I Don’t Have A Drinking Problem, I Drink, I Get Drunk, I Pass Out, No Problem!

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 320.

American Flamingo 

Why did the baseball player bring a rope to the game?

He wanted to tie the score

Interesting Fact: American flamingos are saltwater birds that ingest food with a high salt content and mostly drink salt water (with an osmolarity of usually 1000), hyperosmotic to the bodies cells . Also, though not commonly, they can drink fresh water at near-boiling temperatures from geysers. From their high-salt diet, they would lose more water and have a greater salt uptake. One way in which they osmoregulate is through the use of a salt gland, which is found in their beaks.[17] This salt gland helps excrete excess salt from the body through the nasal openings in the flamingo’s beaks. When these birds consume salt, the osmolarity increases in the blood plasma through the gut. This causes water to move out of the cells, increasing extracellular fluids. Both these changes, in turn, activate the salt glands of the bird,[18] but before any activity occurs in the salt glands, the kidney has to reabsorb the ingested sodium from the small intestine. As seen in other saltwater birds, the fluid that is excreted has been seen to have an osmolarity greater than that of the salt water, but this varies with salt consumption and body size. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/American_flamingo )

You Make Me Happy When Skies Are Grey

F/ 6.3, 1/125, ISO 500.

Yellow Warblers

How do birds fly?

They just wing it!

Interesting Fact: The nests of the Yellow Warbler are frequently parasitized by the Brown-headed Cowbird. The warbler often builds a new nest directly on top of the parasitized one, sometimes resulting in nests with up to six tiers. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Yellow_Warbler/lifehistory )

Do You Understand The Words That Are Coming Out Of My Mouth?!

F/6.3, 1/160, ISO 200.

Green Heron

What does a teddy bear say when you offer it a sandwich?

“No thanks, I’m stuffed”

Interesting Fact: Green Herons are common and widespread, but they can be hard to see at first. Whereas larger herons tend to stand prominently in open parts of wetlands, Green Herons tend to be at the edges, in shallow water, or concealed in vegetation. Visit a wetland and carefully scan the banks looking for a small, hunch-backed bird with a long, straight bill staring intently at the water. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Green_Heron )

Hey Autocorrect! Quit Tampering With My Curse Words, You Mother Forklift!

F/5.6, 1/100, ISO 640.

Bananaquit

Why did the fly fall off the toilet?

It got pissed off.

Interesting Fact: The bananaquit is known for its ability to adjust remarkably to human environments. It often visits gardens and may become very tame. Its nickname, the sugar bird, comes from its affinity for bowls or bird feeders stocked with granular sugar, a common method of attracting these birds.[19] The bananaquit builds a spherical lined nest with a side entrance hole, laying up to three eggs, which are incubated solely by the female.[4] It may also build its nest in human-made objects, such as lampshades and garden trellises. The birds breed all year regardless of season and build new nests throughout the year. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bananaquit )

 

 

A Wise Duck Once Told Me “QUACK” And He Meant It!

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 125.

White-cheeked pintail

Why did the student wear eye-glasses in math class?

It improved DiVision!

Interesting Fact: White-cheeked Pintail: Large, heavily spotted dark and light brown duck with striking white cheek patches, blue bill with bright red base, buff pointed tail. Legs and feet are blue-gray. Feeds on aquatic plants, small invertebrates. Swift direct flight with strong rapid wing beats. AKA Bahama Duck. ( https://identify.whatbird.com/obj/1029/overview/White-cheeked_Pintail.aspx )

Sing… The World Needs Your Music In It.

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 320.

Eastern Wood-Pewee

Why can’t you write with a broken pencil?

Because it’s pointless.

Interesting Fact: The Eastern Wood-Pewee’s lichen-covered nest is so inconspicuous that it often looks like a knot on a branch. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Eastern_Wood-Pewee )

 

 

Sleeping Beauty.

F/6.3, 1/160, ISO 200.

Common Snapping Turtle

What do you get when you mix an elephant with a rhino?

Elephino!!!

Joke complementary of: robinwrites

F/5.6, 1/125, ISO 200.

F/5.6, 1/500, ISO 400.

Interesting Fact: Snapping turtles ambush their prey from the bottom of the water. Fish mistake their tongue for warms and viola dinner is served. yum

Sorry… We Are Busy Sunbathing.

F/8.0, 1/250, ISO 320.

Red-Eared Slider Turtle

What did the Sewage Worker say to his apprentice?

Urine for a surprise.

Interesting Fact: Red-eared sliders do not hibernate, but actually brumate; while they become less active, they do occasionally rise to the surface for food or air. Brumation can occur to varying degrees. In the wild, red-eared sliders brumate over the winter at the bottoms of ponds or shallow lakes. They generally become inactive in October, when temperatures fall below 10 °C (50 °F).[9] During this time, the turtles enter a state of sopor, during which they do not eat or defecate, they remain nearly motionless, and the frequency of their breathing falls. Individuals usually brumate underwater, but they have also been found under banks and rocks, and in hollow stumps. In warmer winter climates, they can become active and come to the surface for basking. When the temperature begins to drop again, however, they quickly return to a brumation state. Sliders generally come up for food in early March to as late as the end of April. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red-eared_slider )

Everyday May Not Be Good, But There Is Something Good In Everyday.

F/9.0, 1/250, ISO 320.

Muskrat

Why did the dog sit in the shade?

Because he didn’t want to be a hot dog!

Interesting Fact: Native Americans have long considered the muskrat to be a very important animal. Some predict winter snowfall levels by observing the size and timing of muskrat lodge construction.[26]  In several Native American creation myths, the muskrat dives to the bottom of the primordial sea to bring up the mud from which the earth is created, after other animals have failed in the task. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Muskrat#Behavior )

 

I See Sky Of Blue!

F/11.0, 1/500, ISO 320.

Eastern Bluebird 

Imagine you are in a water tank with a roof. There are no objects in the tank to help you escape. How do you get out?

Stop imagining.

Interesting Fact: Males vying over territories chase each other at high speed, sometimes grappling with their feet, pulling at feathers with their beaks, and hitting with their wings. The boxes and tree cavities where bluebirds nest are a hot commodity among birds that require holes for nesting, and male bluebirds will attack other species they deem a threat, including House Sparrows, European Starlings, Tree Swallows, Great Crested Flycatchers, Carolina Chickadees, and Brown-headed Nuthatches, as well as non-cavity nesters such as robins, Blue Jays, mockingbirds, and cowbirds. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Eastern_Bluebird/lifehistory )