Don’t You Flap Your Wings At Me!

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 320.

Hooded Merganser

In School

Teacher: “If I gave you 2 cats and another 2 cats and another 2, how many would you have?”
Bob: “Seven.”
Teacher: “No, listen carefully… If I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?”
Bob: “Seven.”
Teacher: “Let me put it to you differently. If I gave you two apples, and another two apples and another two, how many would you have?”
Bob: “Six.”
Teacher: “Good. Now if I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?”
Bob: “Seven!”
Teacher: “Bob, where in the heck do you get seven from?!”
Bob: “Because I’ve already got a freaking cat!”

Interesting Fact:  The Hooded Merganser is the second-smallest of the six living species of mergansers (only the Smew of Eurasia is smaller) and is the only one restricted to North America. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Hooded_Merganser/lifehistory )

Hey There Ace!

F/6.3, 1/500, ISO 220.

Brant Goose

What did the big flower say to the little one?

You’re really growing, bud!

Interesting Fact: The oldest recorded Brant was a female, and was over 27 years, 6 months old. It had been banded in Alaska and was found in Washington. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Brant )

It’s Been A Rough Week So Far… But On Positive Note, I Didn’t Need Any Bail Money And Didn’t Have To Hide Any Bodies!

F/6.3, 1/800, ISO 800.

Rough-legged Hawk

Daughter: “Mom, where do tampons go?”

Mom: “Where the babies come from, darling.”

Daughter “In the stork?”

Check out this really funny jokes: http://www.short-funny.com/#ixzz5540ew6c6

Interesting Fact: The Rough-legged Hawk’s cliffside nest, a bulky mass of sticks, sometimes contains caribou bones. Nesting pairs need a lot of space: usually only a single pair will nest on a quarter-mile-long cliff. However, the pair may nest within 100 feet of Gyrfalcons, Peregrine Falcons, or Common Ravens. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Rough-legged_Hawk/lifehistory  )

I Lost My Temper, But It Came Back!

F/9.0, 1/250, ISO 160.

Ring-necked Duck

Why did the cookie go to the hospital?

He felt crummy!

Interesting Fact: Ring-necked Ducks feed by diving underwater, rather than by tipping up as “dabbling” ducks do. When diving, they leap forward in an arc to plunge underwater, and they swim using only their feet for propulsion. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Ring-necked_Duck/lifehistory )

 

 

Catching Some Rays And Then Making Some Waves!

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 100.

California Sea Lion

What do you call a seal in the desert?

Lost.

Interesting Fact:  The California sea lion is a sleek animal, faster than any other sea lion or seal. These eared seals top out at speeds of some 25 miles (40 kilometers) an hour. ( http://animals.nationalgeographic.com/animals/mammals/california-sea-lion/ )

Gonzo Would Be Jealous!

F/7.1, 1/800, ISO 200.

Whimbrel

What Do You Call a Beach that Keeps Losing Sand?

A Shore Loser.

Interesting Fact: In many regions, the primary winter food of the Whimbrel is crab. The curve of the Whimbrel’s bill nicely matches the shape of fiddler crab burrows. The bird reaches into the crab’s burrow, extracts the crab, washes it if it is muddy, and sometimes breaks off the claws and legs before swallowing it. Indigestible parts are excreted in fecal pellets.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Whimbrel/lifehistory )

 

I Would Cry But Mascara Is Designer

green-winged-teal

F/6.3, 1/500, ISO 360.

Green-Winged Teal

Men are like mascara, any sign of emotion and they’re running.

Interesting Fact: Green-winged Teals have closely spaced, comblike projections called lamellae around the inner edge of the bill. They use them to filter tiny invertebrates from the water, allowing the birds to capture smaller food items than other dabbling ducks. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Green-winged_Teal/lifehistory )

Use Your Head!

yellow-bellied-sapsucker-2

F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 400.

Yellow-Bellied Sapsucker

What did the trees wear to Mother Nature’s pool party?

Swimming trunks!

Interesting Fact: The Yellow-bellied Sapsucker frequently uses human-produced materials to help in its territorial drumming. Street signs and metal chimney flashing amplify the irregular tapping of a territorial sapsucker. The sapsucker seems to suffer no ill effects of whacking its bill on metal, and a bird will return to a favorite sign day after day to pound out its Morse code-like message. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Yellow-bellied_Sapsucker/lifehistory  )

I Am Going To Wing It!

double-crested-cormorant

F/ 5.6, 1/500, ISO 220.

Double-crested Cormorant

What do you call a fly without wings?

A walk

Interesting Fact: Accumulated fecal matter below nests can kill the nest trees. When this happens, the cormorants may move to a new area or they may simply shift to nesting on the ground. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Double-crested_Cormorant/lifehistory )

Here’s Looking At You, Kid

F/11.0, 1/500, ISO 320.

Red-tailed Hawk

Why can you never trust atoms?

They make up everything!

Interesting Fact: Birds are amazingly adapted for life in the air. The Red-tailed Hawk is one of the largest birds you’ll see in North America, yet even the biggest females weigh in at only about 3 pounds. A similar-sized small dog might weigh 10 times that. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Red-tailed_Hawk/lifehistory )