The Awkward Moment When You’re In Deep Thought, Then Realize You’re Staring Directly at Someone…

F/11.0, 1/500, ISO 400.

Ring-billed Gull 

Two guys are talking:

Guy 1: I’m on a .

Guy 2: Really.

Guy 1: I’ve lost three days already.

Interesting Fact: Some Ring-billed Gull nests at study sites in California and Oregon contained pebbles the size and shape of gull eggs. The parents apparently pulled the pebbles into their nests from the surrounding ground, mistaking them for eggs gone astray. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Ring-billed_Gull/lifehistory )

 

 

Sometimes I Get Road Rage From Standing In Lines.

F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 125.

Semipalmated Sandpipers

Why do ghosts ride in elevators?

It keeps their spirits up.

Interesting Fact: Semipalmated Sandpiper: Breeds in lower Arctic regions from western Alaska to Labrador. Migrates through central North America to the Atlantic coast to reach its wintering grounds, which extend from the extreme southern U.S. to the Caribbean Islands and South America. Preferred habitats include shorelines and mudflats. ( http://identify.whatbird.com/obj/427/overview/Semipalmated_Sandpiper.aspx )

 

I May Look Like I’m Having Deep Thoughts, But Really I Need To Fart.

F/13.0, 1/640, ISO 400.

Semipalmated Sandpiper

Why do scuba divers fall backwards into the water?

Because if they fell forwards they’d still be in the boat.

Interesting Fact:  Semipalmated Sandpipers from eastern populations probably undertake nonstop transoceanic flights of 3,000 – 4,000 km (1,900 – 2,500 mi) from New England and southern Canada to South America, powered by extensive fat reserves. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Semipalmated_Sandpiper/lifehistory )

 

Sharks Aren’t The Bad Guys. If Some Stranger Entered My House In Just A SPEEDO, I Would Probably Attack Him Too.

Shark Week 

F/5.6, 1/500, ISO 360.

Spiny Dogfish Shark

What is a sharks favorite sci-fi show?

Shark Trek

Interesting Fact: Spiny dogfish are bottom-dwellers. They are commonly found at depths of around 50–149 m (164–489 ft), but have been found deeper than 700 m (2,300 ft). ( https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spiny_dogfish )

Being Small Works For Me!

F/5.6, 1/500, ISO 220.

Least Sandpiper

Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert?

Because he was stuffed.

Interesting Fact: The Least Sandpiper is the smallest shorebird in the world, weighing in at about 1 ounce and measuring 5-6 inches long. Males are slightly smaller than females. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Least_Sandpiper )

They Were Born To Fly And Touch The Sky

F/13.0, 1/640, ISO 400.

Semipalmated Sandpipers

What is a bunny’s favorite music?

Hip-hop.

Interesting Fact: The Semipalmated Sandpiper gets its common name from the short webs between its toes (“palmated” means webbed). The Western Sandpiper is the only other small sandpiper with similarly webbed toes. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Semipalmated_Sandpiper/lifehistory )

We Are Looking At You!

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 250.

Semipalmated Sandpipers

What never asks questions but receives a lot of answers?

The Telephone.

Interesting Fact: The oldest recorded Semipalmated Sandpiper was at least 14 years, 2 months old when it was recaptured and rereleased during banding operations in New Brunswick. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Semipalmated_Sandpiper/overview )

Play In The Dirt Because Life Is Too Short To Always Have Clean Fingernails.

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 250.

Semipalmated Plover

What did one elevator say to the other elevator?

I think I’m coming down with something!

Interesting Fact: Semipalmated plovers forage for food on beaches, tidal flats and fields, usually by sight. They eat insects, crustaceans and worms. This bird resembles the killdeer but is much smaller and has only one band. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Semipalmated_plover )

I Swear, I Am One Cocktail Away From Telling Everyone What I Really Think!

F/8.0, 1/250, ISO 160.

Least Sandpiper

A Sandwich walks into a bar.

The bartender says “Sorry, we don’t serve food here”

Interesting Fact: Researchers studying Least Sandpipers discovered a new feeding mechanism. While probing damp mud with their bills, the sandpipers use the surface tension of the water to transport prey quickly from their bill tips to their mouths. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Least_Sandpiper/ )

Let Me Play In The Mud!

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 160.

Semipalmated Sandpiper

What is the difference between erotic and kinky?

Erotic is using a feather… kinky is using the whole chicken.

Interesting Fact: Their breeding habitat is the southern tundra in Canada and Alaska near water. They nest on the ground. The male makes several shallow scrapes; the female chooses one and adds grass and other material to line the nest. The female lays 4 eggs; the male assists in incubation. After a few days, the female leaves the young with the male; the young feed themselves. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Semipalmated_sandpiper )