If You Can’t Tone It Tan It

F/11.0, 1/500, ISO 250.

Hispaniolan slider

Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station!

Interesting Fact:  The Hispaniolan slider is a freshwater turtle. They can live on land and water, but prefer to be near freshwater.[3] These sliders are not on the endangered list, but are considered vulnerable. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hispaniolan_slider )

Turtle Power!

F/6.3, 1/125, ISO 200.

Red-Eared Slider Turtle 

What did one elevator say to the other?

I think I’m coming down with something!

Interesting Fact: Red-eared sliders are almost entirely aquatic, but as they are cold-blooded, they leave the water to sunbathe to regulate their temperature.  ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red-eared_slider )

Only The Bold Get To The Top.

F/8.0, 1/250, ISO 320.

Red-Eared Slider Turtles

Why did the nurse go to art school?

To learn how to draw blood!

Interesting Fact: Red-eared sliders are almost entirely aquatic, but as they are cold-blooded, they leave the water to sunbathe to regulate their temperature. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red-eared_slider )

 

 

 

Sleeping Beauty.

F/6.3, 1/160, ISO 200.

Common Snapping Turtle

What do you get when you mix an elephant with a rhino?

Elephino!!!

Joke complementary of: robinwrites

F/5.6, 1/125, ISO 200.

F/5.6, 1/500, ISO 400.

Interesting Fact: Snapping turtles ambush their prey from the bottom of the water. Fish mistake their tongue for warms and viola dinner is served. yum

Sorry… We Are Busy Sunbathing.

F/8.0, 1/250, ISO 320.

Red-Eared Slider Turtle

What did the Sewage Worker say to his apprentice?

Urine for a surprise.

Interesting Fact: Red-eared sliders do not hibernate, but actually brumate; while they become less active, they do occasionally rise to the surface for food or air. Brumation can occur to varying degrees. In the wild, red-eared sliders brumate over the winter at the bottoms of ponds or shallow lakes. They generally become inactive in October, when temperatures fall below 10 °C (50 °F).[9] During this time, the turtles enter a state of sopor, during which they do not eat or defecate, they remain nearly motionless, and the frequency of their breathing falls. Individuals usually brumate underwater, but they have also been found under banks and rocks, and in hollow stumps. In warmer winter climates, they can become active and come to the surface for basking. When the temperature begins to drop again, however, they quickly return to a brumation state. Sliders generally come up for food in early March to as late as the end of April. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red-eared_slider )

Kick Your Feet Back Its The Weekend!

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 200.

Hispaniolan slider

Why do you measure snakes in inches?

Because they don’t have any feet.

Interesting Fact: Whether this creature is found in the wild or in captivity, it has been known to urinate when picked up. This is considered a sign of distress. It also may bite or scratch, but has not been known to cause any severe harm. If found in the wild, the turtle may be more likely to do any one of these. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hispaniolan_slider )

 

 

 

Money Comes Like A Turtle And Goes Like A Rabbit.

F/11.0, 1/500, ISO 250.

Red-Eared Slider Turtle 

What do you get if cross a Turtle with a Giraffe?

A Turtle-Neck

Interesting Fact: Courtship and mating activities for red-eared sliders usually occur between March and July, and take place under water. During courtship, the male swims around the female and flutters or vibrates the back side of his long claws on and around her face and head, possibly to direct pheromones towards her.[29] The female swims toward the male and, if she is receptive, sinks to the bottom for mating. If the female is not receptive, she may become aggressive towards the male. Courtship can last 45 minutes, but mating takes only 10 minutes. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red-eared_slider )

Life Is Good Take It Slow

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 200.

Hispaniolan slider

What do sheep do on nice summer days?

Go to a baa-baa-cue.

Interesting Fact: Unlike red-eared sliders, they do not have red patches on their heads. They have distinct light and dark stripes on their necks, feet, and tails. The tops of their shells are brown and the bottoms are yellow. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hispaniolan_slider )

You Are A Lizard Not A Wizard!

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 125.

Anolis Cristatellus ( Crested Anole ) 

What do you call a lizard that sings for a Rap Records?

A Rap-tile!

Interesting Fact: When looking for a mate or defending its territory, this anole will display its dewlap and perform “push-ups” to establish dominance. Males aggressively defend territories when mating, but only rarely does this result in physical combat. As a defense against predators, they autotomize their tails. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anolis_cristatellus )