Welcome To The Duck Side. We Have Quackers.

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Ruddy Duck 

Why didn’t my girlfriend believe I was a ghost?

She could see right through me.

Interesting Fact:  The nest is usually made of dead, dry plant materials, though some are built entirely with green vegetation. It starts as a platform and becomes more bowl-like throughout the construction process, with an inner cup measuring 4–12 inches across and 0.5–5 inches deep. Ruddy Ducks usually weave a canopy of vegetation over their nests. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Ruddy_Duck/lifehistory )

Bad Hair Day: Ain’t Nobody Got Time For That!

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Red-breasted Mergansers 

Can February March?

No, but April May.

Interesting Fact:Red-breasted Mergansers nest along forested riverbanks, marsh edges, lakeshores, coastal islands, and sandy shores with vegetation. They are never far from water. Female Red-breasted Mergansers select a spot on the ground under dense cover from low tree branches, fallen logs, or boulders. They nest alone or in colonies often with gulls and terns. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Red-breasted_Merganser/lifehistory )

 

 

Don’t Look Back You’re Not Going That Way

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Least Sandpiper

Browsing in a pet shop, a man sees a beautiful parrot with a red
string tied to its left leg and a green string tied to its right
leg, and asks the store owner about the different colored strings.
“This is a highly-trained parrot,” the owner explains. “If you
pull the red string, he’ll speak French.  If you pull the green
string, he’ll speak Spanish.”
The customer asks, “What happens if I pull both strings?”
“I’ll fall off my perch, dummy!” screeches the parrot.

Interesting Fact: Eastern populations probably fly nonstop over the ocean from the Gulf of St. Lawrence and New England to wintering grounds in northeastern South America, a distance of about 1,800 to 2,500 miles. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Least_Sandpiper/lifehistory )

 

Sing… The World Needs Your Music In It.

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Eastern Wood-Pewee

Why can’t you write with a broken pencil?

Because it’s pointless.

Interesting Fact: The Eastern Wood-Pewee’s lichen-covered nest is so inconspicuous that it often looks like a knot on a branch. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Eastern_Wood-Pewee )

 

 

I See Sky Of Blue!

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Eastern Bluebird 

Imagine you are in a water tank with a roof. There are no objects in the tank to help you escape. How do you get out?

Stop imagining.

Interesting Fact: Males vying over territories chase each other at high speed, sometimes grappling with their feet, pulling at feathers with their beaks, and hitting with their wings. The boxes and tree cavities where bluebirds nest are a hot commodity among birds that require holes for nesting, and male bluebirds will attack other species they deem a threat, including House Sparrows, European Starlings, Tree Swallows, Great Crested Flycatchers, Carolina Chickadees, and Brown-headed Nuthatches, as well as non-cavity nesters such as robins, Blue Jays, mockingbirds, and cowbirds. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Eastern_Bluebird/lifehistory )

I Am Coming For You!

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Ruddy Duck ( Juvenile ) 

Why are elephants such poor dancers?

Because they have two left feet.

Interesting Fact: Ruddy Ducks get harassed by Horned Grebes, Pied-billed Grebes, and American Coots during the breeding season. The grebes sometimes attack Ruddy Ducks from below the water, a behavior known as “submarining.” ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Ruddy_Duck )

People Say Nothing Is Impossible, But I Do Nothing Every Day.

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Ruddy Duck 

Why are mountains so funny?

Because they are hill areas.

Interesting Fact: Most males pair up with one female each for the duration of the breeding season, but some take multiple mates. Their eggs are proportionally the largest of all waterfowl. The ducklings hatch well-developed and active, receiving minimal care from the mother and none from the father. Ducklings are preyed upon by Black-crowned Night-Herons, Ring-billed Gulls, California Gulls, mink, and raccoons. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Ruddy_Duck/lifehistory )

 

I Walk On Water. What’s Your Superpower!

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Green-Winged Teal

Why do writers always feel cold?

Because they have lots of drafts in their office.

Interesting Facts: Green-winged Teal are fast, agile, buoyant flyers. They can take off straight from the water without running across the surface. Though they are dabbling ducks that usually tip up to feed, they occasionally dive for food and to avoid predators. In winter Green-winged Teal gather in roosting flocks of up to 50,000 birds. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Green-winged_Teal/lifehistory )

 

 

And Since I Have No Place To Go Let It Snow, Let It Snow, Let It Snow.

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Northern Cardinal Female

Why did the baseball coach throw Cinderella off the team?

Because she ran away from the ball.

Interesting Fact: A week or two before the female starts building, she starts to visit possible nest sites with the male following along. The pair call back and forth and hold nesting material in their bills as they assess each site. Nests tend to be wedged into a fork of small branches in a sapling, shrub, or vine tangle, 1-15 feet high and hidden in dense foliage. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Northern_Cardinal/lifehistory )

 

 

 

Is Your Tail Up For A Reason Or You Just Happy To See Me?!

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Ruddy Duck

Why are Christmas trees so bad at sewing?

They always drop their needles!

Interesting Fact:  Unlike most ducks, they form pairs only after arriving on the breeding grounds each year. Males perform unusual courtship displays in which they stick their tails straight up while striking their bills against their inflated necks, creating bubbles in the water as air is forced from their feathers. They punctuate the end of the display with a belch-like call. Courting males also lower their tails and run across the water, making popping sounds with their feet. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Ruddy_Duck/lifehistory )