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When You Stop Beliving In Santa You Get Underwear

December 25, 2020 — 50 Comments

Merry Christmas And Happy Holidays To All

F/22.0, 30.0, ISO 250.

Why is Santa so jolly?

Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.

Interesting Fact:  The first known electrically illuminated Christmas tree was the creation of Edward H. Johnson, an associate of inventor Thomas Edison. While he was vice president of the Edison Electric Light Company, a predecessor of today’s Con Edison electric utility, he had Christmas tree light bulbs especially made for him. He proudly displayed his Christmas tree, which was hand-wired with 80 red, white and blue electric incandescent light bulbs the size of walnuts, on December 22, 1882 at his home on Fifth Avenue in New York City. Local newspapers ignored the story, seeing it as a publicity stunt. However, it was published by a Detroit newspaper reporter, and Johnson has become widely regarded as the Father of Electric Christmas Tree Lights. By 1900, businesses started stringing up Christmas lights behind their windows.[14] Christmas lights were too expensive for the average person; as such, electric Christmas lights did not become the majority replacement for candles until 1930. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christmas_lights#History )

Snow Way!

December 22, 2020 — 48 Comments

F/8.0, 1/250, ISO 400.

Northern Cardinal ( Male )

In the class room

Bobby: ” Can I go the toilet? ” 

Teacher: ” Say the alphabet ”

Bobby: ” ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOQRSTUVWXYZ “

Teacher: “Where’s the P “

Bobby: ” Half way down my leg “

Interesting Fact: Northern Cardinals hop through low branches and forage on or near the ground. Cardinals commonly sing and preen from a high branch of a shrub. The distinctive crest can be raised and pointed when agitated or lowered and barely visible while resting. You typically see cardinals moving around in pairs during the breeding season, but in fall and winter they can form fairly large flocks of a dozen to several dozen birds. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Northern_Cardinal/lifehistory#behavior )

People That Take Advice From Duck Are Downright Loony

December 18, 2020 — 15 Comments

F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 800.

Common Loon ( Nonbreeding adult )

What computer sings the best?

A Dell.

Interesting Fact: Loons are agile swimmers, but they move pretty fast in the air, too. Migrating loons have been clocked flying at speeds more than 70 mph. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Common_Loon/lifehistory )

I’m So High!

December 15, 2020 — 9 Comments

F/6.3, 1/2500, ISO 320.

Red-tailed Hawk

One day a man came home from work to find his wife crying hysterically in the kitchen.

“What’s wrong, dearest?” asked the confused husband.

“Oh darling,” sobbed the wife,

“I was cleaning little Jen’s room when I found whips, handcuffs and chains under her bed, along with a very erotic porn magazine! What ever are we going to do?”

“Well,” replied the man, “I guess a spanking is out of the question?”

Interesting Fact: The oldest known wild Red-tailed Hawk was at least 30 years, 8 months old when it was found in Michigan in 2011, the same state where it had been banded in 1981. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Red-tailed_Hawk/overview )

I Got Blue More Than You!

December 12, 2020 — 11 Comments

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 320.

Eastern Bluebird

In Court:

Judge: “Why did you steal the car?”

Defendant: “Your Honour I had to get to work.”

Judge: “Why didn’t you take the bus?”

Defendant: I don’t have a driver’s license for the bus.

Interesting Fact: Eastern Bluebirds occur across eastern North America and south as far as Nicaragua. Birds that live farther north and in the west of the range tend to lay more eggs than eastern and southern birds.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Eastern_Bluebird )

Be Bold, Be Brave Enough To Be Your True Self!

December 11, 2020 — 29 Comments

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 1250.

Bald Eagles

What falls but never gets hurt?

The rain!

Interesting Fact: Bald Eagles occasionally hunt cooperatively, with one individual flushing prey towards another. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Bald_Eagle )

Together We Fly!

December 9, 2020 — 29 Comments

F/13.0, 1/640, ISO 400.

Mallard

As a scarecrow, people say I’m outstanding in my field.

But hay, it’s in my jeans.

Interesting Fact: Mallards, like other ducks, shed all their flight feathers at the end of the breeding season and are flightless for 3–4 weeks. They are secretive during this vulnerable time, and their body feathers molt into a concealing “eclipse” plumage that can make them hard to identify. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Mallard )

You Want A Little Bit Of The Top?!

December 8, 2020 — 9 Comments

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 160.

Sandhill Crane

A guy walks into a bar with a set of jumper cables…

the bartender says, buddy, I’ll serve you as long as you don’t start anything.

Interesting Fact:  Sandhill Crane chicks can leave the nest within 8 hours of hatching, and are even capable of swimming. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Sandhill_Crane/overview )

How low can you go?

December 5, 2020 — 15 Comments

northern-shoveler-2

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 250.

Northern Shoveler 

How do you know if there’s a snowman in your bed?

You wake up wet!

Interesting Fact: The bill of the Northern Shoveler is about 6.5 cm (2.5 inches) long. The bill has has about 110 fine projections (called lamellae) along the edges, for straining food from water. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Northern_Shoveler/lifehistory )

I Tried To Grab The Fog But I Mist.

December 4, 2020 — 40 Comments

F/22.0, 2.0, ISO64.

Hudson River Waterfront Walkway, Jersey City, NJ

What did one raindrop say to the other raindrop?

My plop is bigger than your plop.

Interesting Fact:   Fog normally occurs at a relative humidity near 100%.[15] This occurs from either added moisture in the air, or falling ambient air temperature.[15] However, fog can form at lower humidities, and can sometimes fail to form with relative humidity at 100%. At 100% relative humidity, the air cannot hold additional moisture, thus, the air will become supersaturated if additional moisture is added. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fog )