I Don’t Have A Drinking Problem, I Drink, I Get Drunk, I Pass Out, No Problem!

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 320.

American Flamingo 

Why did the baseball player bring a rope to the game?

He wanted to tie the score

Interesting Fact: American flamingos are saltwater birds that ingest food with a high salt content and mostly drink salt water (with an osmolarity of usually 1000), hyperosmotic to the bodies cells . Also, though not commonly, they can drink fresh water at near-boiling temperatures from geysers. From their high-salt diet, they would lose more water and have a greater salt uptake. One way in which they osmoregulate is through the use of a salt gland, which is found in their beaks.[17] This salt gland helps excrete excess salt from the body through the nasal openings in the flamingo’s beaks. When these birds consume salt, the osmolarity increases in the blood plasma through the gut. This causes water to move out of the cells, increasing extracellular fluids. Both these changes, in turn, activate the salt glands of the bird,[18] but before any activity occurs in the salt glands, the kidney has to reabsorb the ingested sodium from the small intestine. As seen in other saltwater birds, the fluid that is excreted has been seen to have an osmolarity greater than that of the salt water, but this varies with salt consumption and body size. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/American_flamingo )

Hey Autocorrect! Quit Tampering With My Curse Words, You Mother Forklift!

F/5.6, 1/100, ISO 640.

Bananaquit

Why did the fly fall off the toilet?

It got pissed off.

Interesting Fact: The bananaquit is known for its ability to adjust remarkably to human environments. It often visits gardens and may become very tame. Its nickname, the sugar bird, comes from its affinity for bowls or bird feeders stocked with granular sugar, a common method of attracting these birds.[19] The bananaquit builds a spherical lined nest with a side entrance hole, laying up to three eggs, which are incubated solely by the female.[4] It may also build its nest in human-made objects, such as lampshades and garden trellises. The birds breed all year regardless of season and build new nests throughout the year. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bananaquit )

 

 

A Wise Duck Once Told Me “QUACK” And He Meant It!

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 125.

White-cheeked pintail

Why did the student wear eye-glasses in math class?

It improved DiVision!

Interesting Fact: White-cheeked Pintail: Large, heavily spotted dark and light brown duck with striking white cheek patches, blue bill with bright red base, buff pointed tail. Legs and feet are blue-gray. Feeds on aquatic plants, small invertebrates. Swift direct flight with strong rapid wing beats. AKA Bahama Duck. ( https://identify.whatbird.com/obj/1029/overview/White-cheeked_Pintail.aspx )

But Officer, I’ve Never Been Able To Walk A Straight Line.

F/5.6, 1/280, ISO 500.

Atlantic Ghost Crab

Why is there only one Yogi Bear?

Because when they tried to make another one, they made a Boo-Boo.

Interesting Fact: Crabs of this species usually engage in a combat that is non-contact. The combat style is more ritualistic in style and ends in contact in very rare cases. ( https://www.animalspot.net/ghost-crab-sand-crab.html )

 

 

Kick Your Feet Back Its The Weekend!

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 200.

Hispaniolan slider

Why do you measure snakes in inches?

Because they don’t have any feet.

Interesting Fact: Whether this creature is found in the wild or in captivity, it has been known to urinate when picked up. This is considered a sign of distress. It also may bite or scratch, but has not been known to cause any severe harm. If found in the wild, the turtle may be more likely to do any one of these. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hispaniolan_slider )

 

 

 

Quack, Damn You!

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 160.

White-Cheeked Pintail 

Did you hear the one about the airplane?

Oh, never mind, it’s probably over your head.

Joke provided by:  Russell Smith ecstaticeclectica.com

Interesting Fact: The White-cheeked Pintail was first described in 1758 by Carolus Linnaeus, Swedish botanist, physician and zoologist. ( http://identify.whatbird.com/obj/1029/overview/White-cheeked_Pintail.aspx )

 

 

I Think I’m In Love. No Wait, I Was Just Hungry.

F/11.0,1/500, ISO 800.

Bananaquit

What do you call a laughing motorcycle?

“Yamahahaha”

Interesting Fact: The bananaquit has a slender, curved bill, adapted to taking nectar from flowers. It sometimes pierces flowers from the side, taking the nectar without pollinating the plant.[18] It also feeds on sweet juices by puncturing fruit with its beak, and will eat small insects on occasion. While feeding, the bananaquit must always perch as it cannot hover like a hummingbird. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bananaquit )

Do What Makes You Happy!

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 1250.

Hispaniolan Amazon Parrots

Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don’t work!

Interesting Fact: The sharply declining population of Hispaniolan amazons are found in a small area of Haiti, Dominican Republic and a few offshore islands. It has been introduced to Puerto Rico.  ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hispaniolan_amazon )

NO Double Dipping!

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 200.

American Flamingos

What’s the difference between a piano, tuna fish, and a tub of glue?

You can tune a piano but you can’t piano a tuna.

What about the tub of glue?

I knew you’d get stuck on that.

Interesting Fact: Like other flamingo species, American flamingos will migrate short distances to ensure that they get enough food or because their current habitat has been disturbed in some way. One habitat disturbance that has been observed to cause flamingos to leave their feeding grounds is elevated water levels.  ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/American_flamingo )

 

When I Dip You Dip We Dip!

F/11.0, 1/500, ISO 800.

White-Cheeked Pintail 

Why did the coffee taste like mud?

It was fresh ground

Interesting Fact: White-cheeked Pintail: This species is a native of the Caribbean Islands, South America, and the Galapagos Islands. Within the United States, it is a rare to casual visitor in southern Florida. This bird is found near rivers, lakes, and ponds, as well as along costal marshes and rocky or sandy seashores. The White-cheeked Pintail was first described in 1758 by Carolus Linnaeus, Swedish botanist, physician and zoologist. ( http://identify.whatbird.com/obj/1029/overview/White-cheeked_Pintail.aspx )