Hey You! Yeah You!

F/8.0, 1/250, ISO 320.

Carolina Wren

Three guys are stranded in a desert. They stubble upon a magic genie lamp.

The genie grants each of them one wish.

The first guy wishes to be back home. Wish granted.

The second guy wishes the same. Wish granted.

The third guy says, “It feels very lonely here now, I wish my friends were with me…” Wish granted.

Interesting Fact:Carolina Wrens usually go about their business alone or in pairs; after nestlings have fledged, you may see family groups feeding together. Feeding on or near the ground, the wrens run, hop, and flit around leaf litter and tangled vegetation; they dodge in and out of dark spaces created by downed trees, decaying logs, old stumps, and upturned roots. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Carolina_Wren/lifehistory ) 

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He Went Thataway!

F/8.0, 1/250, ISO 320.

White-breasted Nuthatch

A wife complains to her husband: “Just look at that couple down the road, how lovely they are. He keeps holding her hand, kissing her, holding the door for her, why can’t you do the same?”

The husband: “Are you mad? I barely know the woman!”

Interesting Fact: White-breasted Nuthatches live in pairs year round and chase other nuthatches from their territory. Agitated birds fan their tails, flick their wings, or raise the feathers of the back. A bird backing down from a confrontation typically raises its bill and tail, and droops its wings. In winter White-breasted Nuthatches join groups of chickadees, titmice, and woodpeckers to forage.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/White-breasted_Nuthatch/lifehistory#behavior ) 

Who Dyd Your Hair!

F/8.0, 1/1000, ISO 400.

Red-Bellied Woodpecker

Teacher: “Bobby what do you want to be when you grow up?”

Bobby: “A doctor.”

Teacher: “And why’s that?”

Bobby: “Because it’s the only profession where you can tell women to take off their clothes and then stick their husbands with the bill.”

Interesting Fact:  These birds often stick to main branches and trunks of trees, where they hitch in classic woodpecker fashion, leaning away from the trunk and onto their stiff tail feathers as they search for food hiding in bark crevices. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Red-bellied_Woodpecker/lifehistory )

Dont Mess With Me, I Can Peck You Up!

F/9.0, 1/1250, ISO 400.

Downy Woodpecker

Teacher: Bob please point to America on the map.

Bob: This is it.

Teacher: Well done. Now class, who found America?

Class: Bob did.

Interesting Fact: Woodpeckers don’t sing songs, but they drum loudly against pieces of wood or metal to achieve the same effect. People sometimes think this drumming is part of the birds’ feeding habits, but it isn’t. In fact, feeding birds make surprisingly little noise even when they’re digging vigorously into wood. ( http://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/downy_woodpecker/lifehistory )

Keep Looking Up Thats The Secret Of Life!

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Red-Bellied Woodpecker

Dentist: This will hurt a little.

Patient: OK.

Dentist: I’ve been having an affair with your wife for a while now.

Interesting Fact:  These birds often stick to main branches and trunks of trees, where they hitch in classic woodpecker fashion, leaning away from the trunk and onto their stiff tail feathers as they search for food hiding in bark crevices. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Red-bellied_Woodpecker/lifehistory )

Don’t Confuse Me With Twitter!

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 400.

Blue Jay

What do you get when you cross and smurf and a cow?

Blue cheese!

Interesting Fact: The black bridle across the face, nape, and throat varies extensively and may help Blue Jays recognize one another. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Blue_Jay/lifehistory ) 

Sorry. Yesterday Was The Deadline For All Complaints.

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 500.

Northern Cardinal ( Female )

What do you give an elephant that’s going to be sick?

Plenty of space!

Interesting Fact: Males sometimes bring nest material to the female, who does most of the building. She crushes twigs with her beak until they’re pliable, then turns in the nest to bend the twigs around her body and push them into a cup shape with her feet. The cup has four layers: coarse twigs (and sometimes bits of trash) covered in a leafy mat, then lined with grapevine bark and finally grasses, stems, rootlets, and pine needles. The nest typically takes 3 to 9 days to build; the finished product is 2-3 inches tall, 4 inches across, with an inner diameter of about 3 inches. Cardinals usually don’t use their nests more than once. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Northern_Cardinal/lifehistory )

Don’t Look Back With Regret, Look Foward With Hope.

F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 160.

Black-capped Chickadee

What do you call a gorilla wearing ear-muffs?

Anything you like! He can’t hear you!

Interesting Fact: There is a dominance hierarchy within flocks. Some birds are “winter floaters” that don’t belong to a single flock—these individuals may have a different rank within each flock they spend time in. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Black-capped_Chickadee/lifehistory ) 

A Bird Does Not Sing Becauces It Has An Answer. It Sings Because It Has A Song.

F/6.3, 1/100, ISO 320.

Tufted Titmouse

What is the snowman’s breakfast?…

Frosted flakes!

Interesting Fact: The Black-crested Titmouse of Texas and Mexico has at times been considered just a form of the Tufted Titmouse. The two species hybridize where they meet, but the hybrid zone is narrow and stable over time. They differ slightly in the quality of their calls, and show genetic differences as well. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Tufted_Titmouse/lifehistory )

Bluetiful!

F/8.0, 1/250, ISO 400.

Blue Jay

Where do cows go for entertainment?

The mooooo-vies!

Interesting Fact:  The Blue Jay frequently mimics the calls of hawks, especially the Red-shouldered Hawk. These calls may provide information to other jays that a hawk is around, or may be used to deceive other species into believing a hawk is present. (  https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Blue_Jay/lifehistory )