Easter Is The Only Time Of The Year When It’s Perfectly Safe To Put All Your Eggs In One Basket.

Happy Easter Everyone! 

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Desert Cottontail Rabbit

What did the Easter Egg say to the boiling water?

It’s going to take awhile to get me hard I just got layed by some chick!

Interesting Fact:  Many desert animals prey on cottontails, including birds of prey, mustelids, the coyote, the bobcat, the lynx, wolves, mountain lions, snakes, weasels, humans, and even squirrels, should a cottontail be injured or docile from illness.[22] Alien species, such as cats and dogs, are also known predators, and also pose a threat.[12] Southwestern Native Americans hunted them for meat but also used their fur and hides. It is also considered a game species, due to which it is hunted for sport.[12] The desert cottontail’s normal behavior upon spotting a potential predator is to freeze in place in an attempt to avoid being detected. If it determines that it is in danger, it will flee the area by hopping away in a zigzag pattern.[23] Cottontails can reach speeds of over 30 km/h (19 mph). When defending itself against small predators or other desert cottontails, it will nudge with its nose, or slap with its front paws, usually preceded by a hop straight upwards as high as two feet when threatened or taken by surprise. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Desert_cottontail )


Let Me Tell You A Secret.

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White-Tailed Deer

Who did Bambi invite to his birthday party?

His nearest and deer-est friends.

Interesting Fact: Although most often thought of as forest animals depending on relatively small openings and edges, white-tailed deer can equally adapt themselves to life in more open prairie, savanna woodlands, and sage communities as in the Southwestern United States and northern Mexico. These savanna-adapted deer have relatively large antlers in proportion to their body size and large tails. Also, a noticeable difference exists in size between male and female deer of the savannas. The Texas white-tailed deer (O. v. texanus), of the prairies and oak savannas of Texas and parts of Mexico, are the largest savanna-adapted deer in the Southwest, with impressive antlers that might rival deer found in Canada and the northern United States. Populations of Arizona (O. v. couesi) and Carmen Mountains (O. v. carminis) white-tailed deer inhabit montane mixed oak and pine woodland communities.[21] The Arizona and Carmen Mountains deer are smaller, but may also have impressive antlers, considering their size. The white-tailed deer of the Llanos region of Colombia and Venezuela (O. v. apurensis and O. v. gymnotis) have antler dimensions similar to the Arizona white-tailed deer.  ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/White-tailed_deer )

Deer Me To Jump?!

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White-Tailed Deer

What is the cheapest kind of meat?

Deer Balls, two for under a Buck!

Interesting Fact: White-tailed deer are generalists and can adapt to a wide variety of habitats.[20] The largest deer occur in the temperate regions of Canada and United States. The northern white-tailed deer (O. v. borealis), Dakota white-tailed deer (O. v. dacotensis), and northwest white-tailed deer (O. v. ochrourus) are some of the largest animals, with large antlers. The smallest deer occur in the Florida Keys and in partially wooded lowlands in the neotropics. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/White-tailed_deer )




What Drives You Nuts?!

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American Red Squirrel

Why do squirrels swim on there back?

To keep their nuts dry!

Interesting Fact: Red squirrels can be easily distinguished from other North American tree squirrels by their smaller size, 28–35 cm (11–14 in) total length (including tail), territorial behavior, and reddish fur with a white venter (underbelly).[6] Red squirrels are somewhat larger than chipmunks. The Douglas squirrel is morphologically similar to the American red squirrels, but has a rust-colored venter and is restricted to the southwestern coast of British Columbia and in the Pacific Northwest of the United States. These species’ ranges do not overlap.  ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/American_red_squirrel )

Oh My Deer…

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White-Tailed Deer

What is it called when a tree takes time off from work in autumn?

Paid leaf.

Interesting Fact: Deer have a great sense of hearing and can even move their ears in any direction, without moving the head. Deer have an excellent sense of smell and can detect predators from a long distance away.

Keep Calm And Hop On!

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Desert Cottontail Rabbit

What do rabbits say before they eat?

Lettuce pray.

Interesting Fact: Due to the variable temperature of living conditions, desert cottontails must be adequate thermoregulators to minimize water loss during the hotter seasons and require shaded areas of their environment to conduct evaporative water loss through thermal heat transfer. In open-desert areas, they can withstand for a short period with extremely high temperatures of around 45 °C and have a large evaporative water loss capacity of around 1.5% body mass/hour, though cottontails can withstand longer in an ideal environment with shaded areas. To cope with evaporative heat loss, they do panting and undergo changes in production of their basal metabolic rate in relation to the ambient temperature of the environment. Ears of desert cottontails make up 14% of their body size and may help with thermoregulation. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Desert_cottontail )

Buck Off!

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White-Tailed Deer

I give a dead battery away today…

Free of charge!

Interesting Fact: Males regrow their antlers every year. About one in 10,000 females also has antlers, although this is usually associated with freemartinism.https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/White-tailed_deer

Never Wrestle With A Pig. You Both Get Dirty And The Pig Loves It….

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Duroc pig

What do you call a pig with no legs?

A groundhog.

Interesting Fact: The Duroc pig is an older breed of domestic pig. The breed was developed in the United States and formed the basis for many mixed-breed commercial hogs.  ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Duroc_pig )

I Am Not Liable If You Falling Asleep Count Sheep!

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What do you call a sheep that is always quiet?

A shhhheep!

Interesting Fact: The exact line of descent between domestic sheep and their wild ancestors is unclear.[1] The most common hypothesis states that Ovis aries is descended from the Asiatic (O. orientalis) species of mouflon.[2]:5 Sheep were among the first animals to be domesticated by humankind (although the domestication of dogs may be over 20,000 years earlier); the domestication date is estimated to fall between 11,000 and 9,000 B.C in Mesopotamia.[2]:4[3]:11–14[4]:2[5] The rearing of sheep for secondary products, and the resulting breed development, began in either southwest Asia or western Europe.[6] Initially, sheep were kept solely for meat, milk and skins. Archaeological evidence from statuary found at sites in Iran suggests that selection for woolly sheep may have begun around 6000 BC,[2]:5[3]:11 and the earliest woven wool garments have been dated to two to three thousand years later. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sheep#History )

Im On Top Of The World!

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Why was the chipmunk late for work?

Traffic was NUTS.

Interesting Fact: Their shrill, repeated, birdlike chirp is usually made upon sensing a threat but is also thought to be used as a mating call by females. Chipmunks are solitary creatures and normally ignore one another except during the spring, when mating takes place. After a 30-day gestation, a litter of two to eight is born. The young stay with their parents for two months before they begin to gather their own provisions for the winter ahead. ( https://www.nationalgeographic.com/animals/mammals/group/chipmunks/ )