I Have A Funny Feeling It’s Going To Be One Of Those Days!

F/5.6, 1/125, ISO 250.

Black Vulture

A farmer goes out and buys a new, young rooster. As soon as he brings him home, the
young rooster rushes and screws all 150 of the farmers hens. The farmer is impressed.
At lunchtime, the young rooster again screws all 150 hens. The farmer is not just impressed anymore,he is worried. Next morning,not only is the rooster screwin…g the hens but he is screwing the turkeys,ducks even the cow.
Later farmer looks out into the barnyard and finds the rooster stretched out, limp as a rag, his eyes closed, dead and vultures circling overhead.
The farmer runs out, looks down at the young roosters limp body and says: “You deserved it, you horny bastard!”
And the young rooster opens one eye, points up at the vultures with his wing, and says, Shhhh!,they are about to land.”

Interesting Fact: One-on-one at a carcass, Black Vultures lose out to the slightly larger Turkey Vulture. But flocks of Black Vultures can quickly take over a carcass and drive the more solitary Turkey Vultures away. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Black_Vulture/lifehistory )

Come Out Come Out Wherever You Are?!

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 400.

Red-tailed Hawk

Which runs faster, hot or cold?

HOT. Everyone can catch cold.

Interesting Fact: Red-tailed Hawks are large, sharp-taloned birds that can be aggressive when defending nests or territories. They frequently chase off other hawks, eagles, and Great Horned Owls. Courting birds fly with legs hanging beneath them, or chase and swoop after each other, sometimes locking talons. Mated pairs typically stay together until one of the pair dies. ( https://throughopenlens.com/tag/red-tailed-hawk/ )

Don’t Rush Me I’m Waiting For The Last Minute!

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 800.

Belted Kingfisher

Why can’t you write with a broken pencil?

Because it’s pointless.

Interesting Fact: During breeding season the Belted Kingfisher pair defends a territory against other kingfishers. A territory along a stream includes just the streambed and the vegetation along it, and averages 0.6 mile long. The nest burrow is usually in a dirt bank near water. The tunnel slopes upward from the entrance, perhaps to keep water from entering the nest. Tunnel length ranges from 1 to 8 feet. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Belted_Kingfisher )

 

 

Are You Talking To Me?!

northern-cardinal-4

F/6.3, 1/250, ISO 450.

Northern Cardinal

What did little Tom’s mother do when she caught him zapping the other children with static electricity?

She grounded him.

Interesting Fact: The oldest recorded Northern Cardinal was a female, and was 15 years, 9 months old when she was found in Pennsylvania. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Northern_Cardinal/lifehistory )

Shouting Out The Wrong Part Of The Song With Confidence!

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 320.

Ovenbird

A wife told her husband to whisper dirty things to her, the husband then replies,

“The kitchen, the living room, the conservatory and the dining room.”

Interesting Fact: On its breeding ground, the Ovenbird divides up the forest environment with the other warblers of the forest floor. The Ovenbird uses the uplands and moderately sloped areas, the Worm-eating Warbler uses the steep slopes, and the Louisiana Waterthrush and the Kentucky Warbler use the low-lying areas. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Ovenbird/lifehistory )

I Am Not Proud Of What I Did

Happy Halloween!

F/ 6.3, 1/125, ISO 1600.

Peregrine Falcon

Why do ghosts like to ride in elevators?

It raises their spirits.

Interesting Fact: Peregrine Falcons are very strong fliers and often reported to be the fastest bird in the world. Their average cruising flight speed is 24 to 33 mph, increasing to 67 mph when in pursuit of prey. When stooping, or dropping on prey with their wings closed, it’s been calculated that Peregrine Falcons can achieve speeds of 238 mph. One researcher studied trained Peregrine Falcons while skydiving and described their body position while diving at 150 mph and 200 mph. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Peregrine_Falcon/lifehistory )

My Best Friend Is My Reflection!

F/ 6.3, 1/640, ISO 200.

Snowy Egret

Did you here about the mathematician who was afraid of negative numbers?

He will stop at nothing to avoid them.

Interesting Fact: The oldest Snowy Egret on record was at least 17 years, 7 months old. It was banded in Colorado in 1970 and found in Mexico in 1988. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Snowy_Egret )

If You Can’t Reach It You Don’t Need It!

F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 400.

Pileated Woodpecker

How are a husband and a cat similar when it comes to housework?

They both hide when they see the vacuum cleaner.

Interesting Fact: The feeding excavations of a Pileated Woodpecker are so extensive that they often attract other birds. Other woodpeckers, as well as House Wrens, may come and feed there. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Pileated_Woodpecker )

 

Don’t Be Afraid To Stick Your Neck Out!

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 100.

Mute Swan

What did one potato chip say to the other?

Shall we go for a dip?

Interesting Fact: Short legs placed well back on the body give Mute Swans an awkward walking gait, but the birds can run quickly if pursued and can take off from land and water, flying with head and neck extended. On the water they sometimes hold their wings slightly raised and “sail” with the wind. Mute Swans are predominantly monogamous and form long-lasting breeding pairs. They are extremely aggressive in defending their breeding territory. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Mute_Swan/lifehistory )

I Forgot My Swimsuit!

F/5.6, 1/500, ISO 200.

Horned Grebe

What do you get when you’re on you hands and knees?

You get very dirty.

Interesting Fact: A sleeping or resting Horned Grebe puts its neck on its back with its head off to one side and facing forward. It keeps one foot tucked up under a wing and uses the other one to maneuver in the water. Having one foot up under a wing makes it float with one “high” side and one “low” side. (https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Horned_Grebe/overview# ).