interesting Fact: Long-distance migrant. Barn Swallows fly from North American breeding grounds to wintering areas in Central and South America. Southbound fall migration may begin by late June in Florida or early July in Massachusetts. They return as early as late January in southern California to mid-May at Alaskan breeding sites. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Barn_Swallow/lifehistory )

Oh Stop, You Making Me Blush!

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House Finch

What did one hat say to another? 

You stay here, I’ll go on a head.

Interesting Fact: House Finches nest in a variety of deciduous and coniferous trees as well as on cactus and rock ledges. They also nest in or on buildings, using sites like vents, ledges, street lamps, ivy, and hanging planters. Occasionally House Finches use the abandoned nests of other birds. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/House_Finch/lifehistory )

Fish Out Of The Water!

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Common Terns

How do birds fly?

They just wing it!

Interesting Fact: Common Terns nest in colonies on the ground in areas with loose sand, gravel, shell, or cobble pebbles typically less than 350 feet from the water. They tend to choose areas with scattered, low-growing vegetation to provide cover for chicks.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Common_Tern/lifehistory )