Fly By!

F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 200.

Great Egret

Bobby went in to a pet shop.

Bobby: “Can I buy a goldfish?”

The Sales Guy: “Do you want an aquarium?”

Bobby: “I don’t care what star sign it is.”

Interesting Fact: The oldest known Great Egret was 22 years, 10 months old and was banded in Ohio. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Great_Egret )

Cliffhanger!

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 160.

Green Heron

Why did the soccer player bring string to the game?

So he could tie the score.

Interesting Fact: The oldest Green Heron on record was at least 7 years, 11 months old when it was found in Mexico in 1979. It had been banded in Oklahoma in 1971. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Green_Heron )

You Surprised Me Like A Shart.

F/6.3, 1/500, ISO 220.

Hooded Merganser ( Female )

Why is chicken soccer match a bad idea?

There are too many fowls.

Interesting Fact: Hooded Merganser ducklings leave their nest cavity within 24 hours of hatching. First, their mother checks the area around the nest and calls to the nestlings from ground level. From inside the nest, the little fluffballs scramble up to the entrance hole and then flutter to the ground, which may be 50 feet or more below them. In some cases they have to walk half a mile or more with their mother to the nearest body of water. ( Hooded Merganser Overview, All About Birds, Cornell Lab of Ornithology )

Do You Feel Ducky, Punk!

F/13.0, 1/640, ISO 400.

Hooded Merganser Male

Where do you take a sick boat?

To the dock.

Interesting Fact: Unlike dabbling ducks, Hooded Mergansers swim low in the water. Their legs are far back on their bodies, which helps in diving but makes them awkward on land. They take flight by running across the water, flying with fast wingbeats and never gliding until they are about to land (by skidding to a stop on the water). ( Hooded Merganser Life History, All About Birds, Cornell Lab of Ornithology )

 

 

Haters Will See You Walking On Water And Say It Is Because You Can’t Swim

F/11.0, 1/500, ISO 250.

Great Egret

Worker calls in to his Boss:

Worker: I can’t come to work today. I’m sick

Boss: Oh yea! What’s wrong with you now?

Worker: I have anal glaucoma.

Boss: What the hell is that?

Worker: I just can’t see my ass working today.

Interesting Fact: Great Egrets fly slowly but powerfully: with just two wingbeats per second their cruising speed is around 25 miles an hour. ( http://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/great_egret/lifehistory )

Believe You Can And You’re Halfway There.

F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 400.

Dark-eyed Junco

Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

In case he got a hole in one.

Interesting Fact: The female chooses the nest site, typically in a depression or niche on sloping ground, rock face, or amid the tangled roots of an upturned tree. Around people, juncos may nest in or underneath buildings. Occasionally, juncos nest above the ground on horizontal branches (rarely as high as 45 feet), window ledges, and in hanging flower pots or light fixtures. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Dark-eyed_Junco/lifehistory )

I Solemnly Swear I Am Up To No Good!

F/9.0, 1/125, ISO 320.

Black-crowned Night-Heron

Guest at a restaurant: “I refuse to eat this roast beef. Please call the manager! “

Waiter: “That’s no use. He won’t eat it either.”

Interesting Fact: Black-crowned Night Heron nest in groups that often include other species, including herons, egrets, and ibises. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Black-crowned_Night-Heron )

Monday Blues

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 400.

Eastern Bluebird 

Where does Capitan Hook go shopping?

Second hand stores.

Interesting Fact: Eastern Bluebirds eat mostly insects, wild fruit and berries. Occasionally, Eastern Bluebirds have also been observed capturing and eating larger prey items such as shrews, salamanders, snakes, lizards and tree frogs. ( Eastern Bluebird Overview, All About Birds, Cornell Lab of Ornithology )

 

 

I’m A Duck That Does Not Give A Quack!

F/6.3, 1/500, ISO 250.

Hooded Merganser ( Female )

2 Guys walking down the street.

One walks into a bar, the other ducks.

Interesting Fact:  The female chooses the nest site, and may start scouting for next year’s tree cavity at the end of each breeding season. Nest cavities can be in live or dead trees and are usually close to water. Cavities are typically 10–50 feet off the ground, up to about 90 feet. Hooded Mergansers nest readily in boxes, preferring those with wood shavings or nest material from previous uses. They prefer cavities with 3–5 inch openings. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Hooded_Merganser/overview )

Flying Quack!

F/6.3, 1/500, ISO 280.

Hooded Merganser ( Male ) 

A police officer stops a Bob’s car.

Police Officer: “Your driver’s license please.”

Bob: “I’m really sorry, I forgot.”

Officer: “At home?”

Bob: “No, to do it.”

Interesting Fact:They take flight by running across the water, flying with fast wingbeats and never gliding until they are about to land (by skidding to a stop on the water). ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Hooded_Merganser/lifehistory )