Waiting Here For You

F/13.0, 1/640, ISO 320.

Great Black-backed Gull

Four high school boys afflicted with spring fever skipped morning classes. After lunch they reported to the teacher that they had a flat tire.

Much to their relief she smiled and said, “Well, you missed a test today so take seats apart from one another and take out a piece of paper.”

Still smiling, she waited for them to sit down. Then she said: “First Question: Which tire was flat?”

Interesting Fact: The Great Black-backed Gull is one of many bird species whose feathers were used for fashionable clothing in the 1800s. After the demise of the feather trade in the early 1900s, Great Black-backed Gull populations increased and spread farther south. Garbage dumps and other sources of human refuse have contributed to their range expansion. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Great_Black-backed_Gull/lifehistory )

HEY BOO BOO!!!

F/6.3, 1/60. ISO 640.

American Black Bear

How does a tree get on the internet?

He logs in

Interesting Fact: American black bears have better eyesight and hearing than humans. Their keenest sense is their sense of smell, which is about seven times more sensitive than a domestic dog’s.[64] American black bears are excellent and strong swimmers, swimming for pleasure and to feed (largely on fish). ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/American_black_bear )

Be Your Self Everyone Else Is Already Taken!

F/6.3, 1/400, ISO 1600.

Hooded Merganser ( Male )

Did you hear that all the toilets at the police station were stolen?

Yeah… the cops got nothing to go on.

Interesting Fact: Hooded Merganser ducklings leave their nest cavity within 24 hours of hatching. First, their mother checks the area around the nest and calls to the nestlings from ground level. From inside the nest, the little fluffballs scramble up to the entrance hole and then flutter to the ground, which may be 50 feet or more below them. In some cases they have to walk half a mile or more with their mother to the nearest body of water. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Hooded_Merganser )

Go Ahead… Make My Day!

F/6.3, 1/500, ISO 250.

Hooded Merganser ( Female )

What insect runs away from everything?

A flea!

Interesting Fact: Once a female begins incubating eggs her mate abandons her, and it’s not known if they reunite the following season. Incubating females may use a broken-wing display to protect eggs or nestlings from raccoons, mink, black rat snakes, black bears, pine martens, European Starlings, Northern Flickers, Red-headed Woodpeckers, and Red-bellied Woodpeckers. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Hooded_Merganser/lifehistory )

 

Dear Life, When I Said ” Can My Day Get Any Worst” It Was A Rhetorical Question Not A Challenge.

F/6.3, 1/250, ISO 800.

White-Tailed Deer ( Fawn )

Which branch of the military do babies join?

The infantry!

Interesting Fact: White tailed deer can run as fast as 36 mph, jump as high as 8 1/2 feet, and leap as far as 30 feet. They are also very good swimmers. ( https://www.brighthub.com/environment/science-environmental/articles/48142.aspx )

 

 

If You Can’t Convince Them, Confuse Them.

F/6.3, 1/500, ISO 200.

Brant

What kind of shoes do you make with banana skins?

Slippers!

Interesting Fact: The Brant is also known as the Brent Goose. The spelling “Brant” is the original one, with “Brent” being a later folk-etymological idea that it was derived from a classical Greek water bird name brenthos. It actually came from the guttural call note of the species. ( http://identify.whatbird.com/obj/290/overview/Brant.aspx )

 

 

In Three Words I Can Sum Up Everything I’ve Learned About Life. IT GOES ON.

F/6.3, 1/640, ISO 200.

Canvesback

What do you call it when you have your Grandma on speed dial?

Instagram

Interesting Fact: Canvasbacks are social outside of the breeding season; they gather in large rafts by the thousands to tens of thousands. Only when winter food is scarce or clumped do they defend foraging areas against other Canvasbacks. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Canvasback/lifehistory )

 

 

Fly Above The Negativity!

F/6.3, 1/1000, ISO 500.

Great Blue Heron 

Why was Frosty told to leave the grocery store?

Because he was caught picking his nose in the produce isle.

Interesting Fact: Despite their impressive size, Great Blue Herons weigh only 5 to 6 pounds thanks in part to their hollow bones—a feature all birds share.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Great_Blue_Heron/overview )

 

Time Is Just Flying By

F/6.3, 1/500, ISO 250.

Northern Pintail Duck 

A man walks into an army surplus store and asks if they have any camouflage jackets.

“Yes, we do,” replies the assistant. “But we can’t find any of them.”

Interesting Fact: The female makes several scrapes in the ground before she starts building the nest, ultimately choosing the last scrape made. She slowly adds grasses and down to the depression while laying eggs to form a shallow bowl approximately 7–10 inches wide and 2–4 inches deep. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Northern_Pintail/lifehistory )