Life Is Only A Reflection Of What We Allow Ourselves To See

mallard-5

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 320.

Mallard

A duck waddles into a card shop, he waddles his way to the front desk asking the clerk, Do you got any tape?

The clerk replies, No. So the duck waddles away. The very next day at the same time the same duck waddles into the Card Shop he waddles right up to that same clerk asking him, Do you have any tape?

The clerk looking irritated replying in a stern voice, No! We are a card shop we sell cards not tape! And if you ask me again I will nail your bill to the counter!

So the duck just waddles away. At the same time the next day the Duck is waddling into that same card shop He waddles right up to that same clerk asking him, do you have any nails? The clerk says, no. Then the duck replied good!! So do you have any tape?

Interesting Fact: Mallard pairs form long before the spring breeding season. Pairing takes place in the fall, but courtship can be seen all winter. Only the female incubates the eggs and takes care of the ducklings. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Mallard/lifehistory )

That Ducking Motherquacker!

F/10.0, 1/1600, ISO 800. 

Common Merganser

What’s the secret to telling a good postman joke?

It’s all in the delivery

Interesting Fact: Males chase each other during communal courtship displays, sometimes bumping or striking each other. Females sometimes lay their eggs in other ducks’ nests, including other Common Mergansers as well as Hooded Mergansers or Common Goldeneyes.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Common_Merganser/lifehistory )

Keep On Knockin!

F/8.0, 1/800, ISO 800.

Red-Bellied Woodpecker 

What did one traffic light say to the other?

Don’t look at me while I’m changing!

Interesting Fact: These birds often stick to main branches and trunks of trees, where they hitch in classic woodpecker fashion, leaning away from the trunk and onto their stiff tail feathers as they search for food hiding in bark crevices. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Red-bellied_Woodpecker/lifehistory )

 

 

Branch Manager

yellow-rumped-warbler

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 500.

Yellow-Rumped Warbler

What did the tree do when the bank closed?

It started its own branch.

Interesting Fact: Male Yellow-rumped Warblers tend to forage higher in trees than females do. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Yellow-rumped_Warbler/lifehistory )

 

Hush, little baby, don’t say a word, Mama’s gonna buy you a mockingbird

F/7.1, 1/800, ISO 200.

Northern Mockingbird

Why shouldn’t you fart in an Apple Store?

They don’t have Windows.

Interesting Fact: Northern mockingbirds tend to imitate other birds and sounds they hear.  This bird is very territorial and will not hesitate to attack intruders.  ( https://americanexpedition.us/northern-mockingbird-facts-photos-and-information )

The Sky Speaks In A Thousand Colours.

F/4.5, 1/60, ISO 400.

Did you hear about the astronaut that stepped on the chewing gum?

He got stuck in orbit !

Interesting Fact: As a ray of white sunlight travels through the atmosphere to an observer, some of the colors are scattered out of the beam by air molecules and airborne particles, changing the final color of the beam the viewer sees. Because the shorter wavelength components, such as blue and green, scatter more strongly, these colors are preferentially removed from the beam. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sunset#Historically )

 

They Call Us The Brown Bombers!

F/6.3, 1/640, ISO 240.

Canvasback

How does NASA organize a birthday party?

They planet!

Interesting Fact: Canvasbacks are diving ducks at home in the water, seldom going ashore to dry land. They sleep on the water with their bill tucked under the wing, and they nest on floating mats of vegetation. To get airborne Canvasbacks need a running start, but once in the air they are strong and fast fliers, clocking airspeeds of up to 56 miles per hour. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Canvasback/lifehistory )

 

 

That’s Despicable!

F/10.0, 1/1600, ISO 800.

Canada Goose 

How do we know that insects are so clever?

Because they always know when your eating outside!

Interesting Fact: They mate for life with very low “divorce rates,” and pairs remain together throughout the year. Geese mate “assortatively,” larger birds choosing larger mates and smaller ones choosing smaller mates; in a given pair, the male is usually larger than the female. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Canada_Goose/lifehistory )

 

 

We Are Family!

F/8.0, 1/2500, ISO 800.

Common Merganser

What do you call a snowman in the summer?

Puddle

Interesting Fact: Common Mergansers spend much of their time afloat, loafing, fishing, and often sleeping on open water. They may form flocks of up to 75 individuals. They often swim in small groups along the shoreline, dipping their heads underwater to search for prey and then diving with a slight leap. Often when one bird dives in a large group, the others follow the leader and disappear. They can stay under for up to 2 minutes, but they normally dive for less than 30 seconds. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Common_Merganser/lifehistory )

 

Don’t Play Dead With A Vulture. That’s Exactly What They Want.

turkey-vulture

F/6.3, 1/160, ISO 100.

Turkey Vulture

As migration approached, two elderly vultures doubted they could make the trip south, so they decided to go by airplane.

When they checked their baggage, the attendant noticed that they were carrying two dead raccoons. “Do you wish to check the raccoons through as luggage?” she asked.

“No, thanks,” replied the vultures. “They’re carrion.”

Interesting Fact: Turkey Vultures, like other carrion birds, are protected from disease associated with decaying animals by a very sophisticated immune system. ( http://identify.whatbird.com/mwg/_/0/identify.whatbird.com/obj/117/overview/Turkey_Vulture.aspx )