I Have A Funny Feeling It’s Going To Be One Of Those Days!

F/5.6, 1/125, ISO 250.

Black Vulture

A farmer goes out and buys a new, young rooster. As soon as he brings him home, the
young rooster rushes and screws all 150 of the farmers hens. The farmer is impressed.
At lunchtime, the young rooster again screws all 150 hens. The farmer is not just impressed anymore,he is worried. Next morning,not only is the rooster screwin…g the hens but he is screwing the turkeys,ducks even the cow.
Later farmer looks out into the barnyard and finds the rooster stretched out, limp as a rag, his eyes closed, dead and vultures circling overhead.
The farmer runs out, looks down at the young roosters limp body and says: “You deserved it, you horny bastard!”
And the young rooster opens one eye, points up at the vultures with his wing, and says, Shhhh!,they are about to land.”

Interesting Fact: One-on-one at a carcass, Black Vultures lose out to the slightly larger Turkey Vulture. But flocks of Black Vultures can quickly take over a carcass and drive the more solitary Turkey Vultures away. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Black_Vulture/lifehistory )

Just Out And About!

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 400.

Pied-Billed Grebe

How is being at a singles bar different from going to the circus?

At the circus the clowns don’t talk.

Interesting Fact: When in danger, Pied-billed Grebes sometimes make a dramatic “crash-dive” to get away. A crash-diving grebe pushes its body down with its wings thrust outward. Its tail and head disappears last, while the bird kicks water several feet into the air. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Pied-billed_Grebe/ )

I Fear Sharks So Much That I Just Sharted!

F/6.3, 1/640, ISO 7200.

Pied-Billed Grebe

Why do sharks make terrible lawyers?

They’re too nice!

Interesting Fact: Pied-billed Grebe chicks typically leave the nest the first day after hatching and spend much of their first week riding around on a parent’s back. They usually spend most of their first 3 weeks on or near the nest platform. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Pied-Billed_Grebe )

Don’t Be A Creep!

F/8.0, 1/250, ISO 320.

Brown Creeper

Past, present and future walk into a bar.

It was tense!

Interesting Fact: The Brown Creeper spends most of its time spiraling up tree trunks in search of insects. It holds its short legs on either side of its body, with the long, curved claws hooking into the bark, and braces itself with its long, stiff tail. Both feet hop at the same time, making the bird’s head duck after each hop. Because of its specialized anatomy, the Brown Creeper rarely climbs downward: once high in a tree, it flies down to begin a new ascent at the base of a nearby tree. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Brown_Creeper/lifehistory )

But I’m A Creep!

F/8.0, 1/250, ISO 320.

Brown Creeper

Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.

Interesting Fact: Brown Creepers burn an estimated 4–10 calories (technically, kilocalories) per day, a tiny fraction of a human’s daily intake of about 2,000 kilocalories. By eating a single spider, a creeper gains enough energy to climb nearly 200 feet vertically. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Brown_Creeper )

I Forgot My Swimsuit!

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 400.

Pied-Billed Grebe

Breaking news!

Energizer Bunny arrested – charged with battery!

Interesting Fact: Pied-billed Grebes are fairly poor fliers and typically stay on the water—although rare individuals have managed to fly as far as the Hawaiian Islands, Europe, the Azores, and the Canary Islands. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Pied-billed_Grebe/ )

Sometimes Sitting Still Is The Best Move You Can Make.

F/6.3, 1/160, ISO 160.

Prairie Falcon

What do you get when you put a candle in a suit of armor?

A knight light.

Interesting Fact: Prairie Falcons are among the species of birds that seem to play—they’ve been seen dropping dried cow manure in midair and then diving to catch it. Like young ball players flipping a baseball to themselves, this may be a way to sharpen their coordination skills. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Prairie_Falcon/overview )

If Money Is Made Out Of Paper, Doesn’t That mean money Grows on Trees?

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 320.

Brown Creeper

What do you do when two snails have a fight?

Leave them to slug it out!

Interesting Fact: Sometimes creepers build nests in unusual places, such as behind window shutters, in or under roofs, inside fenceposts, or inside concrete blocks. One brought up a family in a specially constructed box made of pieces of Douglas-fir bark. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Brown_Creeper/lifehistory )

Have You Hugged A Tree Today?

F/8.0, 1/250, ISO 320.

Brown Creeper

How do you make a tissue dance?

Put a little boogie in it.

Interesting Fact: The Brown Creeper builds a hammock-like nest behind a loosened flap of bark on a dead or dying tree. It wasn’t until 1879 that naturalists discovered this unique nesting strategy. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Brown_Creeper/lifehistory )