Catch Me If You Can!

F/5.6, 1/500, ISO 200.

Great Egret

What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.

Interesting Fact: Though it mainly hunts while wading, the Great Egret occasionally swims to capture prey or hovers (somewhat laboriously) over the water and dips for fish. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Great_Egret

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You Are Young. So Shut Up, And Enjoy Life.

F/5.6, 1/500, ISO 400.

Yellow-crowned Night-Heron ( Juvenile ) 

Why was the baby strawberry crying?

Because her mom and dad were in a jam

Interesting Fact: Foraging birds stand still or slowly stalk crabs and other prey along shorelines, marshes, and fields. Once in striking range they lunge at their prey and seize it in their bill. They swallow small prey whole, but often shake apart, crush, or spear larger prey. They forage on their own, typically keeping other individuals at a distance of 15 feet or more. Courting Yellow-crowned Night-Herons make display flights around their colonies, sometimes with the neck conspicuously extended. Courting pairs make a neck-stretching display, slowly raising and then quickly pushing the head back between its shoulders, while fanning the long shoulder plumes. Males do this first and females sometimes follow. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Yellow-crowned_Night-Heron )

Shh… I’m Hiding From Negative People.

F/6.3, 1/160, ISO 160.

Green Heron

Why won’t sharks attack lawyers?

Professional courtesy!

Interesting Fact: Occasionally Green Herons hunt in deeper water by plunging on prey from above. They hunt at all times of the day and night in the shallows of swamps, creeks, marshes, ditches, ponds, and mangroves. They usually forage among thick vegetation in water that is less than 4 inches deep, avoiding the deeper and more open areas frequented by longer-legged herons. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Green_Heron/lifehistory )

Cliffhanger!

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 160.

Green Heron

Why did the soccer player bring string to the game?

So he could tie the score.

Interesting Fact: The oldest Green Heron on record was at least 7 years, 11 months old when it was found in Mexico in 1979. It had been banded in Oklahoma in 1971. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Green_Heron )

Fish Tremble When They Hear My Name!

F/8.0, 1/200, ISO 160.

Green Heron

When do zombies go to sleep?

When they are dead tired.

Interesting Fact:  Green Herons eat mainly small fish such as minnows, sunfish, catfish, pickerel, carp, perch, gobies, shad, silverside, eels, and goldfish. They also feeds on insects, spiders, crustaceans, snails, amphibians, reptiles, and rodents. They hunt by standing still at the water’s edge, in vegetation, or by walking slowly in shallow water. When a fish approaches, the heron lunges and darts its head, grasping (or sometimes spearing) the fish with its heavy bill. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Green_Heron/lifehistory )

Fly By!

F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 200.

Great Egret

Bobby went in to a pet shop.

Bobby: “Can I buy a goldfish?”

The Sales Guy: “Do you want an aquarium?”

Bobby: “I don’t care what star sign it is.”

Interesting Fact: The oldest known Great Egret was 22 years, 10 months old and was banded in Ohio. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Great_Egret )

Flap Your Wings Like Bird!

F/6.3, 1/500, ISO 1000.

Golden-crowned Kinglet

Two fish are in a tank.

One turns to the other and says, “Hey, do you know how to drive this thing?”

Interesting Fact: Although it used to nest almost exclusively in boreal spruce-fir forests, the Golden-crowned Kinglet has been expanding its breeding range southward into conifer stands of the Midwest and Appalachians. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Golden-crowned_Kinglet/lifehistory )

Haters Will See You Walking On Water And Say It Is Because You Can’t Swim

F/11.0, 1/500, ISO 250.

Great Egret

Worker calls in to his Boss:

Worker: I can’t come to work today. I’m sick

Boss: Oh yea! What’s wrong with you now?

Worker: I have anal glaucoma.

Boss: What the hell is that?

Worker: I just can’t see my ass working today.

Interesting Fact: Great Egrets fly slowly but powerfully: with just two wingbeats per second their cruising speed is around 25 miles an hour. ( http://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/great_egret/lifehistory )

Together We Fly!

F/13.0, 1/640, ISO 400.

Mallard

As a scarecrow, people say I’m outstanding in my field.

But hay, it’s in my jeans.

Interesting Fact: Mallards, like other ducks, shed all their flight feathers at the end of the breeding season and are flightless for 3–4 weeks. They are secretive during this vulnerable time, and their body feathers molt into a concealing “eclipse” plumage that can make them hard to identify. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Mallard )

I Got Blue More Than You!

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 320.

Eastern Bluebird

In Court:

Judge: “Why did you steal the car?”

Defendant: “Your Honour I had to get to work.”

Judge: “Why didn’t you take the bus?”

Defendant: I don’t have a driver’s license for the bus.

Interesting Fact: Eastern Bluebirds occur across eastern North America and south as far as Nicaragua. Birds that live farther north and in the west of the range tend to lay more eggs than eastern and southern birds.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Eastern_Bluebird )