Because I’m Bad, I’m Bad, Really, Really Bad

Common Grackle 1

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 320.

Common Grackle  

A guy walks into an antique store and buys a grandfather clock, he walks out of the shop with it and accidentally walks into a drunk guy. (they both fall over and the clock gets smashed to bits)
The guy says to the drunk, “Why don’t you watch where your going?” and the drunk says, “Why don’t you carry a wrist watch like everybody else?”

Interesting Fact: You might see a Common Grackle hunched over on the ground, wings spread, letting ants crawl over its body and feathers. This is called anting, and grackles are frequent practitioners among the many bird species that do it. The ants secrete formic acid, the chemical in their stings, and this may rid the bird of parasites. In addition to ants, grackles have been seen using walnut juice, lemons and limes, marigold blossoms, chokecherries, and mothballs in a similar fashion. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Common_Grackle/lifehistory )

Bee Mine!

bee

F/ 8.0, 1/200, ISO 100.

Bumblebee

Why did the bee get married?

Because he found his honey

Interesting Fact: Queen hibernates during the winter and starts laying eggs in the spring. She lays 8 to 12 eggs at a time. Young bumblebees emerge after 21 days.  ( http://www.softschools.com/facts/animals/bumblebee_facts/582/ )

Swimming For The Gold

Muskrat

F/ 6.3, 1/125, ISO 500.

Muskrat

What did one lab rat say to the other?

I’ve got my scientist so well trained that every time I push the buzzer, he brings me a snack.

Interesting Fact: Muskrats normally live in groups consisting of a male and female pair and their young. During the spring, they often fight with other muskrats over territory and potential mates. Many are injured or killed in these fights. Muskrat families build nests to protect themselves and their young from cold and predators. In streams, ponds or lakes, muskrats burrow into the bank with an underwater entrance. These entrances are 6–8 in (15–20 cm) wide. In marshes, push-ups are constructed from vegetation and mud. These push-ups are up to 3 ft (91 cm) in height. In snowy areas, they keep the openings to their push-ups closed by plugging them with vegetation, which they replace every day. Some muskrat push-ups are swept away in spring floods and have to be replaced each year. Muskrats also build feeding platforms in wetlands. They help maintain open areas in marshes, which helps to provide habitat for aquatic birds. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Muskrat )

That Worm Has To Come Out Sooner Or Later

White-throated Sparrow 1

F/6.3, 1/100, ISO 400.

White-throated Sparrow

What do you get if you cross a worm and an elephant?

Very big worm holes in your garden!

Interesting Fact: The oldest recorded White-throated Sparrow was at least 14 years, 11 months old, when it was recaptured and rereleased during banding operations in Alberta. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/White-throated_Sparrow/lifehistory )

Quack Quack Mother Ducker!

Bufflehead Duck 1

F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 250.

Bufflehead Duck 

The Teacher says to the class: Who ever stands up is stupid
*Nobody stands up*
Teacher: I said who ever stands up is STUPID!
*Little Johnny stands up*
Teacher: Johnny, do you really think that you are stupid?
Little Johnny: No Mrs, I just thought that maybe you are lonely being the only one standing.

Interesting Fact: Bufflehead normally live only in North America, but in winter they occasionally show up elsewhere, including Kamchatka, Japan, Greenland, Iceland, the British Isles, Belgium, France, Finland, and Czechoslovakia. In some of these cases, the birds may have escaped from captivity. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Bufflehead/lifehistory )

Lifeguard Is On Duty!

Canada Goose And Goslings

F/5.6, 1/500, ISO 200.

Canada Goose And Goslings 

Why won’t they allow elephants in public swimming pools?

Because they might let down their trunks.

Interesting Fact: Individual Canada Geese from most populations make annual northward migrations after breeding. Nonbreeding geese, or those that lost nests early in the breeding season, may move anywhere from several kilometers to more than 1500 km northward. There they take advantage of vegetation in an earlier state of growth to fuel their molt. Even members of “resident” populations, which do not migrate southward in winter, will move north in late summer to molt.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Canada_Goose/lifehistory )

I Am Not Yelling! This Is How I Talk!

Brown-headed Cowbird ( Female )

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 320.

Brown-headed Cowbird ( Female )

A man inserted an ‘ad’ in the classifieds: “Wife wanted.” Next day he received a hundred letters.

They all said the same thing: “You can have mine.”

Interesting Fact: Social relationships are difficult to figure out in birds that do not build nests, but male and female Brown-headed Cowbirds are not monogamous. Genetic analyses show that males and females have several different mates within a single season. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Brown-headed_Cowbird/lifehistory )

Spring Is In The Air Everywhere I Look Around

Spring Flowers

F/8.0, 1/250, ISO 250.

What did the tree wear to the pool party?

Swimming trunks!

Interesting Fact: In spring, the Earth‘s axis is tilted toward the sun, increasing the number of daylight hours and bringing warmer weather that causes plants to bring forth new growth.  ( http://www.22facts.com/spring/ )

You Can’t See Me I’m Camouflage!

Yellow-Rumped Warbler

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 400.

Yellow-Rumped Warbler

A magician was working on a cruise ship in the Caribbean.
The audience would be different each week, so the magician
allowed himself to do the same tricks over and over again.
There was only one problem:  The captain’s parrot saw the
shows each week and began to understand how the magician did
every trick.  Once he understood he started shouting in the
middle of the show:
“Look, it’s not the same hat”
“Look, he is hiding the flowers under the table”
“Hey, why are all the cards the Ace of Spades ?”
The magician was furious but couldn’t do anything, it was,
after all, the captain’s parrot.
One day the ship had an accident and sank.  The magician
found himself on a piece of wood in the middle of the ocean
with the parrot, of course.  They stared at each other with
hate, but did not utter a word.
This went on for a day and another and another.
After a week the parrot said:  “OK, I give up.  Where’s
the boat?”

Interesting Fact: The Yellow-rumped Warbler is the only warbler able to digest the waxes found in bayberries and wax myrtles. Its ability to use these fruits allows it to winter farther north than other warblers, sometimes as far north as Newfoundland.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Yellow-rumped_Warbler/lifehistory )

Yellow Means Slow Down And Watch Me

Palm Warbler

F/8.0, 1/200, ISO 320.

Palm Warbler

A male and a female pigeon made a date to meet on a ledge outside
the 14th floor of the Chrysler Building.  The male was there on time,
but the female arrived an hour late.
“Where were you?” he cried.  “I was worried sick.”
“It was such a nice day,” she explained, “I decided to walk.”

Interesting Fact: The Palm Warbler is found in two different forms. Birds that breed in the western part of the range are duller, and have whitish bellies. Those breeding in the eastern part of the range are entirely yellow underneath. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Palm_Warbler/lifehistory )