I’m So Fly!

F/11.0, 1/500, ISO 320.

Northern Harrier

A camel meets an elephant.

The elephant asks jokingly: “Why do you have two breasts on your back?”

The camel replies: “With a face like yours, I’d just shut up.”

Interesting Fact: Northern Harriers are the most owl-like of hawks (though they’re not related to owls). They rely on hearing as well as vision to capture prey. The disk-shaped face looks and functions much like an owl’s, with stiff facial feathers helping to direct sound to the ears. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Northern_Harrier ) 

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I Got Blue More Than You!

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 320.

Eastern Bluebird

In Court:

Judge: “Why did you steal the car?”

Defendant: “Your Honour I had to get to work.”

Judge: “Why didn’t you take the bus?”

Defendant: I don’t have a driver’s license for the bus.

Interesting Fact: Eastern Bluebirds occur across eastern North America and south as far as Nicaragua. Birds that live farther north and in the west of the range tend to lay more eggs than eastern and southern birds.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Eastern_Bluebird )

Hey You! Yeah You!

F/8.0, 1/250, ISO 320.

Carolina Wren

Three guys are stranded in a desert. They stubble upon a magic genie lamp.

The genie grants each of them one wish.

The first guy wishes to be back home. Wish granted.

The second guy wishes the same. Wish granted.

The third guy says, “It feels very lonely here now, I wish my friends were with me…” Wish granted.

Interesting Fact:Carolina Wrens usually go about their business alone or in pairs; after nestlings have fledged, you may see family groups feeding together. Feeding on or near the ground, the wrens run, hop, and flit around leaf litter and tangled vegetation; they dodge in and out of dark spaces created by downed trees, decaying logs, old stumps, and upturned roots. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Carolina_Wren/lifehistory ) 

He Went Thataway!

F/8.0, 1/250, ISO 320.

White-breasted Nuthatch

A wife complains to her husband: “Just look at that couple down the road, how lovely they are. He keeps holding her hand, kissing her, holding the door for her, why can’t you do the same?”

The husband: “Are you mad? I barely know the woman!”

Interesting Fact: White-breasted Nuthatches live in pairs year round and chase other nuthatches from their territory. Agitated birds fan their tails, flick their wings, or raise the feathers of the back. A bird backing down from a confrontation typically raises its bill and tail, and droops its wings. In winter White-breasted Nuthatches join groups of chickadees, titmice, and woodpeckers to forage.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/White-breasted_Nuthatch/lifehistory#behavior ) 

I Solemnly Swear I Am Up To No Good!

F/9.0, 1/125, ISO 320.

Black-crowned Night-Heron

Guest at a restaurant: “I refuse to eat this roast beef. Please call the manager! “

Waiter: “That’s no use. He won’t eat it either.”

Interesting Fact: Black-crowned Night Heron nest in groups that often include other species, including herons, egrets, and ibises. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Black-crowned_Night-Heron )

Who Dyd Your Hair!

F/8.0, 1/1000, ISO 400.

Red-Bellied Woodpecker

Teacher: “Bobby what do you want to be when you grow up?”

Bobby: “A doctor.”

Teacher: “And why’s that?”

Bobby: “Because it’s the only profession where you can tell women to take off their clothes and then stick their husbands with the bill.”

Interesting Fact:  These birds often stick to main branches and trunks of trees, where they hitch in classic woodpecker fashion, leaning away from the trunk and onto their stiff tail feathers as they search for food hiding in bark crevices. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Red-bellied_Woodpecker/lifehistory )

Dont Mess With Me, I Can Peck You Up!

F/9.0, 1/1250, ISO 400.

Downy Woodpecker

Teacher: Bob please point to America on the map.

Bob: This is it.

Teacher: Well done. Now class, who found America?

Class: Bob did.

Interesting Fact: Woodpeckers don’t sing songs, but they drum loudly against pieces of wood or metal to achieve the same effect. People sometimes think this drumming is part of the birds’ feeding habits, but it isn’t. In fact, feeding birds make surprisingly little noise even when they’re digging vigorously into wood. ( http://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/downy_woodpecker/lifehistory )

How low can you go?

northern-shoveler-2

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 250.

Northern Shoveler 

How do you know if there’s a snowman in your bed?

You wake up wet!

Interesting Fact: The bill of the Northern Shoveler is about 6.5 cm (2.5 inches) long. The bill has has about 110 fine projections (called lamellae) along the edges, for straining food from water. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Northern_Shoveler/lifehistory )

HELLO From The Other Side!

F/6.3, 1/640, ISO 200.

American Kestrel

What did the painter say to her boyfriend?

“I love you with all my art!”

Interesting Fact: It can be tough being one of the smallest birds of prey. Despite their fierce lifestyle, American Kestrels end up as prey for larger birds such as Northern Goshawks, Red-tailed Hawks, Barn Owls, American Crows, and Sharp-shinned and Cooper’s Hawks, as well as rat snakes, corn snakes, and even fire ants. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/American_Kestrel )

When you are with the right person, every day is Valentine’s Day!

Happy Valentines Day

F/5.6, 1/1600, ISO 400.

Mute Swan

What’s the best part about Valentines Day?

The day after when all the chocolate goes on sale.

Interesting Fact:  The Mute Swan is reported to mate for life. However, changing of mates does occur infrequently, and swans will remate if their partner dies. If a male loses his mate and pairs with a young female, she joins him on his territory. If he mates with an older female, they go to hers. If a female loses her mate, she remates quickly and usually chooses a younger male.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Mute_Swan/lifehistory )