F/10.0, 1/400, ISO 800.
Common Loon ( Nonbreeding adult )
What computer sings the best?
A Dell.
Interesting Fact: Loons are agile swimmers, but they move pretty fast in the air, too. Migrating loons have been clocked flying at speeds more than 70 mph. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Common_Loon/lifehistory )
F/5.6, 1/1600, ISO 400.
Mute Swan
Why was the snowman sad?
Cause he had a meltdown.
Interesting Fact: Male Mute Swans select the nest site and may start several nests before the female accepts the location. Nest sites are safe from flooding yet offer easy access to water, with ample nesting materials and food nearby–often on a small peninsula, along a heavily vegetated shoreline, or on a small to medium-sized island. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Mute_Swan/lifehistory )
F/10.0, 1/1600, ISO 800.
Common Merganser
A police officer was escorting a prisoner to jail when his hat blew off.
“Shall I run and get it for you?” asked the prisoner obligingly.
“Do you think I am a fool” said the officer.
“You stand here and I’ll get it.”
Interesting Fact: The oldest Common Merganser on record was a female, and at least 13 years, 5 months old. She was banded in Oklahoma in 1938 and found in Wisconsin in 1950. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Common_Merganser/lifehistory )
F/6.3, 1/2500, ISO 320.
Red-tailed Hawk
One day a man came home from work to find his wife crying hysterically in the kitchen.
“What’s wrong, dearest?” asked the confused husband.
“Oh darling,” sobbed the wife,
“I was cleaning little Jen’s room when I found whips, handcuffs and chains under her bed, along with a very erotic porn magazine! What ever are we going to do?”
“Well,” replied the man, “I guess a spanking is out of the question?”
Interesting Fact: The oldest known wild Red-tailed Hawk was at least 30 years, 8 months old when it was found in Michigan in 2011, the same state where it had been banded in 1981. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Red-tailed_Hawk/overview )
F/6.3, 1/250, ISO 1600.
Ring-Necked Pheasant
What is dangerous?
Sneezing while having diarrhea!
Interesting Fact: Pheasants, along with most members of the grouse family, have specialized, powerful breast muscles—the “white meat” that you find on a chicken. These muscles deliver bursts of power that allow the birds to escape trouble in a hurry, flushing nearly vertically into the air and reaching speeds of nearly 40 miles per hour. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Ring-necked_Pheasant/lifehistory )
F/7.1, 1/200, ISO 320.
Eastern Bluebird
In Court:
Judge: “Why did you steal the car?”
Defendant: “Your Honour I had to get to work.”
Judge: “Why didn’t you take the bus?”
Defendant: I don’t have a driver’s license for the bus.
Interesting Fact: Eastern Bluebirds occur across eastern North America and south as far as Nicaragua. Birds that live farther north and in the west of the range tend to lay more eggs than eastern and southern birds. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Eastern_Bluebird )
F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 1250.
Bald Eagles
What falls but never gets hurt?
The rain!
Interesting Fact: Bald Eagles occasionally hunt cooperatively, with one individual flushing prey towards another. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Bald_Eagle )
F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 200.
Red-breasted Merganser
Tom and Bobby are talking:
Bobby: “Holy crap, I just fell off a 50 ft ladder.”
Tom: “Oh my God, are you okay?”
Bobby: “Yeah it’s a good thing I fell off the first step.”
Interesting Fact: Its breedinghabitat is freshwater lakes and rivers across northern North America, Greenland, Europe, and Asia. It nests in sheltered locations on the ground near water. It is migratory and many northern breeders winter in coastalwaters further south. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red-breasted_merganser#Behaviour )
F/13.0, 1/640, ISO 400.
Mallard
As a scarecrow, people say I’m outstanding in my field.
But hay, it’s in my jeans.
Interesting Fact: Mallards, like other ducks, shed all their flight feathers at the end of the breeding season and are flightless for 3–4 weeks. They are secretive during this vulnerable time, and their body feathers molt into a concealing “eclipse” plumage that can make them hard to identify. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Mallard )
F/9.0, 1/320, ISO 160.
Sandhill Crane
A guy walks into a bar with a set of jumper cables…
the bartender says, buddy, I’ll serve you as long as you don’t start anything.
Interesting Fact: Sandhill Crane chicks can leave the nest within 8 hours of hatching, and are even capable of swimming. ( https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Sandhill_Crane/overview )
Through Open Lens 