Cause I’m A Wanderer!

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 400. 

White-breasted Nuthatch

What was the murderer’s last request to the priest as he sat in the electric chair?

Will you hold my hand?

Interesting Fact: White-breasted Nuthatches forage up, down, and sideways over tree trunks and around large branches. They often (though not always) start high in trees and move down them head first, pausing to crane their necks up and back, toward the horizontal, for a look around. They probe into bark crevices or chip away at wood to find food. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/White-breasted_Nuthatch/lifehistory )

 

Let’s Go!

F/11.0, 1/500, ISO 400.

Black-capped Chickadee

Two snakes are talking.

One of them turns to the other and asks, “Are we venomous?”

The other replays, “Yes, why?…”

“I just bit ma lip.”

Interesting Fact: Most birds that associate with chickadee flocks respond to chickadee alarm calls, even when their own species doesn’t have a similar alarm call. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Black-capped_Chickadee/lifehistory )

Two Peckers One Hole

F/8.0, 1/250, ISO 320.

Hispaniolan Woodpeckers

How do crazy people get through the forest?

They take the psycho path.

Interesting Fact: The Hispaniolan Woodpecker is sufficiently abundant to be considered an agricultural pest in some areas, on account of it feeding in fruit orchards, although it also regularly consumes insects and tree sap. It nests in tree-cavities and breeds in loose colonies of up to 20 pairs. ( https://neotropical.birds.cornell.edu/Species-Account/nb/species/hiswoo1/overview )

I Have A Funny Feeling It’s Going To Be One Of Those Days!

F/5.6, 1/125, ISO 250.

Black Vulture

A farmer goes out and buys a new, young rooster. As soon as he brings him home, the
young rooster rushes and screws all 150 of the farmers hens. The farmer is impressed.
At lunchtime, the young rooster again screws all 150 hens. The farmer is not just impressed anymore,he is worried. Next morning,not only is the rooster screwin…g the hens but he is screwing the turkeys,ducks even the cow.
Later farmer looks out into the barnyard and finds the rooster stretched out, limp as a rag, his eyes closed, dead and vultures circling overhead.
The farmer runs out, looks down at the young roosters limp body and says: “You deserved it, you horny bastard!”
And the young rooster opens one eye, points up at the vultures with his wing, and says, Shhhh!,they are about to land.”

Interesting Fact: One-on-one at a carcass, Black Vultures lose out to the slightly larger Turkey Vulture. But flocks of Black Vultures can quickly take over a carcass and drive the more solitary Turkey Vultures away. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Black_Vulture/lifehistory )

Come Out Come Out Wherever You Are?!

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 400.

Red-tailed Hawk

Which runs faster, hot or cold?

HOT. Everyone can catch cold.

Interesting Fact: Red-tailed Hawks are large, sharp-taloned birds that can be aggressive when defending nests or territories. They frequently chase off other hawks, eagles, and Great Horned Owls. Courting birds fly with legs hanging beneath them, or chase and swoop after each other, sometimes locking talons. Mated pairs typically stay together until one of the pair dies. ( https://throughopenlens.com/tag/red-tailed-hawk/ )

Don’t Rush Me I’m Waiting For The Last Minute!

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 800.

Belted Kingfisher

Why can’t you write with a broken pencil?

Because it’s pointless.

Interesting Fact: During breeding season the Belted Kingfisher pair defends a territory against other kingfishers. A territory along a stream includes just the streambed and the vegetation along it, and averages 0.6 mile long. The nest burrow is usually in a dirt bank near water. The tunnel slopes upward from the entrance, perhaps to keep water from entering the nest. Tunnel length ranges from 1 to 8 feet. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Belted_Kingfisher )

 

 

Are You Talking To Me?!

northern-cardinal-4

F/6.3, 1/250, ISO 450.

Northern Cardinal

What did little Tom’s mother do when she caught him zapping the other children with static electricity?

She grounded him.

Interesting Fact: The oldest recorded Northern Cardinal was a female, and was 15 years, 9 months old when she was found in Pennsylvania. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Northern_Cardinal/lifehistory )

If You Can’t Reach It You Don’t Need It!

F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 400.

Pileated Woodpecker

How are a husband and a cat similar when it comes to housework?

They both hide when they see the vacuum cleaner.

Interesting Fact: The feeding excavations of a Pileated Woodpecker are so extensive that they often attract other birds. Other woodpeckers, as well as House Wrens, may come and feed there. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Pileated_Woodpecker )

 

I Forgot My Swimsuit!

F/5.6, 1/500, ISO 200.

Horned Grebe

What do you get when you’re on you hands and knees?

You get very dirty.

Interesting Fact: A sleeping or resting Horned Grebe puts its neck on its back with its head off to one side and facing forward. It keeps one foot tucked up under a wing and uses the other one to maneuver in the water. Having one foot up under a wing makes it float with one “high” side and one “low” side. (https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Horned_Grebe/overview# ).

 

Just Like The Seasons, People Have The Ability To Change

F/5.6, 1/125, ISO 280

What did one autumn leaf say to another?

I’m falling for you.

Interesting Fact: Fall is a peak migration time for many species of birds. During autumn, birds will fly to other areas seeking more hospitable climates. The Arctic tern journeys about 11,000 miles each way for its annual migration. That is like going all the way across the United States about three and a half times. ( http://www.richmond.com/life/celebrations/article_aa9e91de-402a-11e4-8c0f-001a4bcf6878.html )