I’m Over Here!

F/13.0, 1/640, ISO 320.

Double-crested Cormorant

Teacher called on a student in the classroom:

Teacher: Name two days of the week that start with “t”.

Student: Today and Tomorrow

Interesting Fact: Double-crested Cormorant nests often are exposed to direct sun. Adults shade the chicks and also bring them water, pouring it from their mouths into those of the chicks. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Double-crested_Cormorant/lifehistory )

I’ve Always Loved The Idea Of Not Being What People Expect Me To Be

F/ 6.3, 1/160, ISO 200.

Willow Flycatcher

A termite walks into a bar and asks

“Is the bar tender here?”

Interesting Fact: Flycatchers don’t learn their songs from their parents like many other birds. Instead flycatchers hatch knowing their songs. Scientists tested this by raising Willow Flycatchers in captivity while letting them listen to an Alder Flycatcher sing its free beer song. Despite hearing this song all day, Willow chicks grew up to sing their species’ own fitz-bew. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Willow_Flycatcher/lifehistory )

That’s Not A Wild Goose Chase. That’s Bingo.

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 400.

Domestic Geese in Wild

Which two letters in the alphabet are always jealous?

NV.

Interesting Fact: In Europe, northern Africa, and western Asia, the original domesticated geese are derived from the greylag goose Anser anser. In eastern Asia, the original domesticated geese are derived from the swan goose Anser cygnoides; these are commonly known as Chinese geese. Both have been widely introduced in more recent times, and modern flocks in both areas (and elsewhere, such as Australia and North America) may consist of either species, and/or hybrids between them. Chinese geese may be readily distinguished from European geese by the large knob at the base of the bill, though hybrids may exhibit every degree of variation between them. ( https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Domestic_goose )

Money Comes Like A Turtle And Goes Like A Rabbit.

F/11.0, 1/500, ISO 250.

Red-Eared Slider Turtle 

What do you get if cross a Turtle with a Giraffe?

A Turtle-Neck

Interesting Fact: Courtship and mating activities for red-eared sliders usually occur between March and July, and take place under water. During courtship, the male swims around the female and flutters or vibrates the back side of his long claws on and around her face and head, possibly to direct pheromones towards her.[29] The female swims toward the male and, if she is receptive, sinks to the bottom for mating. If the female is not receptive, she may become aggressive towards the male. Courtship can last 45 minutes, but mating takes only 10 minutes. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red-eared_slider )

It’s Electrifying!

F/8.0, 1/1000, ISO 200.

Monk Parakeets

What do you get when you cross a parrot and a centipede?

A walkie-talkie.

Interesting Fact: Monk Parakeets in North America live in urban and suburban environments, especially around city parks. They are one of the few parrot species able to survive temperate-zone winters. In their native range in South America, Monk Parakeets live in dry savannas with scattered woods up to about 6,000 feet elevation.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Monk_Parakeet/lifehistory )

Next Time I Am Wearing Green!

F/6.3, 1/ 160, ISO 320.

Chipping Sparrow

How do farmers party?

They turnip the beets.

Interesting Fact: The early naturalists had a gift for description you just don’t see anymore. In 1929, Edward Forbush called the Chipping Sparrow “the little brown-capped pensioner of the dooryard and lawn, that comes about farmhouse doors to glean crumbs shaken from the tablecloth by thrifty housewives.” ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Chipping_Sparrow/lifehistory )

Don’t You Think We Should Go Wireless?!

F/11.0, 1/500, ISO 250.

Barn Swallow

Husband and Wife are having a conversation.

Wife: How many women have u slept with?

Husband: Only you darling, I was awake with the other women.

Interesting Fact: The Barn Swallow is the most abundant and widely distributed swallow species in the world. It breeds throughout the Northern Hemisphere and winters in much of the Southern Hemisphere. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Barn_Swallow/lifehistory )

 

 

Basic Maneuvers!

F/11.0, 1/500, ISO  320.

Laughing Gull

Why is a river rich?

It has banks on both sides.

Interesting Fact:  The adult Laughing Gull removes the eggshells from the nest after the eggs hatch. If the shells are not removed, a piece can become lodged on top of the slightly smaller unhatched third egg and prevent it from hatching. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Laughing_Gull/lifehistory )

Pleeeease!

F/6.3, 1/160, ISO 320.

Chipmunk

Why don’t chipmunks wear skinny jeans?

Because their nuts won’t fit.

Interesting Fact: Chipmunks generally gather food on the ground in areas with underbrush, rocks, and logs, where they can hide from predators like hawks, foxes, coyotes, weasels, and snakes. They feed on insects, nuts, berries, seeds, fruit, and grain which they stuff into their generous cheek pouches and carry to their burrow or nest to store. ( http://www.nationalgeographic.com/animals/mammals/group/chipmunks/ )

I Don’t Need Therapy, I Need A Hug!

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 100.

Double-crested Cormorant

Tom had asked Fred to help him out with the deck after work, so Fred went straight over to Tom’s place. When they got to the door, Tom went straight to his wife, gave her a hug and told her how beautiful she was and how much he had missed her at work.
When it was time for dinner, he complimented his wife on her cooking, kissed her and told her how much he loved her. Once they were working on the deck, Fred told Tom that he was surprised that he fussed so much over his wife. Tom said that he’d started this about 6 months ago, it had revived their marriage and things couldn’t be better.
Fred thought he’d give it a go. When he got home, he gave his wife a massive hug, kissed her and told her that he loved her. His wife burst into tears. Fred was confused and asked why she was crying.
She said, “This is the worst day of my life. First, little Bobby fell off his bike and twisted his ankle. Then, the washing machine broke and flooded the basement. And now, you come home drunk!”

Interesting Fact: The double-crest of the Double-crested Cormorant is only visible on adults during breeding season. The crests are white in cormorants from Alaska, and black in other regions.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Double-crested_Cormorant/lifehistory )