Well I’m going down, down, down, down, down, down.

mallard-landing

F/6.0, 1/500, ISO 360.

Mallard  

A Ham sandwich walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink.

The bartender says, “Sorry we don’t serve food.”

Interesting Fact:  The Mallard is the ancestor of nearly all domestic duck breeds (everything except the Muscovy Duck). Domestic ducks can be common in city ponds and can be confusing to identify—they may lack the white neck ring, show white on the chest, be all dark, or show oddly shaped crests on the head. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Mallard/lifehistory )

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I Have A Leg Up On You

F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 250.

Greater Yellowlegs

Ghosts are hard to impress.

They boo everything.

Interesting Fact: Their breeding habitat is bogs and marshes in the boreal forest region of Canada and Alaska. They nest on the ground, usually in well-hidden locations near water. The three to four eggs average 50 mm (2.0 in) in length and 33 mm (1.3 in) in breadth and weigh about 28 g (0.99 oz). The incubation period is 23 days. The young leave the nest within 24 hours of hatching and then leave the vicinity of the nest within two days.( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Greater_yellowlegs )

Life Begins At Night

F/22.0, 6.0, ISO 250.

New York State Capitol

What do you call a man with no nose and no body?

Nobody nose.

Interesting Fact: Legislative sessions had been held at different buildings in different places before Albany was declared the State capital in 1797. From that time until 1811, the State Legislature met at the Old Albany City Hall. The first State Capitol was designed by Albany native Philip Hooker, started in 1804, inaugurated in 1812 and remained in use until 1879 when the current building was inaugurated.  ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/New_York_State_Capitol )

Life Always Offers You A Second Chance. It’s Called Tomorrow.

F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 250.

Greater Yellowlegs

Beer Bottle: You break me, you get 1 year of bad luck!

Mirror: You kiddin’ me? You break me, then you will get 7 years of bad luck! 

Condom: Hahaha… (Condom walks off laughing)

Interesting Fact: These birds forage in shallow water, sometimes using their bills to stir up the water. They mainly eat insects and small fish, as well as crustaceans and marine worms. It often walks in sand or mud and leaves clear tracks; it can be possible to gather information about this species using its tracks. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Greater_yellowlegs )

Fly By!

F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 200.

Great Egret

Bobby went in to a pet shop.

Bobby: “Can I buy a goldfish?”

The Sales Guy: “Do you want an aquarium?”

Bobby: “I don’t care what star sign it is.”

Interesting Fact: The oldest known Great Egret was 22 years, 10 months old and was banded in Ohio. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Great_Egret )

Haters Will See You Walking On Water And Say It Is Because You Can’t Swim

F/11.0, 1/500, ISO 250.

Great Egret

Worker calls in to his Boss:

Worker: I can’t come to work today. I’m sick

Boss: Oh yea! What’s wrong with you now?

Worker: I have anal glaucoma.

Boss: What the hell is that?

Worker: I just can’t see my ass working today.

Interesting Fact: Great Egrets fly slowly but powerfully: with just two wingbeats per second their cruising speed is around 25 miles an hour. ( http://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/great_egret/lifehistory )

Together We Fly!

F/13.0, 1/640, ISO 400.

Mallard

As a scarecrow, people say I’m outstanding in my field.

But hay, it’s in my jeans.

Interesting Fact: Mallards, like other ducks, shed all their flight feathers at the end of the breeding season and are flightless for 3–4 weeks. They are secretive during this vulnerable time, and their body feathers molt into a concealing “eclipse” plumage that can make them hard to identify. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Mallard )

When you are with the right person, every day is Valentine’s Day!

Happy Valentines Day

F/5.6, 1/1600, ISO 400.

Mute Swan

What’s the best part about Valentines Day?

The day after when all the chocolate goes on sale.

Interesting Fact:  The Mute Swan is reported to mate for life. However, changing of mates does occur infrequently, and swans will remate if their partner dies. If a male loses his mate and pairs with a young female, she joins him on his territory. If he mates with an older female, they go to hers. If a female loses her mate, she remates quickly and usually chooses a younger male.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Mute_Swan/lifehistory )

Got An Itch That I Can’t Reach!

F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 320.

Mallard

What do you call a duck that steals?

A robber ducky.

Interesting Fact: Mallards nest on the ground on dry land that is close to water; nests are generally concealed under overhanging grass or other vegetation. Occasionally, Mallards nest in agricultural fields, especially alfalfa but also winter wheat, barley, flax, and oats. Both urban and wild populations readily nest in artificial nesting structures. Pairs search for nest sites together, typically on evening flights circling low over the habitat. Occasionally nests are placed on floating mats of vegetation or woven into plant stems that rise out of the water. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Mallard/lifehistory )

Snow Way You’ve Got To Be Flaking Me!

F/5.6, 1/1600, ISO 400.

Mute Swan

Why was the snowman sad?

Cause he had a meltdown.

Interesting Fact: Male Mute Swans select the nest site and may start several nests before the female accepts the location. Nest sites are safe from flooding yet offer easy access to water, with ample nesting materials and food nearby–often on a small peninsula, along a heavily vegetated shoreline, or on a small to medium-sized island.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Mute_Swan/lifehistory )