F/ 5.6, 1/500, ISO 100.
Caspian Tern
Why did the cookie go to the hospital?
Because he felt crummy.
Interesting Fact: The Caspian Tern aggressively defends its breeding colony. It will pursue, attack, and chase potential predatory birds, and can cause bloody wounds on the heads of people who invade the colony. The entire colony will take flight, however, when a Bald Eagle flies overhead, exposing the chicks to predation from gulls. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Caspian_Tern/overview )
F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 200.
Dragonfly
What do you get when you cross a parrot with a shark?
An animal that talks your head off.
Interesting Fact: Old and unreliable claims are made that dragonflies such as the southern giant darner can fly up to 60 miles per hour (97 km/h).[50] However, the greatest reliable flight speed records are for other types of insects.[51] In general, large dragonflies like the hawkers have a maximum speed of 10–15 metres per second (22–34 mph) with average cruising speed of about 4.5 metres per second (10 mph).[52] Dragonflies can fly at 100 body-lengths per second, and three lengths per second backwards. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dragonfly#Flight )
GoPro Camera
Parasailing in Dominican Republic
A man jumps out of an airplane with a parachute on his back. As he’s falling, he realizes hiss chute is broken. He doesn’t know anything about parachutes, but as the earth rapidly approaches, he realizes his options are limited; he takes off the parachute and tries to fix it himself on the way down. The wind is ripping past his face, he’s dropping like a rock, and at 5000 feet, another man goes shooting up past him. In desperation, the man with the chute looks up and yells, “Hey do you know anything about parachutes?!”
The guy flying up looks down and yells, “No, do you know anything about gas stoves?!”
Interesting Fact: The first ascending-gliding parachute was developed by Pierre-Marcel Lemoigne in 1962.[1][2] The same year, Lemoigne established an Aeronautical Training Center to introduce his new ascending-gliding parachute as a training tool for parachutists. The technique allows parachutists to train more efficiently by towing the parachutist to a suitable altitude, then releasing them to practice landings. This training method proved cheaper than—and just as effective as—an airplane. In 1963 Jacques-André Istel from Pioneer Parachute Company bought a license from Lemoigne to manufacture and sell the 24-gore ascending-gliding parachute which was trade-named “parasail.” ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parasailing#History )
F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 200.
Brown Pelicans
What did the bra say to the hat?
You go on a head, and I’ll give these two a lift.
Interesting Fact: During a dive, the Brown Pelican tucks its head and rotates its body to the left. This maneuver is probably to cushion the trachea and esophagus—which are found on the right side of the neck—from the impact. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Brown_Pelican )
F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 1250
Bald Eagle
Did you hear the joke about the roof?
Never mind, it’s over your head!
Interesting Fact: The Bald Eagle has been the national emblem of the United States since 1782 and a spiritual symbol for native people for far longer than that. These regal birds aren’t really bald, but their white-feathered heads gleam in contrast to their chocolate-brown body and wings. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Bald_Eagle )
F/11.0, 1/500, ISO 125.
Osprey
In class:
Math Teacher: “If I have 5 bottles in one hand and 6 in the other hand, what do I have?”
Student: “A drinking problem.”
Interesting Fact: Osprey eggs do not hatch all at once. Rather, the first chick emerges up to five days before the last one. The older hatchling dominates its younger siblings, and can monopolize the food brought by the parents. If food is abundant, chicks share meals in relative harmony; in times of scarcity, younger ones may starve to death. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Osprey )
F/6.3, 1/500, ISO 280.
Hooded Merganser ( Male )
A police officer stops a Bob’s car.
Police Officer: “Your driver’s license please.”
Bob: “I’m really sorry, I forgot.”
Officer: “At home?”
Bob: “No, to do it.”
Interesting Fact:They take flight by running across the water, flying with fast wingbeats and never gliding until they are about to land (by skidding to a stop on the water). ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Hooded_Merganser/lifehistory )
F/6.3, 1/2500, ISO 320.
Red-tailed Hawk
One day a man came home from work to find his wife crying hysterically in the kitchen.
“What’s wrong, dearest?” asked the confused husband.
“Oh darling,” sobbed the wife,
“I was cleaning little Jen’s room when I found whips, handcuffs and chains under her bed, along with a very erotic porn magazine! What ever are we going to do?”
“Well,” replied the man, “I guess a spanking is out of the question?”
Interesting Fact: The oldest known wild Red-tailed Hawk was at least 30 years, 8 months old when it was found in Michigan in 2011, the same state where it had been banded in 1981. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Red-tailed_Hawk/overview )
F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 250.
Common Merganser
Did you hear the watermelon joke?
It’s pitful.
Interesting Fact: Common Mergansers spend much of their time afloat, loafing, fishing, and often sleeping on open water. They may form flocks of up to 75 individuals. They often swim in small groups along the shoreline, dipping their heads underwater to search for prey and then diving with a slight leap. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Common_Merganser/lifehistory )
F/11.0, 1/500, ISO 320.
Northern Harrier
A camel meets an elephant.
The elephant asks jokingly: “Why do you have two breasts on your back?”
The camel replies: “With a face like yours, I’d just shut up.”
Interesting Fact: Northern Harriers are the most owl-like of hawks (though they’re not related to owls). They rely on hearing as well as vision to capture prey. The disk-shaped face looks and functions much like an owl’s, with stiff facial feathers helping to direct sound to the ears. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Northern_Harrier )
