Bad Hair Day: Ain’t Nobody Got Time For That!

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 200.

Red-breasted Mergansers 

Can February March?

No, but April May.

Interesting Fact:Red-breasted Mergansers nest along forested riverbanks, marsh edges, lakeshores, coastal islands, and sandy shores with vegetation. They are never far from water. Female Red-breasted Mergansers select a spot on the ground under dense cover from low tree branches, fallen logs, or boulders. They nest alone or in colonies often with gulls and terns. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Red-breasted_Merganser/lifehistory )

 

 

Don’t Look Back You’re Not Going That Way

F/5.6, 1/500, ISO 220.

Least Sandpiper

Browsing in a pet shop, a man sees a beautiful parrot with a red
string tied to its left leg and a green string tied to its right
leg, and asks the store owner about the different colored strings.
“This is a highly-trained parrot,” the owner explains. “If you
pull the red string, he’ll speak French.  If you pull the green
string, he’ll speak Spanish.”
The customer asks, “What happens if I pull both strings?”
“I’ll fall off my perch, dummy!” screeches the parrot.

Interesting Fact: Eastern populations probably fly nonstop over the ocean from the Gulf of St. Lawrence and New England to wintering grounds in northeastern South America, a distance of about 1,800 to 2,500 miles. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Least_Sandpiper/lifehistory )

 

Touchdown!

F/11.0, 1/500, ISO 400.

Ring-billed Gull 

What should you do if you’re afraid of elevators?

Take steps to avoid them.

Interesting Fact: Ring-billed Gulls are strong, graceful flyers. They can race along at more than 40 miles per hour, and they’re adept at snatching food from the air. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Ring-billed_Gull/lifehistory )

The Awkward Moment When You’re In Deep Thought, Then Realize You’re Staring Directly at Someone…

F/11.0, 1/500, ISO 400.

Ring-billed Gull 

Two guys are talking:

Guy 1: I’m on a .

Guy 2: Really.

Guy 1: I’ve lost three days already.

Interesting Fact: Some Ring-billed Gull nests at study sites in California and Oregon contained pebbles the size and shape of gull eggs. The parents apparently pulled the pebbles into their nests from the surrounding ground, mistaking them for eggs gone astray. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Ring-billed_Gull/lifehistory )

 

 

Sometimes I Get Road Rage From Standing In Lines.

F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 125.

Semipalmated Sandpipers

Why do ghosts ride in elevators?

It keeps their spirits up.

Interesting Fact: Semipalmated Sandpiper: Breeds in lower Arctic regions from western Alaska to Labrador. Migrates through central North America to the Atlantic coast to reach its wintering grounds, which extend from the extreme southern U.S. to the Caribbean Islands and South America. Preferred habitats include shorelines and mudflats. ( http://identify.whatbird.com/obj/427/overview/Semipalmated_Sandpiper.aspx )

 

I May Look Like I’m Having Deep Thoughts, But Really I Need To Fart.

F/13.0, 1/640, ISO 400.

Semipalmated Sandpiper

Why do scuba divers fall backwards into the water?

Because if they fell forwards they’d still be in the boat.

Interesting Fact:  Semipalmated Sandpipers from eastern populations probably undertake nonstop transoceanic flights of 3,000 – 4,000 km (1,900 – 2,500 mi) from New England and southern Canada to South America, powered by extensive fat reserves. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Semipalmated_Sandpiper/lifehistory )

 

Gone Fishing!

F/11.0, 1/500, ISO 125.

Osprey

What did the fish say when he posted bail?

“I’m off the hook!”

Interesting Fact:  The Osprey is the only hawk on the continent that eats almost exclusively live fish. In North America, more than 80 species of live fresh- and saltwater fish account for 99 percent of the Osprey’s diet. Captured fish usually measure about 6–13 inches in length and weigh one-third to two-thirds of a pound. The largest catch on record weighed about 2.5 pounds.  (  https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Osprey/lifehistory )

Keep Calm And Quack On!

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 200.

Red-breasted Merganser  

A motorist in a B.M.W. was driving through the countryside on a beautiful Saturday afternoon, having a lovely time, when he came to an area of the road that was covered with a rather large puddle of water from a previous rain storm. Worried that he was going to damage the car and its engine in the deep water, he spotted a nearby farmer and asked how deep the water was. “Arr”, said the local farmer “That water only be a few inches deep!” Relieved, the motorist edged his car into the water, expecting to come out the other side in no time. Instead, as he drove in, the water came right up the side of the car, and the engine sputtered to a halt. Sitting there in his soaking wet luxury car, the motorist yelled at the local angrily: “I thought you said this water was only a few inches deep!!!” “Well,” replied the local farmer “It only come up to the waist of them there ducks!”

Interesting Fact: It prefers salt water more than the other two species of merganser. ( http://identify.whatbird.com/obj/115/overview/Red-breasted_Merganser.aspx )

Why You All Up In My Business!

osprey

F/5.6, 1/500, ISO200.

Osprey

What does the man in the moon do when his hair gets too long?

Eclipse it!

Interesting Fact: Ospreys hunt by diving to the water’s surface from some 30 to 100 feet (9 to 30 meters) up. They have gripping pads on their feet to help them pluck fish from the water with their curved claws and carry them for great distances. In flight, ospreys will orient the fish headfirst to ease wind resistance. ( https://www.nationalgeographic.com/animals/birds/o/osprey/ )

Gonzo Would Be Jealous!

F/7.1, 1/800, ISO 200.

Whimbrel

What Do You Call a Beach that Keeps Losing Sand?

A Shore Loser.

Interesting Fact: In many regions, the primary winter food of the Whimbrel is crab. The curve of the Whimbrel’s bill nicely matches the shape of fiddler crab burrows. The bird reaches into the crab’s burrow, extracts the crab, washes it if it is muddy, and sometimes breaks off the claws and legs before swallowing it. Indigestible parts are excreted in fecal pellets.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Whimbrel/lifehistory )