Hold It Until We Find A Clean Car!

F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 200. 

Brown Pelican

How do you make holy water?

Boil the hell out of it!

Interesting Fact: Though they have an awkward gait on land, Brown Pelicans are strong swimmers and masterful fliers. They fly to and from their fishing grounds in V-formations or lines just above the water’s surface. They and the closely related Peruvian Pelican are the only pelican species to perform spectacular head-first dives (typically ending in a huge splash visible from far away) to trap fish.  ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Brown_Pelican/lifehistory )

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Are You Tailing Me Because That Would Be Super!

northern-pintail-duck-1

F/6.3, 1/500, ISO 250.

Northern Pintail Duck

What do you call someone without a nose or a body?

Nobodynose.

Interesting Fact: The oldest recorded Northern Pintail was a male and at least 22 years, 3 months old when he was found in Saskatchewan, Canada. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Northern_Pintail/lifehistory )

Save Water Take Baths With A Friend!

F/11.0, 1/500, ISO 400.

Northern Shoveler

What did the duck say when he dropped the dishes?

“I hope I didn’t quack any!”

Interesting Fact: Females use their body, feet, and bill to make a small depression on the ground about 8 inches wide. The nest scrape is usually surrounded on at least three sides by vegetation and lined with downy feathers. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Northern_Shoveler/lifehistory )

 

 

Wait, What Did You Said?

F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 250.

Blue Jay

Why is your foot more special than your other body parts?

Because they have their own soul.

Interesting Fact: Blue Jays are found in all kinds of forests but especially near oak trees; they’re more abundant near forest edges than in deep forest. They’re common in urban and suburban areas, especially where oaks or bird feeders are found. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Blue_Jay/lifehistory )

So, You Are The Quiet Type, I Like That.

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 250.

Black-capped Chickadee 

“How do you shoot a killer bee?”

“With a bee bee gun.”

Interesting Fact: Adult chickadees don’t migrate. In years when chickadee reproduction is high, young birds sometimes move large distances, but these movements are irregular and are more accurately called “irruptions.”( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Black-capped_Chickadee )

 

Emo Ducks

red-breasted-mergansers

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 200.

Red-breasted Mergansers

Is it dangerous to swim on a full stomach?

Yes. It’s better to swim in water.

Interesting Fact: The Red-breasted Merganser breeds farther north and winters farther south than the other American mergansers. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Red-breasted_Merganser/lifehistory )

I’m Not Trying To Impress You Or Anything, But I Can Swim Without Floaties.

western-grebe-1

F/7.1, 1/800, ISO 200.

Western Grebe

A man was stranded on a desert island for 10 years.
One day a beautiful girl swims to shore in a wet suit.
Man: “Hi! Am I ever happy to see you.”!
Girl: “Hi! It seems like you’ve been here along time. How long has it been since you’ve had a cigarette?”
Man: “It’s been ten years!”
With this information the girl unzips a slot on the arm of her wet suit and gives the man cigarette.
Man: “Oh thank you so much!”
Girl: “So tell me how long its been since you had a drink?”
Man: “It’s been ten years” The girl unzips a little longer zipper on her wet suit and comes out with a flask of whiskey and gives the man a drink.
Man: “Oh. Thank you so much. You are like a miracle”!
Finally the girl starts to unzip the front of her wet suit and asks the man leadingly, “So tell me then, have you been bored?”
The man looked at her and said excitedly: “Oh, my God, don’t tell me you’ve got a surfboard in there too?”

 

Interesting Fact: Western Grebes breed on freshwater lakes and marshes with extensive open water bordered by emergent vegetation. During winter they move to saltwater or brackish bays, estuaries, or sheltered sea coasts and are less frequently found on freshwater lakes or rivers. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Western_Grebe/lifehistory )

I Am Not Going To Making Duck Face For You!

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 250.

Common Eider ( Males )

What did Detective Duck say to his partner?

“Let’s quack this case!”

Interesting Fact: A famous colony lives on the Farne Islands in Northumberland, Britain. These birds were the subject of one of the first ever bird protection laws, established by Saint Cuthbert in the year 676. About 1,000 pairs still nest there every year. ( https://identify.whatbird.com/obj/1095/overview/Common_Eider.aspx )

I Am As Low As Your Lowrider!

F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 250.

Carolina Wren 

How do you drown a Hipster?

In the mainstream.

Interesting Fact: They are known to build multiple nests to confuse predators. ( http://identify.whatbird.com/obj/677/overview/Carolina_Wren.aspx )

 

Out For A Run!

F/8.0, 1/250, ISO 250.

Mourning Dove

Why did the picture go to jail?

Because it was framed.

Interesting Fact:  Perhaps one reason why Mourning Doves survive in the desert: they can drink brackish spring water (up to almost half the salinity of sea water) without becoming dehydrated the way humans would. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Mourning_Dove )