I Can Freeze Time! What’s Your Superpower?

F/5.6, 1/800, ISO 320.

Anna’s Hummingbird ( Female )

Two pickles fell out of a jar onto the floor.

What did one say to the other?

Dill with it.

Interesting Fact: Hummingbirds have tiny legs and can neither hop nor walk, though they can sort of scoot sideways while perched.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Annas_Hummingbird )

I’m Gonna Tell You Again STOP HUMMING!

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F/6.3, 1/125, ISO 100.

Rufous Hummingbird

What do you do with a sick boat?

Take it to the doc.

Interesting Fact: The Rufous Hummingbird has an excellent memory for location, no doubt helping it find flowers from day to day, or even year to year. Some birds have been seen returning from migration and investigating where a feeder had been the previous year, even though it had since been moved. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Rufous_Hummingbird/lifehistory )

I’m Not Trying To Impress You Or Anything, But I Can Swim Without Floaties.

western-grebe-1

F/7.1, 1/800, ISO 200.

Western Grebe

A man was stranded on a desert island for 10 years.
One day a beautiful girl swims to shore in a wet suit.
Man: “Hi! Am I ever happy to see you.”!
Girl: “Hi! It seems like you’ve been here along time. How long has it been since you’ve had a cigarette?”
Man: “It’s been ten years!”
With this information the girl unzips a slot on the arm of her wet suit and gives the man cigarette.
Man: “Oh thank you so much!”
Girl: “So tell me how long its been since you had a drink?”
Man: “It’s been ten years” The girl unzips a little longer zipper on her wet suit and comes out with a flask of whiskey and gives the man a drink.
Man: “Oh. Thank you so much. You are like a miracle”!
Finally the girl starts to unzip the front of her wet suit and asks the man leadingly, “So tell me then, have you been bored?”
The man looked at her and said excitedly: “Oh, my God, don’t tell me you’ve got a surfboard in there too?”

 

Interesting Fact: Western Grebes breed on freshwater lakes and marshes with extensive open water bordered by emergent vegetation. During winter they move to saltwater or brackish bays, estuaries, or sheltered sea coasts and are less frequently found on freshwater lakes or rivers. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Western_Grebe/lifehistory )

Hold It Until We Find A Clean Car!

F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 200. 

Brown Pelican

How do you make holy water?

Boil the hell out of it!

Interesting Fact: Though they have an awkward gait on land, Brown Pelicans are strong swimmers and masterful fliers. They fly to and from their fishing grounds in V-formations or lines just above the water’s surface. They and the closely related Peruvian Pelican are the only pelican species to perform spectacular head-first dives (typically ending in a huge splash visible from far away) to trap fish.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Brown_Pelican/lifehistory )

Gonzo Would Be Jealous!

F/7.1, 1/800, ISO 200.

Whimbrel

What Do You Call a Beach that Keeps Losing Sand?

A Shore Loser.

Interesting Fact: In many regions, the primary winter food of the Whimbrel is crab. The curve of the Whimbrel’s bill nicely matches the shape of fiddler crab burrows. The bird reaches into the crab’s burrow, extracts the crab, washes it if it is muddy, and sometimes breaks off the claws and legs before swallowing it. Indigestible parts are excreted in fecal pellets.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Whimbrel/lifehistory )

 

I Wish Exerciseing Was As Easy As Eating!

F/5.6, 1/2000, ISO 320.

Anna’s Hummingbird ( Female )

What do you call a crocodile that likes to bowl?

An Alley-Gator

Interesting Fact:  On rare occasions, bees and wasps may become impaled on the bill of an Anna’s Hummingbird, causing the bird to starve to death. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Annas_Hummingbird )

Sometimes Sitting Still Is The Best Move You Can Make.

F/6.3, 1/160, ISO 160.

Prairie Falcon

What do you get when you put a candle in a suit of armor?

A knight light.

Interesting Fact: Prairie Falcons are among the species of birds that seem to play—they’ve been seen dropping dried cow manure in midair and then diving to catch it. Like young ball players flipping a baseball to themselves, this may be a way to sharpen their coordination skills. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Prairie_Falcon/overview )

Are You Looking At Me?!

F/5.6, 1/80, ISO 320.

California Scrub-Jay

How did the barber win the race?

He knew a short cut.

Interesting Fact: You might see California Scrub-Jays standing on the back of a mule deer. They’re eating ticks and other parasites. The deer seem to appreciate the help, often standing still and holding up their ears to give the jays access. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/California_Scrub-Jay/overview )

We Get Frequent Flyer Points

F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 200.

Brown Pelicans

What did the bra say to the hat?

You go on a head, and I’ll give these two a lift.

Interesting Fact: During a dive, the Brown Pelican tucks its head and rotates its body to the left. This maneuver is probably to cushion the trachea and esophagus—which are found on the right side of the neck—from the impact. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Brown_Pelican )

Just Sit And Enjoy The View!

F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 320.

Castello di Amorosa, Calistoga, CA 

Where does spaghetti go to dance?

The Meatball.

Interesting Fact: Castello di Amorosa is a castle and a winery located near Calistoga, California. First opening its doors to the public in April 2007, the castle is the project of 4th generation vintner, Dario Sattui, who also owns and operates the V. Sattui Winery named after his great-grandfather, Vittorio Sattui, who originally established a winery in San Francisco in 1885 after emigrating from Italy to California. ( Castello di Amorosa – Wikipedia )