Look Out I’m A Biter!

Shark Week 2016

Bull Shark

F/5.6, 1/500, ISO 320.

Deadliest Shark In The World

Bull Shark ( Baby )

For five years, two sharks and a dolphin have worked side by side every day as window washers, and every night after work they stopped for a drink. One day, disaster struck, and the dolphin fell to his death. The police came to the site and began asking questions. “Where does he live?” The sharks shrugged their shoulders. “Is he married?” The sharks didn’t know. “What is his name?” The sharks shrugged again. “You worked with this guy for five years and you don’t know anything about him?” the cop asked. “I know something about him,” one shark volunteered. “He has two assholes.” “What are you talking about?” said the cop. “Well,” said the shark, “Whenever we go for a drink after work the bartended says, ‘Here comes the dolphin with the two assholes.'”

Interesting Fact:  Bull sharks are aggressive, common, and usually live near high-population areas like tropical shorelines. They are not bothered by brackish and freshwater, and even venture far inland via rivers and tributaries. ( http://animals.nationalgeographic.com/animals/fish/bull-shark/ )

 

You Goat It Dude!

Goats

F/6.0, 1/800, ISO 200.

Goats

How do you keep a goat from charging?

You take his credit card away!

Interesting Fact: Goats are very intelligent and curious animals. Their inquisitive nature is exemplified in their constant desire to explore and investigate anything unfamiliar which they come across. ( http://www.onekind.org/education/animals_a_z/goat )

Thank You For Bearing With Me

Black Bear

F/6.0, 1/40, ISO 500.

American Black Bear

How do you catch a fish without a fishing pole?

With your BEAR hands.

Interesting Fact: Black bears are not true hibernators. During their winter dormant period, though, they do not eat, drink, urinate, or defecate, but may wake up if disturbed. ( http://animals.nationalgeographic.com/animals/mammals/black-bear/ )

The Water Is Fine Come On In!

American Coot

F/5.6, 1/500, ISO 360.

American Coots

Father: Why did you get such a low score in that exam?

Son: Absence!

Father: You were absent on the day of the exam?

Son: No but the boy who sits next to me was!

Interesting Fact: Although it swims like a duck, the American Coot does not have webbed feet like a duck. Instead, each one of the coot’s long toes has broad lobes of skin that help it kick through the water. The broad lobes fold back each time the bird lifts its foot, so it doesn’t impede walking on dry land, though it supports the bird’s weight on mucky ground. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/American_Coot/lifehistory )

Look Into My Eyes, You Are Getting Sleepy!

Black-crowned Night-Heron 1

F/ 6.3, 1/640, ISO 200.

Black-Crowned Night-Heron ( Juvenile )

How do you wake up Lady gaga?

Poke her face.

Interesting Fact: The familiar evening sight and sound of the Black-crowned Night-Heron was captured in this description from Arthur Bent’s Life Histories of North American Marsh Birds: “How often, in the gathering dusk of evening, have we heard its loud, choking squawk and, looking up, have seen its stocky form, dimly outlined against the gray sky and propelled by steady wing beats, as it wings its way high in the air toward its evening feeding place in some distant pond or marsh!” ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Black-crowned_Night-Heron/lifehistory )

I See What You Did There!

White-Tailed Deer 2

F/8.0, 1/250, ISO 250.

White-Tailed Deer

Teacher: Who answers my next question, can go home.
One boy throws his bag out the window.
Teacher: Who just threw that?
Boy: Me and I’m going home now.

Interesting Fact: In the wild, white-tails, particularly the young, are preyed upon by bobcats, mountain lions, and coyotes. They use speed and agility to outrun predators, sprinting up to 30 miles (48 kilometers) per hour and leaping as high as 10 feet (3 meters) and as far as 30 feet (9 meters) in a single bound. ( http://animals.nationalgeographic.com/animals/mammals/white-tailed-deer/ )

Don’t Let Yesterday Take Up Too Much Of Today

Red-tailed Hawk 1

F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 250.

Red-tailed Hawk

What do u call a police officer that works in bed?

A undercover cop.

Interesting Fact: Courting Red-tailed Hawks put on a display in which they soar in wide circles at a great height. The male dives steeply, then shoots up again at an angle nearly as steep. After several of these swoops he approaches the female from above, extends his legs, and touches her briefly. Sometimes, the pair grab onto one other, clasp talons, and plummet in spirals toward the ground before pulling away. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Red-tailed_Hawk/lifehistory )

Have You Tried Deez Nuts!

Squirrel

F/6.3, 1/80, ISO 250.

Squirrel

Why do squirrels swim on their back?

To keep their nuts dry!

Interesting Fact: Squirrels tend to run in erratic paths. This is intended to deceive potential predators as to its chosen direction so that it may escape. ( http://www.onekind.org/education/animals_a_z/squirrel )

I Am Not Your Dinner!

Wild Turkey

F/6.3, 1/50, ISO 250.

Wild Turkey 

What happened to the turkey that got in a fight?

He got the stuffing knocked out of him!

Interesting Fact: In the early 1500s, European explorers brought home Wild Turkeys from Mexico, where native people had domesticated the birds centuries earlier. Turkeys quickly became popular on European menus thanks to their large size and rich taste from their diet of wild nuts. Later, when English colonists settled on the Atlantic Coast, they brought domesticated turkeys with them. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Wild_Turkey/lifehistory )