Easter Is The Only Time Of The Year When It’s Perfectly Safe To Put All Your Eggs In One Basket.

Happy Easter Everyone! 

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Desert Cottontail Rabbit

What did the Easter Egg say to the boiling water?

It’s going to take awhile to get me hard I just got layed by some chick!

Interesting Fact:  Many desert animals prey on cottontails, including birds of prey, mustelids, the coyote, the bobcat, the lynx, wolves, mountain lions, snakes, weasels, humans, and even squirrels, should a cottontail be injured or docile from illness.[22] Alien species, such as cats and dogs, are also known predators, and also pose a threat.[12] Southwestern Native Americans hunted them for meat but also used their fur and hides. It is also considered a game species, due to which it is hunted for sport.[12] The desert cottontail’s normal behavior upon spotting a potential predator is to freeze in place in an attempt to avoid being detected. If it determines that it is in danger, it will flee the area by hopping away in a zigzag pattern.[23] Cottontails can reach speeds of over 30 km/h (19 mph). When defending itself against small predators or other desert cottontails, it will nudge with its nose, or slap with its front paws, usually preceded by a hop straight upwards as high as two feet when threatened or taken by surprise. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Desert_cottontail )

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Don’t Be A Creep!

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Brown Creeper

Past, present and future walk into a bar.

It was tense!

Interesting Fact: The Brown Creeper spends most of its time spiraling up tree trunks in search of insects. It holds its short legs on either side of its body, with the long, curved claws hooking into the bark, and braces itself with its long, stiff tail. Both feet hop at the same time, making the bird’s head duck after each hop. Because of its specialized anatomy, the Brown Creeper rarely climbs downward: once high in a tree, it flies down to begin a new ascent at the base of a nearby tree. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Brown_Creeper/lifehistory )

Work, Really? Agian? Didn’t I Just Do That Yesturday?!

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Sandhill Crane

What do Snowmen call their offspring?

Chill-dren.

Interesting Fact: Sandhill Cranes mate for life, choosing their partners based on dancing displays. Displaying birds stretch their wings, pump their heads, bow, and leap into the air.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Sandhill_Crane/lifehistory )

Beep, Beep!

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Greater Roadrunner

Why can you never trust atoms?

They make up everything!

Interesting Fact: Roadrunners have evolved a range of adaptations to deal with the extremes of desert living. Like seabirds, they secrete a solution of highly concentrated salt through a gland just in front of each eye, which uses less water than excreting it via their kidneys and urinary tract. Moisture-rich prey including mammals and reptiles supply them otherwise-scarce water in their diet. Both chicks and adults flutter the unfeathered area beneath the chin (gular fluttering) to dissipate heat. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Greater_Roadrunner/overview

But I’m A Creep!

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Brown Creeper

Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.

Interesting Fact: Brown Creepers burn an estimated 4–10 calories (technically, kilocalories) per day, a tiny fraction of a human’s daily intake of about 2,000 kilocalories. By eating a single spider, a creeper gains enough energy to climb nearly 200 feet vertically. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Brown_Creeper )

I Woke Up Early There Was No Worm!

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Sandhill Crane

Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.

Interesting Fact: The earliest Sandhill Crane fossil, estimated to be 2.5 million years old, was unearthed in the Macasphalt Shell Pit in Florida. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Sandhill_Crane/ )

Keep Calm And Hop On!

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Desert Cottontail Rabbit

What do rabbits say before they eat?

Lettuce pray.

Interesting Fact: Due to the variable temperature of living conditions, desert cottontails must be adequate thermoregulators to minimize water loss during the hotter seasons and require shaded areas of their environment to conduct evaporative water loss through thermal heat transfer. In open-desert areas, they can withstand for a short period with extremely high temperatures of around 45 °C and have a large evaporative water loss capacity of around 1.5% body mass/hour, though cottontails can withstand longer in an ideal environment with shaded areas. To cope with evaporative heat loss, they do panting and undergo changes in production of their basal metabolic rate in relation to the ambient temperature of the environment. Ears of desert cottontails make up 14% of their body size and may help with thermoregulation. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Desert_cottontail )

Hey Bro! Want To Have A Staring Contest?!

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Sandhill Crane

What did the tie say to the hat?

You go on ahead and I’ll hang around.

Interesting Fact: The elegance of cranes has inspired people in cultures all over the world—including the great scientist, conservationist, and nature writer Aldo Leopold, who wrote of their “nobility, won in the march of aeons.”  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Sandhill_Crane/ )

You Want A Little Bit Of The Top?!

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Sandhill Crane

A guy walks into a bar with a set of jumper cables…

the bartender says, buddy, I’ll serve you as long as you don’t start anything.

Interesting Fact:  Sandhill Crane chicks can leave the nest within 8 hours of hatching, and are even capable of swimming. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Sandhill_Crane/overview )

I Am Origami Model

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Sandhill Crane

Why was the chicken afraid?

Because it was chicken.

Interesting Fact: Although some start breeding at two years of age, Sandhill Cranes may reach the age of seven before breeding. They mate for life—which can mean two decades or more—and stay with their mates year-round. Juveniles stick close by their parents for 9 or 10 months after hatching. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Sandhill_Crane/lifehistory )